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Oh no! Mil is feeding umpteen of us on one small joint.

(757 Posts)
imgoingoutforchips Sun 16-Apr-17 15:47:12

Staying at inlaws and flipping starving.
Lunch was quiche and salad. I looked in vain for a baked spud or crusty loaf.
Now she's started dinner and there will be two potatoes each and one joint, estimate about 800g uncooked. There is some other veg but no yorkshires or stuffing. To feed inlaws, my family of six (inc two adult size appetite teens) and sil's family, of 5. Possibly bil and their two small kids may stay too.

I am starving. My kids have stashes of chocolate to get them through. What am I going to do? It's Easter Sunday in v rural location. Where can I get chips?

fabulous01 Sun 16-Apr-17 15:48:14

I used to stay with my pal and had same thing..... good luck ....

haveacupoftea Sun 16-Apr-17 15:49:38

I love these threads! There were loads of them at Christmas about people who were guests at PIL and were starved.

Surely there will be a Chinese open within driving distance?

Natsku Sun 16-Apr-17 15:49:48

I bet she's the kind of person that can make twenty meals from a chicken.

PurpleDaisies Sun 16-Apr-17 15:50:17

I feel your pain. My inlaws serve tiny portions and we have to take emergency food. Is there a McDonalds near you?!

alltouchedout Sun 16-Apr-17 15:51:12

Too rural for just eat?
I don't understand under caterers, probably because my whole family are the exact opposite and take it very personally if you aren't stuffed to the point of finding it hard to walk after they've fed you.

TinyBarista Sun 16-Apr-17 15:51:36

MIL is hoping to recreate the mumsnet chicken grin . She walks amongst us.
Good luck OP.

LemonRedwood Sun 16-Apr-17 15:51:38

Definitely find a drive-thru, under the guise of needing to pop out for some personal bits!

Pinkheart5915 Sun 16-Apr-17 15:52:00

Is this like the Mumsnet chicken? Feed 50 on 1 tiny joint?

Seriously though portion sizes sounds a bit mean, I will be you know actually feeding my guests today

Steal your dc chocolate? Have a cup of coffee and ask for biscuits?

storynanny Sun 16-Apr-17 15:53:45

Haha! Reminds me of visiting my elderly, comfortably off parents with 3 hungry teenage boys. 4 slices of ham would appear as the major ingredient for a nice ham tea with salad ( bit of lettuce and a few sliced toms) accompanied by a small sliced crusty loaf, for 7 people. Followed by a dry shop bought cake. Fortunately my boys took it all in good humour as part of eccentricities of old age.
We had to stop for fish and chips on the way home every time .

imgoingoutforchips Sun 16-Apr-17 15:55:13

I haven't seen a biscuit yet. Some small cookie things yesterday but don't know where they live. I'm going to have to drag dh out late for scenic drive aka chip hunt.

Fireinthegrate Sun 16-Apr-17 15:56:05

Why don't you ask if she needs any help in the kitchen preparing the meal? Then You could peel a few extra spuds or suggest you whip up a batter for yorkies.

imgoingoutforchips Sun 16-Apr-17 15:56:13

My teens are girls but still eat plenty. Lucky we don't have boys or I don't know what would happen.

Batteriesallgone Sun 16-Apr-17 15:56:33

Can't DH just say something? Or do they not listen?

madamginger Sun 16-Apr-17 15:56:41

I have 2 legs of lamb to feed 8 of us!
You need to order a takeaway for later.

imgoingoutforchips Sun 16-Apr-17 15:57:35

Fire - you haven't met my mil. There's no messing around. I did peel carrots as quickly as I could to get as many done as possible. There is a decent amount of veg, just spuds and meat that's scarce.

PurpleDaisies Sun 16-Apr-17 15:57:49

My teens are girls but still eat plenty. Lucky we don't have boys or I don't know what would happen.

If your mil is like some people I know, they give proper portions to boys/men but expect girls to have dainty appetites. I definitely do not!

Crunchymum Sun 16-Apr-17 15:59:48

So there is at least 13 people eating? And that is all they have to serve? shock

StillStayingClassySanDiego Sun 16-Apr-17 15:59:50

I'm of the mind that too much food is better than not enough, is she always like this? 800g of meatshock.

I've just done Easter lunch for 7 adults and a 2.2 kg leg of lamb has been demolished.

imgoingoutforchips Sun 16-Apr-17 15:59:56

I want two legs of lamb!

I've managed Christmas before by bringing my own big turkey and quantities of sausages. Nearly giving mil heart failure but at least we didn't starve.

longlostpal Sun 16-Apr-17 16:00:30

Can you get your husband to suggest some extra potatoes or something? We tend to eat small portions in our house (I know others on mumsnet have strong views on this subject, but 2 potatoes would be fine by me) but if it is literally 50g of meat per person as you describe, it does sound like it hasn't been thought through properly and it would not be unreasonable to politely point this out.

floraeasy Sun 16-Apr-17 16:01:30

LOL, love your username!

My advice won't be much use to you on this occasion, but for future visits take your own stash of peanuts, cereal bars, whatever keeps and can be eaten on the QT in your room.

Meanwhile, drink loads of water to fill and up and try get as many teas/coffees as you can to keeping ticking over.

halobean Sun 16-Apr-17 16:01:59

Oh god. My mil does this and it takes hours! This is why we never go there now for holidays as I would actually die. I always get less as I am a women too. So yeah, they are welcome here, but fuck going there with her rations.

UnbornMortificado Sun 16-Apr-17 16:02:07

You should come to my mams, she's a feeder. She also thinks blokes need much bigger portions but that's a whole other thread.

My local chippy opens at 5 and I'm fairly rural too, might be worth checking. If not can you not fill up on bread and butter?

Natsku Sun 16-Apr-17 16:02:51

I'm doing about 1kg of lamb plus 500g-ish of potatoes and a bundle of asparagus for three of us, one a small child. I'll think of you when I'm contemplating the leftovers grin

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