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Been sworn at

(15 Posts)
Lookout2017 Tue 03-Jan-17 16:54:44

Regular poster, NC for this.

Work in school, support staff in management. Do duty regularly (weekly).

Today, during my duty, student pushed in the queue. Was asked politely to move back. Stood where they were and said 'I'm not fucking doing that'.

Completely refused to do as they were asked. I followed the school procedure of reporting and was assured it would be dealt with (and have great confidence it will be).

But - any advice as to how to deal with this on the spot?

Any good lines I can use if it happens again (Year 11 so a testing group!)?

OP’s posts: |
Awkward77 Tue 03-Jan-17 16:59:29

I usually remind them that I'm not their mother and so they have no right to talk to me like that.😁

BeanAnTi Tue 03-Jan-17 16:59:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Olivo Tue 03-Jan-17 20:28:22

I usually say "I beg your pardon?" Whereupon they either repeat ( and clearly don't care that they will be suspended) or they apologise and it is logged but we move on. Make sure you pass it on as soon as you can though. I ma head of year 11 and it is. Tricky to pick things up too much later. The students have very short term memories it seems!

FuzzyWizard Wed 04-Jan-17 06:50:11

In my school they would be taken immediately to the nearest SLT office (just outside the dining hall) and told to wait there to be dealt with and I would fill out an incident slip. SLT would sort out an appropriate punishment.

Ditsyprint40 Thu 05-Jan-17 13:43:14

I would report to SLT or behaviour staff immediately. In our school they would be picked up and potentially isolated for this kind of incident. As a minimum they'd be removed from the situation,otherwise other children have seen them undermine you. It's refusing to follow instructions and foul language.

Lookout2017 Thu 05-Jan-17 17:10:07

Thanks for your responses.

I am by myself in the duty area, SLT do come round but weren't there at that specific time. Next time I will leave and go and find someone, agree with the undermining. I did report when I got back to my office and also mentioned it to their HoH who said they would be internally excluded for it.

The vast majority of students are great, and SLT are really supportive but it's just how to deal with it on the spot.

I think I said something pitiful like 'you're not supposed to talk like that to staff'! blush

OP’s posts: |
youarenotkiddingme Thu 05-Jan-17 17:34:59

In would ask SLT if you can be given 'permission' to set an agreed consequence I'd you are alone.

But do keep reporting. My Ds swears at school (home - anywhere!)
Not so much as the defiant tact but because he has asd and just gets overwhelmed. It actually annoys me that it's just left that he's taken to calm down. If it was logged then a true picture of how much he struggles at school would be collated.

The reason 'some' pupils do and say it is because although they may get a consequence later on at that time they get kudos from their mates. (Iyswim?) the power to immediately deal with it takes the reason / opportunity away from them.

Ditsyprint40 Thu 05-Jan-17 19:46:24

That is a good idea, to go and get SLT. What you really need is a radio! Do SLT/other duty staff use these?

OneOfTheGrundys Thu 05-Jan-17 20:00:24

Ive always used "Don't speak to me like that. I don't like it and it is rude." Wrt the not following instructions "You've been asked repeatedly to do X. You've refused to follow my reasonable request. I can't sanction thus behaviour at the moment - I'm on duty - but we'll deal with this later." And do of course deal with it!
Mind you, after the day I've had I don't feel in any position to advise about behaviour! 😉

youarenotkiddingme Thu 05-Jan-17 20:49:44

Well I doubt any of you have had to use the phrase "I've asked you to stop eating the paper money 3 times now" (to a 16 yo!!!!)

DanyellasDonkey Fri 06-Jan-17 14:01:16

Sadly this is a regular occurrence in our school. When a pupil is asked to move and they refuse, they have been known to say, "Make me" - and there's not a lot you can do,

TheSnowFairy Fri 06-Jan-17 16:37:42

Danyella do you have SLT backup?

DanyellasDonkey Fri 06-Jan-17 22:52:53

SnowFairy They more or less say the same to SLT - we have a youngish female HT and DHT and the kids have very little respect for them. It's a pretty shit situation atm and little chance of escape sad. Pity as this used to be a great school.

DailyMailDontStealMyThread Fri 06-Jan-17 23:06:55

youare I'm in the same position. DD has sn and struggles. I feel for the teachers and the other pupils. I need the school to pick their battles and be consistent but I appreciate it is very hard, any approach of "I beg your pardon" or "that is not acceptable, get to the end of the line" will always be met with "don't talk to me like that" or "what you going to do about it"

She can be the kindest, most helpful and kind child you get in class but My God, can she also be strong willed, oppiniated, rude, nasty and down right a pain in the arse and I love her so sorry teachers flowers

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