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Private or State for your own kids?

(56 Posts)
Bambambini Fri 27-Jan-17 06:51:36

Not a teacher but curious how teachers really feel about this. I've chosen state for my kids - one in yr 10 and one in yr 7. We can afford private but i was really torn and there's none in our town so worried about kids having a slightly longer day on the bus and having no friends locally.

As teachers who really have much more insight to education. Would you choose private or state if you had the choice forvyour own kids and cost wasn't an issue. No grammars here so local schools are very much a mix of abilities and backgrounds.

Worrying that i made the wrong decision, husband was for private.

Merlin40 Fri 27-Jan-17 06:53:28

State. And I've worked with kids from private and state.

Rosieposy4 Fri 27-Jan-17 11:23:22

Depends on the quality of the local state school. If it is a good one ( and i do not necessarily mean ofsted good) then state, if it is crap, with no capacity for improvement then private.
We have done the latter, only state school for some distance, and only one any buses run to, has been RI for last five ofsteds, had more heads than i have had hot dinners this week, results are crap, behaviour poor. No way am i sending my kids there.
If they could go somewhere as good as where i teach then they would be there in a heartbeat.

FartnissEverbeans Fri 27-Jan-17 13:41:38

Same as rosyposy - it depends on the school (and our finances!). I've worked in state schools that I would never in a million years send my child to, and a few I would be desperate to get them into.

The state sector as a whole has better value added, and in my experience generally better teaching, though behavior can be an issue and I haven't experienced that at private schools.

Ponderingprivately Fri 27-Jan-17 13:43:23

I'm just about to start in private, but will be sending DD to a state primary when she goes into reception in September. This is mostly because the school has a good reputation and I am keen for her to make local friends. I might feel differently at secondary level but for now I think this will be the right decision.

Littlefish Fri 27-Jan-17 13:47:37

Dd was at a state school until the end of year 3. We had never, ever considered sending her to a private school. However, she was proving to be talented at both music and sport. We knew that he's absolutely lovely, but tiny state primary could not offer the level of music and sport we wanted for her

Working practically full time as a teacher meant that there was no way to get her to any after school music or sport clubs

None of the nearby larger state schools had any spaces so we made the very difficult decision to move her to a private school

I don't think the standard of teaching is any better in her private school and at times, I think the behavior in the class is probably not as good. However, the sport and music is phenomenal and as a result, dd is so much happier.

Redlocks28 Fri 27-Jan-17 13:54:08

Mine all went to state and then grammar.

To be honest, the private schools around here are pretty poor anyway. Anyone who is bright goes to grammar so the private school results are not good and they seem to have some weak teachers and be poorly organised. Last year, my friends daughter got to two weeks before the submission date for the art gcse only to find the teacher was sacked because she'd taught them all the wrong syllabus. It's was a complete shambles!

monkeysox Fri 27-Jan-17 14:21:08

How do you think most teachers would afford private schooling?
Unattainable on teachers wages.
Would feel wrong too. Working as part of state ed system but that system not good enough for your own kids?

Jessesbitch Sat 28-Jan-17 14:14:35

I teach in a private school. 1 child state 1 private. Each the right school for them.

BizzyFizzy Sat 28-Jan-17 14:31:10

All five of mine went to private schools. No regrets at all.

70ontheinside Sat 28-Jan-17 14:36:49

As above, totally depends on what the local schools are like.
I would never let my kids go to the school I teach in. Luckily we live in catchment for an absolutely amazing comp, and that's where they'll be going and where I really want to teach

Msdinosaur Sat 28-Jan-17 14:39:03

State primary here but I would love her to go to private secondary if DH will agree!

Bambambini Sat 28-Jan-17 14:48:11

Thanks all. Guess i'm looking for some kind of confirmation that i didn't make a bad choice from teachers who actually know what state and private schools are like.

don't even know if moving them to private would be a doable option. So hard to know you are making the tight choices as you can't do reruns with another choice.

MrsGuyOfGisbo Sat 28-Jan-17 15:48:02

My PGCE tutor warned us against getting NQT jobs in indies - it was the party line for the uni, and lots of pressure on peeps not to apply to them.
She admitted to me privately that she would send her own DC to indies when they got to secondary age as state in her borough were dire, but on principle she would never teach in one herself confused

BizzyFizzy Sat 28-Jan-17 18:38:03

PGCE tutors tend to be a bit leftie, in a "Diane Abbott" way.

Lowdoorinthewal1 Sat 28-Jan-17 18:45:28

Nobody knows the ins and outs of all state schools or all independent schools!

Every school has to be judged on a) its own merits and b) how good of a fit it is for an individual child.

Choose a school, not a sector.

Badbadbunny Sat 28-Jan-17 19:48:00

Impossible to generalise. Every school is different. We regularly have the arguments between:-

Grammar v comp
Single sex v co ed
Private v state

Never any conclusive answers because not all state schools are the same, not all privates are the same, not all grammars are the same, etc.

You have to look at your local choices, and then you have to think about each child's strenghts/weaknesses, preferences, abilities, etc.

WyfOfBathe Sat 28-Jan-17 20:47:03

I taught in a private school for a year - although in a different country - and I really didn't enjoy it. I don't think that the students were getting a better education than if they were at a state school, and I had a few students who definitely had unrealistic views of the world. But that's only a sample of one school.

I now teach in a state school and my DD goes to a state school. We're lucky to live in an area with good state schools, and DD's primary school offers a range of after school activities which I know not every school does or can afford to do. If we lived in an area where the state schools were appalling, I suppose I might look into indies.

Lowdoorinthewal1 Sun 29-Jan-17 07:57:15

I will say that my DH has taught in 5 different independent schools and I have taught in 5 different state schools. These have been all around the South of England as we have moved for career opportunities.

My DS goes to an independent school. This choice is largely based on the extra-curricular opportunities. The longer days with built in good quality sports and arts activities enable us to both work full time without him missing out. He still does about an extra 5hrs of activity out of school in 'his' particular sport, but I couldn't recreate the breadth of stuff he takes part in at school myself and work full time as a Teacher.

PotteringAlong Sun 29-Jan-17 08:03:31


Again, I've taught in state schools that I would not send my children to and schools I'd really want them to go to.

nuttyknitter Sun 29-Jan-17 08:17:36

Morally indefensible if you think state schools are good enough to teach in but not good enough for your own children.

prettywhiteguitar Sun 29-Jan-17 08:26:16

Private and work in private. The problem in our area is that the great secondary schools are in expensive housing areas which we would never be able to get a mortgage for. The area we lived in the secondary was failing and had new head after new head.

We moved into private sector as ds is dyslexic and was hating school, now he's thriving but that's because of he type of school it is, arty and liberal. He would not suit the other private schools in the area.

We are lucky we can afford it and send him otherwise he would just have slipped through the cracks.

Lowdoorinthewal1 Sun 29-Jan-17 08:34:50

if you think state schools are good enough to teach in but not good enough for your own children

I don't think anybody has said that? confused

MaggieRhee Sun 29-Jan-17 09:24:37

Myself and dH are both teachers in the state sector and we are sending our dc private. Not all state schools (and private) are of equal quality, or general ethos etc. We would send them to our local state primary but the catchment has shrunk to under 250m. There is another one we like but we won't get into that either. The one we will likely get is 'good' but we didn't like the ethos, feel of the school, lessons we observed or the head. We loved the private. I would send them to the state schools we work at. I would send them to others in the area. There are some I wouldn't want to send them to in a millions years. Equally there are some private schools we discounted to. Schools are so different, there are both private and state schools that I wouldn't want to work in either. If I could actually choose I would pick our local nearest state. The reality is I can't so we are paying to attend the school we think is best.

AutumnEve Sun 29-Jan-17 09:45:45

State. I went to a private school and always I thought I would send my kids to do the same but since teaching both private and state schools I've changed my mind.
Some private schools can spoon feed their pupils too much and they the kids don't learn to fend for themselves.

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