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Will I regret getting dc an Xbox one?

(19 Posts)
llmb Fri 20-Oct-17 09:33:10

My dc don't have any consoles and have been going on for years. They have iPads only. They are 9 and 11 and desperate for one for Xbox (to share) other than the usual getting then off... are there likely to be any issues I need to know off? I worry about the internet, how can they connect to friends and not just any old person on the internet etc?

HappyLollipop Fri 20-Oct-17 09:41:17

Well they'll need to take turns playing it as most games these days don't come with split screen for 2 players any more that's why many kids I know have their own Xbox but at 11 and 9 this probably won't be an issue just yet as they will be playing more child orientated games like lego series (which are great for kids) or minecraft . I'd keep them off Xbox live until they're a lot older too maybe 14+ don't get sucked into thinking online play is essential, it's not suitable for the extremely young.

lagspike79 Fri 20-Oct-17 10:08:24

Definitely a good point by HappyLollipop about Xbox Live - any kind of social interaction on the Internet can be very difficult to filter, especially for young children. For this reason I don't even allow my elder son (8) to play Minecraft online, as I would never be able to filter the incoming chat!

I would strongly recommend something like the Nintendo Switch (had that not come out, I'd have recommended the Wii U). I bought the Wii U instead of a PlayStation 4 years ago and never regretted the decision; not only does it have Minecraft but also a huge raft of unforgettably great games (Mario Kart, Legend of Zelda etc). The Switch has a much better form factor; as it blends the best of console and handheld benefits and is extremely portable for holidays.

If the Switch is too expensive (it certainly is for us at the moment!) then if you can catch a Wii U on offer then it's still an excellent console with a huge range of games. Our two children have loved it.

llmb Fri 20-Oct-17 11:31:11

We've had a wii u for years but they don't play on it (it's actually broken any way) they don't like a lot of games and eldest struggles with the controller as super sensitive.

So online does concern me.... so there is no way of only joining online with friends? Or is it all or nothing?

lagspike79 Fri 20-Oct-17 17:14:17

The problem with online play is that you do not control the situation - you cannot vet or filter people your children might play with. Most games have a free chat system, whereby anyone could type anything to your kids. For me at least, that's a deal-breaker.

However, there are some games whose domains you can control. There are some games which do not allow free-text chat, and instead players can only choose emoticons, or their characters can only "emote" (e.g. salute, wave, chuckle, etc). If they are Minecrafters, you can set up a private server which you pay for and administer, and these allow "whitelisting" - so your server will only accept users with specific user names you have vetted and accepted prior to allowing. I've done this for my eight-year old.

With things like Xbox Live and PlayStation Plus, most games can accommodate very toxic behaviour, as can anything with free-text chat (e.g. MMOs like World of Warcraft in particular). The honest answer is that it entirely depends on the game. Games which are not multiplayer are safest, while those which allow local play (Wii U etc.) can be immense fun. If your Wii U is definitely to be shelved, perhaps look into a Switch or a handheld, such as the Nintendo 2DS?

llmb Fri 20-Oct-17 17:24:09

Try have Nintendo 3ds.... my particularly hasn't played with it for ages. I think, because he's started secondary school, they all seem to have one.....

So can you not get games and not connect to the internet or is it not that simple?!

NameChanger22 Fri 20-Oct-17 17:30:00

DD asked for one. I told her she could get one when she gets her own place. End of discussions. She has a tablet, phone and Nintendo 3ds and that's more than enough technology for one person.

user1494670108 Fri 20-Oct-17 17:35:30

I don’t regret getting my ds (now 10) one. He’s had it a year, it has a timer on it to avoid the arguments about coming off. He played by himself mostly for the 1st year, this year he meets friends from school on it in the evenings.
He makes his “party “ ie gaming session invite only and doesn’t talk to randoms - he’s not had any issues yet.
We keep it downstairs so he’s nearby I wouldn’t want it in the bedroom.

Flimp Fri 20-Oct-17 17:36:20

If you do get one (and I would) make sure you learn about it. Be involved. Understand how it works and how to make it as safe as possible. Figure out the lingo.

Our kids are 12 and 10 and have had a PS4 for ages. They are allowed to play online but they're only allowed to add friends from school and cousins. We can hear who they're talking to and we can read the chats.

WeeMadKelpie Fri 20-Oct-17 17:39:42

I’ve just sold my Xbox one. Just set them up a Microsoft account when they join Xbox live, it will automatically assign them as a child account. From your parent account you can age restrict, privacy restrict, screen time and much more.

I sold mine because I have 4dc and the constant asking who’s turn and fighting over it drove me demented.

LookAtAllTheBullshit Fri 20-Oct-17 17:40:37

With Xbox live that is the subscription that enables the online aspect of Xbox, some games require it.
The online access to your child depends on games and settings, a lot of online games have the option of join or invite friends only and if you host a game you can set it to public(anyone), friends only, invite only or private (no one can join).
In order for someone to join your friends list they have to request to join and you accept or decline.

Ransoms can send you messages at any point though.

You can when online set your profile to appear offline so if someone searched your gamer tag it would show you were offline-of course that is an appearance as if you are physically in an online game then people know you are online even if you appear offline.

Where are you planning on having it set up for them to play? There is a way that if they are using headsets for chat, you can set it so you can hear the other people through the to so you can hear what is being said to your child.

LookAtAllTheBullshit Fri 20-Oct-17 17:41:37


llmb Fri 20-Oct-17 18:46:01

It would be in the front room... I'm not very good with tech and my eldest has asd and doesn't always tell the truth and iv seen him chatting on roblox when iv said no... the online bit is my main concern...

MyOtherProfile Fri 20-Oct-17 18:48:19

Our kids and their friends all.hang out on Xbox together remotely. That's the best thing about it. They can play games while chatting to their friends or even play the game with their friends. It doesn't beat actual face to face contact but its what they all do.

LookAtAllTheBullshit Fri 20-Oct-17 19:18:08

I used the Xbox as a way to help teach my kids some online safety.
I set the rules:
No sending friend requests unless I agree.
No accepting friend requests unless I agree.
I read every message you get.

They mainly stuck to it but occasionally broke the rules.

One really good thing about Xbox, they do have a good reporting system to report trolling and abusive messages or chatters that result in ever increasing bans from messaging or head set chat and they do suspend accounts.

You can also unfriend and block people yourself and they can't contact you unless you lift the block.

llmb Fri 20-Oct-17 19:18:25

That's what my eldest wants to do myother....

But I worry about everyone else out there!

LookAtAllTheBullshit Fri 20-Oct-17 19:20:21

I taught my kids we know nothing about these people, they are nameless, faceless people (unless school mates).
No personal information shared, people can horrible but I had an element of control.

But I am comfortable around Xbox as I have one.

LookAtAllTheBullshit Fri 20-Oct-17 19:23:23

And being a female gamer gets its own set of trolling, so I have shown them some of the (more appropriate) messages and random friend requests I have got and taught them it is absolutely fine to decline requests and to report and block.

MyOtherProfile Fri 20-Oct-17 22:58:37

We haven't really had any mad experiences but they only play in public with the door open and I can hear.

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