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When you don't like a child...

(22 Posts)
roisin Wed 14-Jan-15 21:54:16

.. for goodness sake, don't let it show.

And in particular don't let it show at parents' evening! If all the other teachers have been saying dc is a joy to teach, it just reflects really badly on you, if you clearly don't understand him.

and it doesn't matter if they're 5 or 15.

BoneyBackJefferson Thu 15-Jan-15 06:41:26

Are you actually posting about teachers "disliking" a child or having a child that is not working as well in a particular class/for a particular teacher?

Asleeponasunbeam Thu 15-Jan-15 06:45:12

Please don't post in staffroom to complain about one particular teacher. It just reflects badly on you.

geebie Thu 15-Jan-15 06:54:13

Interesting topic, but more detail needed please if you want teachers to actually be able to comment....

TheTroubleWithAngels Thu 15-Jan-15 18:09:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mrscumberbatch Thu 15-Jan-15 18:12:40

I don't think this is the right place to post it OP but I do agree with you.

I had a great relationship with most of my teachers growing up. Mutual respect and obedience on my part but one teacher really made my life a misery.
(I was a bit weird. Bit of a history nerd and didn't really fit in. This doesn't excuse her behaviour though. )

Ohmygrood Thu 15-Jan-15 19:19:03

Roisin is a teacher I think, so probably looking at it from different perspectives.

I agree with her op though (as a teacher and a parent).

roisin Thu 15-Jan-15 20:40:51

Sorry, didn't realise there was an etiquette for posting on this board. Will bow out now.

Skatingfastonthinice Thu 15-Jan-15 20:46:49

Depends, how did the teacher show she disliked your DS?
Did she pick out specific areas and issues that needed to change? Or was she entirely negative about him and when you asked for some positive points for development, she just shrugged?
Or was she just unenthusiastic about him, rather than the bouncy, positive tail-wagging delight that some parents expect?

Skatingfastonthinice Thu 15-Jan-15 20:52:45

I shouldn't have assumed that the teacher was female. blush

noblegiraffe Thu 15-Jan-15 20:58:03

Some kids piss around and are a pain in the arse in certain subjects that they don't like, and it's nothing to do with the teacher liking them or not.

I had a parent come to parents evening brandishing a poor maths report wondering why the rest of the report was wonderful. I must be picking on her DD. Luckily I was able to show the exercise book with the scrappy work, the homework record with the missing homeworks and the improvement shown in as a result of my 'nagging' which made it obvious that the problem was not me.

isitsnowingyet Thu 15-Jan-15 20:59:14

Bouncy, positive tail-wagging delight that some parents expect confused

PenelopePitstops Thu 15-Jan-15 21:00:41

What noble said

MuddhaOfSuburbia Thu 15-Jan-15 21:07:53

as a parent am a bit old school on this

say I get glowing reports for dcs from most teachers, and a hmm from a few others, I assume it's because they (dcs) don't like the subject/don't apply themselves/dick around/disrupt others, rather than that the teacher doesn't like or get them

roisin Thu 15-Jan-15 21:16:28

OK, can't resist.

I worked in secondary for 8 yrs, I know what kids are like. I am also very old school and am under no illusions about my kids. I've been going to parents' evenings for 14 yrs, so I know what they're like too.

ds1 is doing extraordinarily well in all subjects, including this one. He has 3 teachers for this particular subject and has been complaining about this teacher at home all term. We've been backing the teacher to the hilt, reminding him to be polite, respectful, etc; assuring him of the teacher's competence and assuring him that she didn't dislike him.

However, at parents' evening it was blatantly clear that everything he had related to us is true.

So I return to my earlier assertion: as a teacher (it is inevitable that you will come across children that you dislike, however) it is very unprofessional to show this. And doing so will not help you in your job, which is to teach and inspire the pupils.

Quitethewoodsman Thu 15-Jan-15 22:57:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

chilephilly Fri 16-Jan-15 07:05:56

As others have said, some kids go out of their way to piss about. They talk over the teacher, are rude when asked to stop, do very little work. There is nothing worse than watching a lesson you've spent time preparing go down the pan because of a couple of Those kids.
It is very difficult indeed to like kids like that.
BUT there is no excuse for being unprofessional.
(I'm a secondary teacher of 23 years experience. Just off to the Fun Factory now! grin )

MirandaWest Fri 16-Jan-15 07:21:16

I somehow suspect that roisin's DS1 does get on with his work given what he has attained (am not a stalker but I have read other threads that roisin has posted on).

thecatfromjapan Fri 16-Jan-15 18:44:44

Roisin, some people lack social skills; some of those work in schools. There is no point, my love, in your OP, other than to let off steam. The people who can't hold it together enough to act professionally in dealing with young people and their parents are not the sort of people who will have the self-awareness to a. Recognise themselves in this b. Reflect and change.
I think you'd bd better just having a rant.
And maybe telling your child that some people abuse their positions of trust and authority, and that not everyone in authority is deserving of unquestioning respect.
If your child is 17, this is a lesson they are well able to handle by now. How to deal with these situations is a life-skill I'm still learning. Maybe he's lucky to come across this situation whilst he has you to discuss it with him.
And you have my sympathy: I had a bullying teacher when I was young. I'm a lovely person but a little bit of me wants to find her grave and piss on it!!! Even though I realise that is quite irrational: she's beyond feelings of insult at such inane desecration. Even so, abuse when powerless is an awful thing to experience.

balia Fri 16-Jan-15 18:51:55

Do you think it would be less passive aggressive to email her, or ask if your DS could be moved into a different class, or discuss it with a more senior member of staff?

MuddhaOfSuburbia Fri 16-Jan-15 19:03:14

This is unusual ime. Even teachers who appear quite-ahem-IRRITATED by dcs still give the impression that they like themes

This teacher sounds like they're being an arsehole. Can ds grin and bear it?

BoneyBackJefferson Fri 16-Jan-15 20:30:57

"However, at parents' evening it was blatantly clear that everything he had related to us is true."

that is pretty impressive in a 5 minute meeting.

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