Sending your own DC Private

[Lacey405]

I am debating sending DD1 to a GDST from y3. She is currently at a school near me, is happy and doing well but as a teacher I know full well the constraints and budget cuts that are affecting the school (all schools in our borough).

Having the summer holidays with her we have been able to do heaps in the way of science , art, history , RE and a bit of French . She has just loved this (as have I!!) and it does upset me as a teacher and parent that these subjects are slowly being squeezed out of the curriculum in the state system in favour of teaching to SATs. I would love to be able to plan & deliver more interesting and engaging lessons on these but as it is all my energies go into Maths and English . It would mean me going from 3 days to FT but I have been toying with this anyway as it seems If I’m serious about any form of promotion (currently just finished PT NQT year) I need to go FT. Anyone done this ? Not necessarily because I think she’ll do “better” but I’m because I think she would love the extra breadth and depth of the WC subjects . Objectively speaking she is very bright and interested in learning but I don’t feel necessarily extended appropriately (just as I am not always able to do so with the more able ones 100% time in my isn’t class) at her current (very caring and happy) primary .

Anyone had similar thoughts / gone down this route for their own DC?

[Mistressiggi]

No I haven't considered this. All the state secondaries near us so plenty of the the subjects you mention so I would never feel the need - I am also in general against the idea of working in a system that isn't good enough for your own dcs! But I imagine I am in the minority on here.

[BlankTimes]

Could you get a job teaching at the school you'd like your dd to attend?
That way you could also teach a wider range of subjects so more job satisfaction for you and her fees would be minimal.

[greathat]

Every now and then I consider homeschooling for the same reasons. My eldest is gifted though so she basically teaches herself, I think I'd lose the plot trying to get me youngest to do anything

[Lacey405]

mistress I do see where you are coming from. I love teaching my class I have had the most fantastic group of kids this year and I really do want to do better for them. Some of them are so interested in our other topics but all we are pushing at the moment is maths and English. Everything else is squeezed into this afternoon . I’m imagining secondaries are more balanced ?

blanktimes I would love to do this and an constanly keeping an eye out for vacancies but nothing really ever seems to come up there at primary level. I’m constantly checking though !

greatthat yes homeschooling would be ideal from that point of view but I do worry that we’d both miss the social aspect of school! I was a SAHM for a while and it drove me potty 😂.

Thank you for your responses.

[MoltoAgitato]

The new Ofste framework places much more weight on a broader curriculum, so it should curb the worst excesses of teaching to the test. And having seen the quality of some of the teaching at private schools I'm not sure I'd bother. A well regarded private school near us makes a big show of teaching violin to primary aged children,but it's whole class lessons and after a few years most of them are still incapable of Twinkle Twinkle.

[Lacey405]

molto that’s a very good point thank you. Yes I do wonder if sometimes I’m being taken in by the glossy brochure, lovely uniform and general “feel” of the place as well.

[PumpkinPie2016]

My son has just finished reception and personally, I wouldn't send him private (although it's each to their own of course!).

His primary school is lovely and all year groups do a wide variety of subjects and activities. For a smallish village school they do loads with them. He seemingly has a bit of a gift for Maths and they have gone out of their way to extend him in this area.

Equally, writing isn't his favourite activity but they have worked hard with him and he has come on leaps and bounds.

The state secondary I work in ensures all children have a broad and balanced curriculum and again, we are constantly going out of our way to ensure they enjoy a wide variety of additional activities as well as normal lessons.

Our two nephews went to the local fee pay it grammar school and in all honesty, they didn't get anything that they wouldn't have got at a decent state school. In fact, the elder one particularly wasn't pushed academically and could have done better than he did.

If she is happy at her school and has support at home (which she clearly does) then I would leave her be.

[Aragog]

I have taught in state secondaries and in primary.

My Dd went to an independent school for both primary and secondary,,m and now at a state school sixth form.

We made the choice for a range of reasons including wrap around care which our local state options didn't offer, and the fact that she could start in the September and not January which is what happened at the time in our area. We choose the school which just felt right after visiting several schools in both sectors. Dh also was part of that decision making, so bit just my choice.

No one, including other teachers or parents, has ever negatively questioned our decision and it's never had a negative impact on my ability to teach. I've always given 100% to my job. Infact Dd has done an awful lot of voluntary work in the state sector (my school and others locally) and is planning to become a primary school teacher so will herself be moving into state school teaching after university, all being well.

[Aragog]

Over the years I've also known a number of teachers who have children in private schools. I don't think it's that unusual.
Likewise I know a number of teachers in Private schools with children in state schools too.

[Hoppinggreen]

Dd is at Private Secondary, in her class of 17 3 of them have a parent who teaches at the school ( good discount I understand)

[reefedsail]

My DS goes to a traditional sort of 3-13 prep because DH teaches in an associated school and we get a remission.

TBH, it's what enables me to work FT. He goes in for breakfast with the boarders at 7.30, then the regular school day for everyone in his year is 8am- 5pm. Within that there is time set aside for homework- they are not supposed to bring any home. He can stay until 6pm every day doing included activities and could stay for dinner if needed.

I teach in a state primary 15 mins away and can easily fit my working day inside his. That would be far more difficult to do if he also went to a state school. He doesn't feel as though he is in childcare, because the long hours are just business as usual at his school.

He has very long holidays- but that works for us as DH can do most of the time when I'm still in school.

[Its2oclockinthemorning]

My two go private. We made the decision originally for wrap around care purposes as I worked next door to the school. If we hadn’t done that then I would have probably quit work. There were some childminders but they were also very expensive for the value you would get from them (around 400 pounds a month for what we needed and private Ed was around 700 a month)

I am starting an New job soon and am anxious about what other teachers think of me because of my decision. There area lot of anti private school people but there are many reasons why you would send your kids private. Although I must say my eldest has 9 kids in his class and there is also a TA and I can’t imagine now what the alternative would be like in terms of attention he’s been given.

[Its2oclockinthemorning]

Aragog what you said about never being questioned is reassuring to hear

[dairymilkmonster]

I am not a teacher. However my cousin teaches in the state sector (secondary, comp)an always has. She has a ds at private secondary and younger dd who is currently state but will move for secondary. Her decision seems to be based on feeling the atmosphere/aspirations/ attitude towards being involved in 'uncool' activities like music, debating, optional latin is increibld different between her local comps and private options.
I would do whatever you think is best for your dc.
I work for the nhs but have accessed private healthcare at times when it seemed the best option for us, i see nothing wrong with that.

[CraftyGin]

All five of mine were in independent schools. Just one more year to go.

[nonicknameseemsavailable]

my mum taught primary and sent me to a GDST school. our local state school wasn't good (not where she taught) and it was the right decision for me, I was very happy there and did very well. Main reason she went back to work was to be able to give me more opportunities. Do what feels right for you and your family.

[olivo]

I worked for 20 years in state school s but chose an independent primary for my Dc as the local primary was not in a good place. We then chose independent secondaries, as we wanted single sex. I now work in one of them (no discount )

[BloodyhellMartha]

I'm not against private schools per se - but I would never be able to afford to send my own DC to one on a teaching salary!

Looking at our nearest GDST school the termly fees are almost £4,000. That's just not doable for most of us unless your DH earns a lot. Particularly if you have more than one child. We need two salaries just to pay the mortgage/bills etc - there isn't enough left over for school fees.

[Lacey405]

Thank you all for your responses .We’ve been speaking about it all week and I just don’t think we can justify the extra . We are the fortunate position that we could potentially afford it as DH salary pays mortgage and bills etc and mine is the cushion / nice to have extras but I just feel anxious that it’s too much of a commitment to start her at 7 and then ties me in to working FT for the next 15 years or so (DC2 to think about also and we would have to do the same) I do think it would be better and broader (more so I think at primary level than secondary compared to a good state secondary) but possibly not £15k a year better .

[PinkFlowerFairy]

Think what else you could buy with that 15k! Deposit for a house, extra curricular activities, days out etc...

[Fuzzyspringroll]

I'm considering sending DS to a private primary when the time comes. However, we'd need to have a look at our state options here first.
My main concern is the language. DS is bilingual, as is the private school we are considering. Additionally, unlike in the UK, fees are subsidised by the state and range at around £250/month.

[Banjodancer]

Two tutor sessions a week for a year would be under £3000

[OneOfTheGrundys]

I teach state secondary (English) and we have one at state and one in private, both secondary, KS3 age. Our privately educated DS has HFA. Our local state school has shockingly little provision for children with SN. His private school is small, quiet and flexible to his needs and it’s the best thing we’ve ever done for him. In fact, there he needs so additional support as the basic environment suits him so well. He’s happy, healthy and genuinely engaged in learning.
I’m not going to lie though-I’ve had a couple of cats bum mouth type reactions to our choice. All from other teachers with children without children with SN. I couldn’t care less what they think tbh.

[LolaSmiles]

I would consider it if finances allowed.

If I could haven't children in a state school like the one I work in then I wouldn't. If I had to choose between private or some other local schools then I would definitely look into how possible it would be. I fundamentally disagree with some choices on assessment and curriculum in some state secondaries (and increasingly primary too).

[Lacey405]

Thank you to everyone who’s contributed. We’re completely going round in circles . One minute I feel positive we could make it work, the school would be a fantastic fit for DD and I could cope with working FT. Then I’ll do a complete 360. I almost feel I have too much insider knowledge of the state of affairs at her current school, if I didn’t know what I knew I’d feel much happier !!!