What is the etiquette for addressing teachers?

[chocolatesun]

Should you use Mrs, etc, then surname? Or is it ok to call them by their first name? Obviously I’m only referring to instances when my child is not there.

[DazzlingMilton]

I only ever say Mr / Miss / Mrs etc... they only ever call me MrsMilton. I sign all my emails Dazzling Milton. It doesn’t take long to feel normal.

nb Milton was a dazzling grey showjumper, not my real name

[AllPizzasGreatAndSmall]

You should call them by the same name that your child does e.g. Miss Smith.

[donquixotedelamancha]

Start emails with 'your grace'.
Sign off with 'your obedient servant'.

It will freak them out nicely :-)

[aurorie11]

As parent, Mr/Ms. As a governor when children not in earshot first names

[chocolatesun]

Ok. In that case I think I made a mistake replying to a teacher and calling her by her first name. Whoops. It just felt strange writing ‘Mrs’ when that type of formality is rarely used in other settings, including professional settings. I have stuck with ‘Mrs’ when talking to teachers in person but it makes me cringe a bit. Sounds like I should stick with it

[chocolatesun]

donquixotedelamancha

🤣

[PinguDance]

I find this really funny! In my school the parents do call the treachers what the kids call them - miss plinkyplonk or what have you - and teachers call parents mrs/mr whatever. Somehow I always find it kind of cute that everyone addresses everyone by their surname as it happens so rarely these days.

[egginacup]

Use their teacher name in a school situation, unless you know them well- I was at a parents meeting thing the other day at my DD’s school and felt really irrationally annoyed at one of the PTA mums calling the teachers by their first names. They may have been besties outside of school for all I know but it just felt so wrong!

[chocolatesun]

I meant to say *when replying to an email from a teacher.

She didn’t respond so I wondered if I’d been inappropriate

[Ohlalasayohla]

Im a teacher with kids at a different school. I wait to see how their teachers introduce themselves and I call them exactly this. But if they go 'Ms x....' then so do I. If they use first names then I'm cool with that.

So simply put, if you want to use my first name then I'll be using yours.

[Racecardriver]

Mr/miss/ms/mrs/Dr surname until they invite you to use their first name. The same rule applies for everyone, not just teachers.

[Longdistance]

It should be, Miss, Mrs, Mr surname.

I’m a school secretary and if someone calls me by my first name, they’re mud. This is the same for my colleagues, we cringe at being called by our first names.

[OddBoots]

I doubt that would be the reason she hasn't replied, it more likely that she is busy. While title and name is the norm for addressing teachers in a school context it is unlikely to cause that much offence if you don't.

[iggleypiggly]

longdistance Why would you cringe at being called by your first name? That is something I will never understand, Dr’s yes but teachers? Adult to adult surely a first name is suitable?

[chocolatesun]

Oh no Longdistance, I refer to the school secretary by her first name! I didn’t realise that rule applied to admin staff, too!

Racecardriver I’m happy to go with the etiquette but outside the school setting first names is the norm and that absolutely includes business settings. Mr / Mrs May be used in some business settings if there is a cultural reason or some type of power imbalance (I dob mean that in a negative way, just a showing of respect is needed). The rules as school are clearly different!

[chocolatesun]

Oh dear just re-read that. Sorry for all the typos!

[Hoppinggreen]

I always use Mr/Mrs surname at school, even if I know the teacher outside of school (PTA/ same activity etc). If I speak to them out of school it’s firstname but only if I know them for no school related reasons.
Think that makes sense

[Unicorndiscoball]

I’m a teacher and Ds goes to the school I teach at. We all tend to call each other by our Mrs X, Mr Y names even in the staffroom I don’t know why-it just seems to happen! Parents pretty much always call me Mrs Discoball, even at kids parties for DS and his friends parents I know very well tend to sign off their emails with their first names, and I sign them Mrs D, rather than my full surname. I don’t think I’ve ever signed off a parent email with my first name in 10 years of teaching. Face to face I always call parents by their last names apart from a couple who are friends with Ds and we occasionally see them for play dates.

[iggleypiggly]

chocolatesun I don’t think there is any set rule, and admin staff at schools I’ve never heard of them wanting to be addressed with a title, that’s just bonkers!

[topcat2014]

During a school governors meeting, it is first names.

To other teachers (who I don't tend to see in meetings) Mr, Mrs etc.

Don't tend to do the school run, so doubt many other parents would 'cringe' at me they wouldn't know who I was

[Wait4nothing]

I always offer my first name at parent meetings so that the parent can choose how to address me. I wouldn’t want anyone to feel uncomfortable and sometimes having a first name helps that. Most still use Mrs Wait but our name badges have our first names too so they are there if they want to use them.
I also suspect the lack of email is due to being busy not to name used.

[Unicorndiscoball]

Oh and as a PP said, I would certainly never not reply to an email just because a parent had used my first name! It will be because they are busy trying to do 400 different things!

[donquixotedelamancha]

In that case I think I made a mistake replying to a teacher and calling her by her first name.

Nah, she won't care. It's a bit weird to be called Sir/Madam/Mrs Smith etc, but most of us stick to it because it keeps professional boundaries up.

If your email was less than 72 hours ago, she hasn't replied because she hasn't had PPA yet. If longer than that, she's forgotten because she's run off her feet.

[Maryann1975]

All you teachers would hate me! Or maybe it’s just our school, I don’t know. If there are no children around, I call the teachers by their first names. The majority of them, especially those that have been there a long time call me by my first name. I’m also a childminder so will be doing the school run there forever, I really don’t want to have formality in a place I will be going to twice a day for the next 30 years (I know other childminders who have been going to the same school every day for that length of time).
The teachers also refer to each other by first names in front of me and to me (eg, we’ve been into Rachel’s classroom today and tommy did some really good singing).

[chocolatesun]

Ok, yes I hope it didn’t!