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Advice needed, oh catty ones.

(32 Posts)
OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow Thu 21-Feb-19 19:13:07

My adult DS lives in another city a few counties from us (relevant) Last year he got a kitten, all was well. Come this year he has had a very acrimonious breakup with his flat mate, and had to hurriedly move out. He's moved in with another mate, but he is unable to take kitty. Currently he is in hiding at my dd's (not allowed pets). We (my dh) can't take him, because distance and also we have a 6month old puppy who has never met a cat. Kitty hasn't met any other animal, he's a house cat. He's neutered. Dd can't have cat forever. Ds can't move out yet, (new job,shit credit rating due to fm sticking him with bills) and even if he does doubtful he'd get a let that allows animals. It's a mess. He loves that cat and is reluctant to give him up to a shelter. (He's black, notoriously hard to rehome)
Anyone got any bright (non judgmental, it really isn't his fault) idea So?

OP’s posts: |
thecatneuterer Thu 21-Feb-19 19:23:41

There are house shares that allow pets. Houseshares don't normally bother with credit checks and if they do could you be a guarantor? Tell him to look on Spareroom. They have a filter to find pet-friendly rooms.

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow Thu 21-Feb-19 19:29:51

Thanks for your tip CN. To be honest, he's still quite shell shocked by the whole thing (abuse doesn't always happen between partners) and he's just grateful to have a roof over his head, but I'll put it to him.

OP’s posts: |
GiveMyHeadPeaceffs Thu 21-Feb-19 19:45:04

Not ideal but cats and dogs can share the same space. While it's not perfect you could take the cat until your ds gets sorted.

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow Thu 21-Feb-19 19:55:46

It'd be a logistic nightmare, ds hasn't a car, so we would have to drive to collect him. Would take two people, dh rightly says one person and cat in carrier for three hours is not good. We always had cats, but decided not to get a dog until we were cat less as it wouldn't be fair. Dh says it wouldn't be fair on the pup or the cat. Gaah, it's tough.

OP’s posts: |
smartcarnotsosmartdriver Thu 21-Feb-19 19:58:27

I really feel for him. We managed to find a flat that would allow our cat we went unfurnished as I think the main worry with cats is that they scratch the furniture. I however have the biggest soft spot for black cats so I totally understand his anguish. There must be something that can be done?

Decormad38 Thu 21-Feb-19 20:02:24

Our dog and cat get on really well.

WeaselsRising Thu 21-Feb-19 20:02:40

Where in the country is he? Some places foster cats till their owners can take them back.

viccat Thu 21-Feb-19 20:11:05

A young black cat without behavioural problems won't be so hard to home if he rehomes through a charity. Just choose the charity well (only approach the ones with a solid euthanasia policy basically and steer clear of the RSPCA...).

Otherwise, as cat and your dog are both young, it's not impossible to introduce them if you are willing to do it. Three hours in a carrier is nothing in the scheme of things, people move house with cats all the time and have a long drive.

Frlrlrubert Thu 21-Feb-19 20:14:28

Personally I'd go get the cat. Both dog and cat are young. Cat is indoor so you can stairgate off upstairs so they have separate space. They'll be fine.

SIL and her middle aged cat moved in with MIL and her middle aged (large) dogs and they made it work.

A day trip to save rehoming someone's pet wouldn't even phase me.

Fluffycloudland77 Thu 21-Feb-19 20:20:38

We used to take 4 cats on holiday in carriers for a 3hr journey. I’d go get him too. He’s family.

Toddlerteaplease Thu 21-Feb-19 21:39:32

Can't see why you can't take the cat. As long as you introduce the cat and dog slowly abs carefully. It may well be fine. The cat will put the dog in its place.

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow Thu 21-Feb-19 21:49:09

Dh, who is generally the mildest (and easily manipulated by his dc) of men, has stuck to his guns and won't have the cat.
Whoever asked, he's in Manchester, so if anyone knows any fosters there I'd be grateful.

OP’s posts: |
smartcarnotsosmartdriver Thu 21-Feb-19 21:50:02

To be fair my skittish cat moved house on a 3 and a half hour drive and she was completely fine.

MrsCatE Thu 21-Feb-19 21:59:32

Hello @OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow! <waves madly>. Well done on finding the 2nd best thread on MN wink wink say no more, taps nose, winks again.

Please follow sage advice above. I am not worthy. My cat would kill anything below 8 stone. I am small but have developed cake and cheese habit to ensure I survive.

Balloondog Fri 22-Feb-19 08:17:41

I'm not sure what the problem with a 3 hour drive is or why it would require 2 people? We've moved countries and the cats have had to be in carriers for up to 24 hours and alone in aircraft cargo - they've all always been fine, zero side effects and happy to get extra treats when they reach the new house!

YetAnotherSpartacus Fri 22-Feb-19 12:19:29

I think that DH needs to be leaned on. How about "it's the cat or you alone in a sad bedsit --with the puppy--"

HuggedtheRedwoods Fri 22-Feb-19 19:55:59

Wouldn't be cheap for long term but maybe a cattery? Perhaps suggesting that you could pay to help your son out might help with persuading DH to give puppy & kitty a trial run?

viccat Fri 22-Feb-19 21:23:50

If you really can't take the cat and your DS doesn't have any plans to move in the immediate future, your best bet may be finding a friend or relative who wants to have a temporary cat and can in effect foster, maybe if you cover vet bills, food etc.? Charities are unlikely to have the capacity to help if there is no defined end point in sight and a cattery is not great for long term (the pens are quite small really and the cats don't get much interaction compared to living in a home situation).

smartcarnotsosmartdriver Sat 23-Feb-19 16:39:21

Any update OP? How's the wee cat?

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow Sat 23-Feb-19 19:16:04

He may be able to find a friend to have him for a bit(he's hoping to move in late august/September) but, Lordy me he's not very proactive. Dd would keep him but she finishes uni this year and won't be there much after end of April. I'm going to push him a bit tomorrow. Catteries are a no go, we can't afford it and he can't.

OP’s posts: |
timtam23 Sat 23-Feb-19 22:58:26

He could ask on the Facebook page for South Manchester Rehome and Rescue. They may not be able to take the cat themselves but they may be able to assist him with fostering advice/homechecks. Millstream animal sanctuary (in Droylsden)and the Society for Abandoned Animals (in Sale) are good local cat sanctuaries but they are usually full to the rafters. I hope you can persuade your DH to take the cat though.

Haffdonga Sat 23-Feb-19 23:14:39

Why on earth do you think cats and dogs can't live together? I've always had one of each and with careful introductions they can very easily learn to be mates. It's ideal to introduce your dog to family cat while still a puppy.

Fluffycloudland77 Sun 24-Feb-19 07:32:09

Do you think he’s hoping dad will relent?.

My dad said no to a 3rd cat 31 years ago & my mums still pissed with him “mum, what was that silver tabbies name again?” Mum <daggers at dad>.

thecatneuterer Sun 24-Feb-19 12:17:25

You won't find any rescues to foster in this situation. They need all the space they have for desperate cases that come in constantly. Most would almost certainly be able to help to rehome - but the advice above that some sort of long term foster may be found is just pie in the sky unfortunately.

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