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Please help -Ramadan/Eid for non Muslims

(33 Posts)
madsiemoomoo Wed 13-Jun-18 21:08:42

We moved to a new area last year, and our lovely Muslim neighbour brought round chocolates today.

We were very touched, I know Ramadan is coming to a close and Eid is Friday/Saturday but I am quite embarrassed to say that I have absolutely no idea what the etiquette is here - so I thought I would ask you lovely lot.

I'd like to get them a gift, but have no idea whether this would be putting my foot in it? If not, suggestions on what I could get and the best timing to give it would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks

Musicalmistress Wed 13-Jun-18 21:40:58

A small gift of some sweets will be very much appreciated I’m sure.

WingsofNylon Wed 13-Jun-18 21:46:46

That's really kind of you. I was brought up Muslim and had a neighbour dropped round something sweet to say happy eid we would have been very touched. Did tends to be celebrated differently depends on culture so a family of Asian background will have differences to an Egyptian family for example. But you can guarantee good will be involved so i suggest you bake some biscuits. That's what people always brought us.

madsiemoomoo Wed 13-Jun-18 22:58:44

Thanks both smile

Noeuf Wed 13-Jun-18 23:01:51

Why though? Because she gave you chocolates - that's a 'welcome to the neighbourhood' thing and then you'll get into a cycle of gift giving.

Because she's (you think) Muslim? You aren't - are you going to start gifting to all the different neighbours? Chocolates at Christmas? Etc.

Why not just let your neighbourly relationship develop?

cupcakesandglitter Wed 13-Jun-18 23:10:21

I don't see what the problem is with chocolates - lovely thought 😊

DuchessOMalley Wed 13-Jun-18 23:38:07

That's a lovely idea OP, I'm sure an Eid gift will be greatly appreciated 🙂

melse2964 Wed 13-Jun-18 23:55:59

Yea thats lovely of you, maybe some sweets or just a card for Eid xx

user1490043295 Thu 14-Jun-18 00:33:08

Thats a lovely idea. Sweets will go down well after month of fasting. Just beaware that they are vegetarian sweets and do not contain alcohol

ElderflowerWaterIsDelish Thu 14-Jun-18 04:51:03

Why not buy her flowers (either a bunch of flowers or a tiny plant pot with flowers already growing, the type you can get from market for a couple of pound) and a nice handwritten thank you note in a thank you card thanking her for such a lovely gesture...it is easier than buying food (doesn't Muslims food have to be halal and some sweets aren't halal )

Sickofpeople Thu 14-Jun-18 04:54:05

I would buy flowers.
If you are going to buy sweets then make sure they are veggie.

technojoe Thu 14-Jun-18 05:26:07

If you go to an asian supermarket and ask if they have some Jalebi or Rasgula, they are very traditional sweet desserts but well liked in the Muslim community.

BikeRunSki Thu 14-Jun-18 05:32:10

Don’t forget to wish them “Eid Mubarak”.

Somewhereoverthesanddune Thu 14-Jun-18 05:47:44

There isn't one homogeneous 'Muslim community' that all love the same sweets.

sashh Thu 14-Jun-18 06:57:51

My Muslim colleagues loved my cheesecake.

Noeuf Thu 14-Jun-18 07:36:54

It's a weird MN thing that when someone discovers they have a Muslim neighbour or colleague they have to post about it and ask how to do something fairly normal.

There's a whiff of virtue signalling in it.

It's also slightly patronising - why involve yourself in someone else's customs? A bit look at me the lovely gracious person being very pc and kind, not like those DM readers.

LoniceraJaponica Thu 14-Jun-18 07:40:19

Really Noeuf hmm

Do you always look for the negative in a nice gesture?

Jesuisleloup Thu 14-Jun-18 07:45:23

I think all Muslim people that I know would appreciate it : box of chocs (Cadbury’s heroes maybe) or cake would be fine. And say Eid Muburak. Nice idea! I think they will be touched & nicely surprised.

Noeuf Thu 14-Jun-18 07:47:02

@LoniceraJaponica
Read my post; I don't think it's a nice gesture

LoniceraJaponica Thu 14-Jun-18 12:39:44

Why?

Thecurtainsofdestiny Thu 14-Jun-18 13:41:30

Noeuf why isn't it a nice gesture? Our Muslim neighbours gave us an Easter egg.

I think reciprocity is important in relationships.

colditz Thu 14-Jun-18 13:47:19

I LOVE Jalabi. I'm not Muslim or Indian, but have a massive liking for sweet fried things. I never tasted one until a cafe near me got taken over by Indian people and they started selling them in the chiller next to the cans.

They're chewy and syrupy and borderline sickly GOD I love them but the cafe closed down and now there's nowhere near me to buy them.

ahem

as you were

Tenantworry Thu 14-Jun-18 14:18:52

Noeuf our old Muslim neighbours gave us a Christmas card and a box of chocs at Christmas and brought us food on Eid.
I don't see the issue.
I think people ask on Mumsnet for ideas of what to give because they are aware of food related restrictions and don't want to get it wrong rather than virtue signalling.
I asked on here years ago when my dc wanted to give sweets out on her birthday at an afterschool sports activity and a couple of the kids were Muslim so I didn't want to get something they couldn't have. I didn't do drop off so couldn't ask the parents.

Xenia Thu 14-Jun-18 15:15:20

Flowers sound a good idea.

Given the UK's massive problem with sugar the more we can abolish the regular giving of what is basically something dreadful the better though.

Cloudly Thu 14-Jun-18 15:27:05

A lovely thought there why not check online when Eid is first. If they have children maybe chocolates, flowers, Eid card, I can reassure you they will not mind they will greatly appreciate the kindness from you.

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