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Decision made - I NEED to leave

(70 Posts)
BobPatSamandIgglePiggle Thu 13-Feb-14 23:02:11

After 13 years in teaching I've finally admitted that I need to leave. I've taught across a massive range of ages and abilities and I used to love it.

I feel that the passion, enthusiasm and, to be honest, interest has gone. I hate it.

It's making me anxious and ill. I never get any quality time with ds. I hate it.

I am handing my notice in at Easter whether I have another job or not.

This will affect everything - ds' nursery - everything. I'm terrified but I honestly can't cope any longer in this awful, awful 'profession'

Not sure why I'm posting - maybe tp make it feel more real?

PolyesterBride Thu 13-Feb-14 23:05:22

Oh no, I don't have any wise words but I noticed that you wrote 'I hate it' twice in your op so you've probably made the right decision! Good luck with your job hunt.

LizzieVereker Thu 13-Feb-14 23:10:04

I'm sorry to hear you feel this way about a job you used to love. Do you want to talk through what's making you miserable, or did you just want to tell us you've made your decision?

Either way, good luck, and I'm sure everything will turn out for the best thanks

BobPatSamandIgglePiggle Thu 13-Feb-14 23:11:11

I almost wrote it at the end of every sentence :-(

Sat through a staff meeting tonight where we were berated (by a non teaching manager) for a poor internal inspection (carried out by 1 non teaching manager)

We have a really good team and a fantastic team grade profile but were vilified for ridiculous reasons.

It was the straw that broke the camels back.

Misslaughalot Thu 13-Feb-14 23:15:03

I felt the same as you a few years ago and handed in my notice at the Easter holiday without another job to go to. Hands down the best decision I ever made, and I'm in a job I love now (education related).

It was the right thing to do for me, but I appreciate it isn't for everyone. Not having another job to go to was scary, but I had supportive people around me, and would reassure myself that I could probably get another teaching job if I really couldn't find anything else. It really made me work hard to find a new job, and I did do some supply teaching in the September and October of that year, which worked out well as it meant I could start my new job straight away, without them having to wait for me to work out my notice.

Good luck with your future!

BobPatSamandIgglePiggle Thu 13-Feb-14 23:22:06

Thanks - I worked supply about a hundred years ago when I first qualified so will get in touch with my old agency as a backup. I really need to get out altogether but could do it at a push.

I broke down when I got home and admitted that I hate it to the point it's making my chest hurt. We'll really struggle but dh can see how bad it is and says we'll juat have to manage.

I'm a rough, tough northerner who doesn't usually do tears so he knew I was serious!

ninah Thu 13-Feb-14 23:26:08

well you have managed a lot longer than me! 18 months has led me to the same decision.
I plan to regroup, do supply in other schools if I can for experience, and take it from there.
Couple of questions - when applying for work, if you do, what would you give as reason for leaving? and is your school giving you a hard time for going before the summer, cos mine is?

somedizzywhore1804 Thu 13-Feb-14 23:31:22

Feeling the same OP. Been a teacher for 7 years. Having my first baby in July and can't see myself ever going back. I hate and dread it. It's not about the kids, it's about the endless targets, telling off from people who spend no time in the classroom and pointless paper shuffling.

BobPatSamandIgglePiggle Thu 13-Feb-14 23:32:06

I've only just decided tonight so they don't know yet.

I have no idea where I'll be looking (maybe shops??) Or what I'll tell them! Everything is terrifying - we're skint now and I honestly don't know how we'll manage on a lower wage but I really think I'll be heading for a breakdown if I stay

ninah Thu 13-Feb-14 23:35:56

that's how I feel
in a 3 school, being told so many different/conflicting things, nightmare jobshare, loads of staff leaving
it's leave on my feet now or in a padded van by summer

BobPatSamandIgglePiggle Thu 13-Feb-14 23:40:15

Sorry some of you feel the same - it's truly soul destroying. I used to love it so much :-(

GoodnessIsThatTheTime Thu 13-Feb-14 23:49:47

Well done on the decision. And good luck in the hunt. It's such an emotional thing to do isn't it?

I'm looking at whether to go back to teaching and reading threads on here really make me question it - but I'm still not sure where else to look. Your confidence really takes a hit doesn't it?

BobPatSamandIgglePiggle Fri 14-Feb-14 07:11:06


Goodness - that was the main reason for the tears last night - I don't have the confidence that another employer will want me :-(

I'll sort something though - pma and all that!

guggenheim Fri 14-Feb-14 08:01:57

hi, I'm going at easter- hooray! The current stupidity has finished me off.

bobPat you will be more than fine,you will get your life back and find something you are happy doing.I'm going to go back to doing supply work which I really enjoy and look about for something completely different from teaching too.

You are highly organised,creative,hard working,able to manage large groups and adults,can cope with stress,able to assess, loads of empathy etc etc. All teachers can do this and more,please tell me why you won't be able to find a new employer with all those skills?????

In the highly unlikely situation of not being able to find a post you love then how about this: start a business and be your own boss, train to do something new.

You will be fine once you have had time to rest and put the stupidity behind you. Hope you don't mind me posting but it makes me sad that teachers think they don't have skills for anything other than teaching.
Sorry for any typos my toddler is hanging over the top of my laptop..sigh.

GoodnessIsThatTheTime Fri 14-Feb-14 11:29:43

It's hard to know where to start looking isn't it? It seems a lot of people go onto big companies from graduation and work up.

Is like a professional level job that pays at least similar, as my husband is a low earner...

But where to look? Most jobs arent advertised and I don't have an old boys network!

ormirian Fri 14-Feb-14 11:44:30

H is in the same boat. From being a disgustingly healthy man who shed stress like water of a duck's back, he has become a wreck. I thnik he needs to consider depression medication - I've been depressed on and off most of my life and I recognise the symptoms.

HT is new and basically sees the school as a problem that needing fixing despite the children and parents being very happy with it. Ofsted aren't happy so therefore parents' opinions' don't matter. She had more or less said 'if you don't like it leave! It'll clear the deadwood'. Sad thing is that at of the 3 teachers have left the school in the last 18 months, not one of them could remotely be described as 'dead wood'. They were the most experienced, most enlightened and successful teachers. Soon there will be no teachers under about 25 years old or with more than a year or so experience - but at least they will deal with the paperwork better.

I give H another year tops. It sucks! So sorry OP x

BobPatSamandIgglePiggle Fri 14-Feb-14 12:05:12

I'm so sad that so many feel this way. I hppe everyone who needs to gets out before depression hits.

Without blowing my trumpet I am, or used to be, a good teacher. Always been graded good or outstanding. Same for most of my colleagues yet every meeting / email / training session tells us we're not good enough.

There is no discipline where I am. Students rule the place and some staff feel they are being bullied by teenagers.

Sorry for ranting - its my day off but my insides are churning thinking about it.

GoodnessIsThatTheTime Fri 14-Feb-14 12:08:28

I'm good with people but I'd really like something more admin/cerebral but not sure what. I'm good at exams but you don't get paid for that! I like researching. Really feel at a loss. Having spent early career being in demand, and sailing thru school and uni with ease its so hard being at sea not knowing the next step isnt it?

Misslaughalot Fri 14-Feb-14 12:37:05

The skills that you have as a teacher are highly transferable to other professions. I found my job in the 'other workplaces' section of TES jobs, it's always worth a look there as there can be some really interesting education related jobs appear.

I've also not ruled out ever returning to teaching, but things would have to change drastically at the DfE before that happens!

MrsBazinga Fri 14-Feb-14 14:18:04

Well done. And good luck. It is a terrifying and liberating experience. I did the same last Easter. Had been teaching for 15 years, but the last year brought me to my knees and made me fear for my mental and physical health. Handed in notice with no job to go to simply because I couldn't face another week in that place.

The good news is that I then did supply for a couple of terms, and discovered that some schools are still managing to have a caring, positive, supportive ethos where it comes to their staff, and I'm now doing a part time teaching job in a great school, and loving it. I am still thinking about ways out of teaching, or at least class teaching, as ideally I'd like to work full time, but for me it seems impossible to have any semblance of a normal balanced family life with the work load that is involved in teaching.

DriftingOff Fri 14-Feb-14 18:56:03

I also left last Easter and it was one of the best life decisions I've ever made. I loved teaching for years, and worked full time when my eldest was pre-school, but then I had my second child, and, whereas with my eldest, I was desperate to go back to work, with my second, I didn't really want to go back - anyway I did, thinking it was just nerves, but I actually felt worse once I got back into work. So much had changed in the year I was off - new government, new HT. In hindsight, I should have just done my 12 weeks to keep my maternity leave and then left, but I kept thinking my old spark would come back. However, things got even worse, and after a lot of changes in the school, I basically became a victim of work-place bullying (cutting a very long story short). I put up with it for a year and a half before I saw the light and left last year. I still have flashbacks and nightmares about what happened. My initial intention was to find another (part-time) job, not because I needed the money, but because I've worked since I was 15, and couldn't get my head round the idea of not having a 'proper' job. I'm a 'high-flyer' and felt I ought to have proper career, and felt I was wasting my education. In the end, through choice, I've not bothered getting another job, and I'm loving being a SAHM. I can spend all the time I want with my kids. The only thing I miss is the intellectual challenge, so I do have my eye on various options to fill this gap. I may go back to teaching, I may not, I'll decide when I'm ready.

Sorry, that's turned into a really long post!

GoodnessIsThatTheTime Fri 14-Feb-14 20:34:14

Yes to the high flyer thing. I need a job now as husband's income is low and its odd no longwr beong in the golden girl world of high flying!

HSMMaCM Sat 15-Feb-14 11:01:56

I was watching uk border patrol the other day and one of them is an ex teacher.

Don't discount anything.

chosenone Sun 16-Feb-14 09:19:30

Bobcat ...good luck with whatever you decide to do and wherever you go next. There are still options in some schools ? Not academies. Schools doing well ? I agree the pressure is everywhere though and your health must come first. The Idea of non teaching managers absolutely makes my blood boil ! Please if you do anything say this in your leaving speech. 'This job has changed beyond recognition from the rewarding well respected job it was at the start of my career, targets, data and ofsted rule the roost and the genuine needs of the children and a passion for teaching your subject are long gone.....I mean managers who have never.even. taught!!!! Who'd have though it, so with education in the state its out !!!
Good luck

BobPatSamandIgglePiggle Mon 17-Feb-14 17:39:28

Thanks everyone - it's good to hear that there is life outside teaching. A 'training day' today has made me sure of my decision. One colleague asked a really relevant question and was told that the trainer qasnt taking questions as he had a lot to get through! He was 'training' us on lesson observation strategies.

chosen I'm in FE so no opportunity for a leaving speech but I will be requesting a meeting with HR and will write to the principal amd board pf governors.

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