Hello,
I'm posting this in the hope that someone can help me or offer some advise. I have a young daughter and I'm a primary school teacher. I have only been teaching for 3 years but have been at the same school feeling unhappy since my NQT year. I barely have any time with my daughter (I can barely keep up with the expectations the SMT have and find I think about work all the time) and although I have tried to leave before, each time I have been guilt-tripped, told I'm not good enough to go anyway else or offered SMT promotions despite those not being something I am interested in anymore. This year I feel like my job is affecting my mental health, there have been circumstances in my personal life as well as my job that have led me to very depressed. I am seeing a therapist but I feel like my happiness isn't improving because I spend all day in an environment that is so toxic. The school is a negative place, most people are unhappy because the head teacher does not value anybody and often does or says things that are rude at at worst, bullying. I feel like the DHT has bullied me since I started, it was particularly bad in my NQT year but on occasion, she still does her best to intimidate me by getting into my personal space and shouting in my face. I have tried to contact my union previously but didn't find them very helpful and decided it was better to get my head down and make as little noise as possible. Every time I feel like I can't possibly do anymore, there is another initiative dumped on us. The SMT are obsessed with OFSTED to the point where we have lost sight of the children as young people not as numbers. The only reason I have made it so far is an incredibly supportive husband who never gets cross when he finds me in floods of tears/feeling completely shattered.
I want to leave and I have applied for a job outside of teaching however the interview is not until after half-term. I can't imagine having to stay here until Easter but equally I feel guilty about leaving my class and know that the SMT will make my life hell. That's why so far I have taken the easy option of just staying there. I feel like the head doesn't know how I truly feel, I do a very good job of projecting a happy image when around SMT and my class. Do I have to resign on Wednesday or can I send in my resignation in half-term before the 31st? I am tempting to wait to hear if I have an interview before handing in my notice but that will probably be in half term as the interview is early November. Trying to negotiate out of my contact after the 31st seems daunting especially as I have seen the SMT make the life of others who have gone off sick/left difficult.
I don't know what to do and I feel sick with worry. I appreciate any advice you might have.
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Feeling trapped!
9 replies
Mummytoo1 · 19/10/2015 18:57
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