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Should I stay or should I go....

(13 Posts)
Bishybarnybee Wed 15-Mar-17 19:52:15

Inspired by the Fucking Waste Of Space Job thread.......

Am genuinely torn about whether to leave my job in Special Ed (primary, extreme behaviour).

Pros - we have a good staff team, I feel supported and valued by management, I love having flexibility to teach to the children's needs. When it works, it's amazing - we have scope to teach really exciting and enjoyable lessons and it is very satisfying to see them begin to trust, learn, have confidence in themselves. I've invested a lot in this role , have grown in confidence and skill over the years, and can see the potential for me to become really skilled and effective at it. Sometimes we are the best thing in these children's lives and it does make a real difference.

However, the behaviour is extreme and it can be very tough. My partner can't bear seeing me distressed or wiped out after a tough day, and there are a lot of them. Quite serious staff injuries are not uncommon, I have been kicked, punched, bitten and headbutted, leading to some fairly serious injuries at times. We are trained to minimise injury but sometimes it is unavoidable.

But I think I am more bothered by the sense of banging my head against a brick wall when more than half the class are very resistant to learning and just want to spoil it for the ones who do want to learn.

I'm not sure I could bear to go back to mainstream and the restricted curriculum and pressure to show constant progress. But I don't know if this level of stress and frustration is sustainable for me.

Not sure what feedback I'm hoping for here, just wondered if anyone else has experienced similar conflicting feelings of loving and hating a job at the same time and how you resolved it?

Pestilentialone Wed 15-Mar-17 20:05:13

Same conflict going on here.
HoD has asked begged me to delay decision until after Easter.
At least you have senior management onside, talk to them. Sometimes there is a fix.

Bishybarnybee Wed 15-Mar-17 20:10:04

What are the good and bad bits for you, Pest?

FedUpTeacher2 Wed 15-Mar-17 20:10:53

More flowers to both of you.

Pestilentialone Wed 15-Mar-17 20:32:53

Good bits, when the kids actually get it. When they remember something because they can link it to something else. When after years of F is for fail, they get their L1 FS and are proud.

Bad bits, when SMT stand in front of entire staff and say our department is terrible because our attainment is not 75%. National average for our sector is 53% and get 58%, the plonker is on acid......... This is not a thesis, I shall stop now.
Some of the extreme behaviour and parental disinterest bugs me.
But mainly the plonker grin

Pestilentialone Wed 15-Mar-17 20:33:40

we get 58%

Bishybarnybee Wed 15-Mar-17 20:44:33

Yes, got that.......

Where else would you go? Still in teaching?

Pestilentialone Wed 15-Mar-17 20:58:42

Back to engineering.

Pestilentialone Wed 15-Mar-17 21:00:10

What are you considering as an option?
Your skills are highly transferable.

Bishybarnybee Wed 15-Mar-17 21:05:32

Hmm....I would make a good bouncer!

At the moment it feels very much like running from, not to. And I'm not quite ready to give up on it yet. But very close.

Not sure the skills are totally transferable - think I may lack the anal obsession with handwriting, grammar and other such detail needed to thrive in the mainstream these days.

Pestilentialone Wed 15-Mar-17 21:14:08

I would make a good bouncer! grin
You can manage, organise, supervise and do paperwork under extreme pressure to a deadline. Honestly, think hard and wide. Having worked in similar places, you will be a great team member with a quirky sense of humour and the ability to think on your feet or arse .
Don't make a choice in a hurry. Don't undersell yourself.

Bishybarnybee Mon 03-Apr-17 15:49:30

Just wanted to feedback - have a new job!! Teaching related but not teaching. Slight drop in salary but still in the same ballpark.

I didn't think I had much of a chance but got very positive feedback from the interview - really looking forward to starting.

No regrets about my 10 years in teaching but it does feel good to be moving on.

Good luck to all the others contemplating a change ......

FedUpTeacher2 Mon 03-Apr-17 21:36:10

Congratulations! grin good luck with it!

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