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Has anyone had psychotherapy?

(31 Posts)
JamesDelaneysHat Wed 12-Apr-17 21:10:12

What does it actually involve? Not just someone passively listening, like a counsellor? Do they challenge you or offer insight?

msrisotto Wed 12-Apr-17 21:14:19

I have. No the therapist wasn't passive at all and they were from the jungian psychoanalytic school of therapy which is the most 'blank screen' type. She was supportive at times, provided insight, probed for more information and stuff. I found it an amazing journey. I would do it again in an instant (when our calendars work out ad she has a space for me when I can make it....)

JamesDelaneysHat Wed 12-Apr-17 21:19:15

Thanks msrisotto. I'm thinking of it for childhood stuff and wondering if psychotherapy is the best approach.

msrisotto Wed 12-Apr-17 21:34:34

Go for it. Do you know how to go about finding/choosing a therapist?

DioneTheDiabolist Wed 12-Apr-17 21:37:19

I had Gestalt therapy and found it challenging, insightful and amazing.

JamesDelaneysHat Wed 12-Apr-17 21:38:20

They should be BACP registered? I've had a look online and found some in my area but I'm not sure how to choose which one as they all sound similar?

notadutchie Wed 12-Apr-17 21:41:24

Get in touch with them and see who you click with. You can tell them you're looking at options for someone to work with, if you want, they will understand and know you need to feel comfortable with whomever you choose.

Notsandwiches Wed 12-Apr-17 21:43:35

First one I tried was dreadful. £45 an hour to be told "thoughts are not things". Currently with a different one and she's much better. She's a systemic therapist.

msrisotto Wed 12-Apr-17 21:43:59

Look here UKCP Website

TupperwareTat Wed 12-Apr-17 21:46:47

I havn't but am very interested to see what its about. I have been thinking of arranging something through my g.p.

msrisotto Wed 12-Apr-17 21:47:07

If you're looking for childhood exploration, i'd go with a someone who trained in psychodynamic/psychoanalytic methods, or gestalt. Systemic is good too. I'd go for someone with a bit of experience. UKCP membership requires decent training I believe so you shouldn't have to worry about that.

JamesDelaneysHat Wed 12-Apr-17 21:48:35

I thinks it's pretty rare to get this kind of therapy on the NHS Tupperware. They want people to have cbt because it's short term and cheaper to 'administer'.

JamesDelaneysHat Wed 12-Apr-17 21:49:11

Thanks msrisotto I'll have a look on that website.

Lottapianos Wed 12-Apr-17 21:50:26

I was in therapy for 7 years. By far the best thing i have ever done for myself. Possibly the hardest, but definitely the best.

Yes my therapist challenged me at times and at times i resented that and found it uncomfortable. Therapy is hard work and can be very painful but you develop a much deeper understanding of yourself, your feelings, your needs and your boundaries. I cannot recommend it enough

Have a look for a local psychotherapist on the BACP website

Reddingtonsmoll Wed 12-Apr-17 21:56:04

I did two years weekly psychotherapy. I tried various therapists until I found the right one for me. They should be bacp registered and anyone worth their salt will be reasonably priced. Mine was £45 an hour. I could go through what was right for me but it's a highly individual choice. I valued highly trained and very professional boundaries. I knew my therapist was focussed 100% on me. I knew nothing about her until our final session. I respected every moment we had together. It's a complex and individual union. I am an entirely different person now. I cannot praise psychotherapy highly enough. It's tough emotional and challenging work but worth it.

Reddingtonsmoll Wed 12-Apr-17 21:57:09

Please feel free to pm me if you want more info.

JamesDelaneysHat Wed 12-Apr-17 22:01:11

Thanks all. I'm wondering if I'm robust or resilient enough for it now! I think I need someone to say, yes that was one fucked up childhood and your family is highly dysfunctional and this is how it may have made you behave and believe in as an adult. Is that a reasonable expectation?

Puffykins Wed 12-Apr-17 22:02:53

I had psychotherapy for a year - on the NHS - and it was amazing. Life changing, even. A lot was to look at early family stuff, and what I liked was that there was never any blame - just looking at possible reasons for why x acts like she does, and it taught me to manage my expectations better - and got me off anti depressants. My doctor prescribed it after I had post-natal depression twice, and two rounds of CBT didn't really help, at all. I now have the option to see my psychotherapist privately, if I want to, which is equally great.

Puffykins Wed 12-Apr-17 22:05:48

Oh, and in regards to your last post, yes that is a reasonable expectation. I got the affirmation I needed that I was not mothered as I should have been, but then we looked at why - which then helped my forgive my mother - and our relationship is now a million times better. And it's helped me ease up on my hyper protection of my children - which was a reaction to my childhood, etc. Good luck!

CaulkheadNorth Wed 12-Apr-17 22:13:29

I've been in twice-weekly therapy for over 6 years. It's brilliant. Hard, challenging and totally about finding the right person. She can call me on the bullshit that no one else can! I would totally recommend it and wish more people did it.

Don't go expecting it to be easy though, and expect to build a relationship with them and to be at it for a while.

chopchopchop Wed 12-Apr-17 22:19:42

I did it for two and a half years and it changed my life, totally changed my ability to have a fulfilling relationship. I was so glad I did.

Your expectations are entirely reasonable. I would add to them, and change the dysfunctional behaviours for the better.

Good luck. It's not always easy but its so worth it. (and I did enjoy quite a lot of it as well).

CaulkheadNorth Wed 12-Apr-17 22:21:58

I feel that there are very few places where it's all about you. I get to talk for an hour on whatever I want. I don't need to ask how she is or make normal conversation. I don't think you realise how much you need that, especially if you had dysfunctional family life when growing up.

Branleuse Wed 12-Apr-17 22:26:24

I had a course of psychotherapy on the NHS a few years ago and it was really good, it changed my life

TowerRingInferno Wed 12-Apr-17 22:45:43

I had it (on the NHS) to get over an abusive childhood. I think I had about 15 hourly sessions (was supposed to be just 6!). It was horribly painful, and things had to get much worse before they could get better, but it was fantastic. Every week I wanted to give up but made myself do just one more session. Made me think and talk about things I'd subconsciously blocked out.

My psychotherapist said almost nothing and made me fill in the horrible awkward silences.

mycatsmellsnice Wed 12-Apr-17 23:17:23

4 months in here, therapist uses transactional analysis and I'm finding it very healing. Yes to dealing with early life stuff and taking the guilt out of it. She gives me space to think but also chips in and reflects back. Will give me honest feedback if I ask.

In just a few months I've found it possible to forgive old hurts but also see where I'm still being manipulated in personal relationships (ie by my mother). Love my mum to bits but am now stepping back a bit from her neediness and demands without feeling guilty about it or needing to confront her in anger. Massive and positive move forward for me.

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