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Need some advice

(15 Posts)
Teacherlikemisstrunchball Sun 17-Jun-18 18:26:17

Sooooo situation is this. HoD at an independent school. Big changes in management this year for a variety of reasons that I won’t go in to, but suffice it to say that life has become significantly harder at work. Essentially I’ve been demoted and have had a massive nosedive In confidence, which is having a huge impact on my mental health. Things are complicated by the fact my two children attend the school I teach at. There is a big commute, and work life balance is currently non-existent. Was happy to sacrifice family time etc when things were happy, but now I am angry and resentful and feel stressed all the time. Obviously life is complicated by my kids attending the school.

A job has come up at my old school (which I was very happy at-only left becsuse it was a boarding school and I was HOD and couldn’t imagine the workload) school is 5 mins down the road, position is only three days a week and no responsibility. I still have ex colleagues there who I am friendly with, and get on well with the Head. Kids at that school were the nicest I’ve ever taught. We could probably move DCs into another local school without too much trouble as they are relatively young still. But it would be a big pay cut. And loss of responsibility. we can probably absorb the loss of pay, but would I find the drop in ‘status’ for lack of a better word too difficult? I’d love to have a couple of days at home per week just to ‘be’ and regroup. Does anyone have any advice?

PotteringAlong Sun 17-Jun-18 18:29:51

I’d take it. I went from head of faculty to part time bog standard (for want of a better description) and thought I’d struggle with the fact that I could no longer make decisions grin

Actually, what’s happened is that I’ve now got time to plan and teach the lessons that I want to teach and I’ve remembered why I love the job.

WowLookAtYou Sun 17-Jun-18 18:30:12

No-brainier. Do it.

WowLookAtYou Sun 17-Jun-18 18:30:41

brainer!

Cyberworrier Sun 17-Jun-18 18:31:53

Sounds like it would make you happier to be at the other school. Surely that’s best for you as a person, for your family, and potentially for your career prospects as even if it’s part time there may be scope to go full time or take on more responsibilities if you enjoy it and do well? Go for it! (If you can afford it)

GreenTulips Sun 17-Jun-18 18:34:03

Well when you have little kids you need to step back and enjoy the time - regroup and come back when they are older and more independent

Life's too short

Go for it and see what happens

Teacherlikemisstrunchball Sun 17-Jun-18 18:39:13

DH is practically filling in the application form for me grin our current outgoings are large because of the nature of my job-We pay £800 in School fees PCM, and £200 PCM petrol to get there as it’s a 40 mile round trip and we have a cleaner that costs £150 because I’m always at sodding work and refuse to do hoovering at the weekend grin so if we could DCs into a local state school and just pay for a bit of wraparound (DH’s job flexible and we have some grandparents relatively nearby who are very helpful) We can absorb a big paycut.

Teacherlikemisstrunchball Sun 17-Jun-18 18:40:44

Looking at those numbers written down is a wake up call-my job is costing me over a grand a month and I hate it.

Thank you for posting - it’s good to hear opinions from other teachers-I can’t talk to colleagues IRL and don’t want to mention to friends at the moment.

LockedOutOfMN Sun 17-Jun-18 18:42:02

Sounds like you want to go for it and from where I'm standing it seems like it would be a wise move.

campion Sun 17-Jun-18 18:52:18

Definitely go for it. You'll be much happier. But do remember they're only paying you for 3 days as it's very easy to go into school on days off and end up staying /working (or was that just me?!)

jelliebelly Sun 17-Jun-18 18:58:20

I suppose it depends how much you value the private education your children get compared to the local school - not just now but when they get older too. I'm not a teacher but have a 60-90 minute commute each way to work in my full time job in order to earn enough to pay private school fees as I value that education hugely.

Teacherlikemisstrunchball Sun 17-Jun-18 18:59:58

campion This is a good point. My memories of working there before are very happy ones indeed, but I was Uber full time there (teaching 6 days per week, evening duties and chapel on Sundays) but part timers were always treated as part timers and there was no pressure to attend things on different days. I loved being HOD there, but it is definitely not a role for me right now. I just don’t want to be stressed out like this anymore. I’ve had two interviews this year as HOD at really really good schools (top 10 results in the country type of schools) to try and get out, and got to the last two of both. What made me realise that something has to change is that deep down I was relieved not to get them, I just haven’t got the energy at the moment. I feel that I have lost my spark sad I want to be at home more, with DCs and for them to have more local friends.

Teacherlikemisstrunchball Sun 17-Jun-18 19:01:49

jellie our local schools are very good, we are very lucky. If it doesn’t work out there are good private alternatives locally. At the moment although I am happy with the education my DCs are receiving, it’s not a school I would’ve chosen had I not been working there. So no real qualms about moving them on that score.

campion Sun 17-Jun-18 19:34:48

As long as the school respects part timers -and it sounds like they do - then you will find life less stressful and have time in your head for other thoughts.

My head asked me how she could make my part time job (in a top independent) into a full time one for me. I told her I really didn't want to work full time and gave her my reasons, and she was fine with that.I've never regretted it.

Roseandharry Tue 19-Jun-18 10:43:18

Do it!!! I'm not surprised having your DCs in the school adds extra pressure - I would never teach in a school where my kids are - personal choice. Also I dropped HOD responsibility a few years ago and best thing I ever did. Dropped from sometimes 80 hour weeks to never more than 40! Just not worth the money, particularly with a young family

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