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Anyone else have a non cuddly cat?

(37 Posts)
QueenOfIce Tue 27-Feb-18 00:59:20

I read all these lovely stories about cats who love to snuggle, neither of mine do unless you're in bed. Girl cat will come to bed with us and curl up in any available space between your legs, behind knees..boy cat will once in a blue moon lie on your lap for all of 5 mins then bugger off again.

They're both quite affectionate but they don't snuggle, I have cat cuddle envy envy anyone else have cats who just don't give a shit about how much you love them or want a cuddle?

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Kerberos Tue 27-Feb-18 01:05:10

Yep. He's a bit feral. He had a hard start in life so I forgive him for being a bastard. Occasionally he'll grace us with his attention then goes back to being a bastard again. I still love him...

Inthetropics Tue 27-Feb-18 01:16:23

My girl cat Cookie is like this and she is the flufier cat ever! It's sooo hard! Sometimes she comes near me when she is sleepy and will ask for a cuddle but doesn't actually tolerate it for more than 2 seconds. I have massive cat cuddle envy (will be stealing this expression!).

QueenOfIce Tue 27-Feb-18 01:19:55

Oh she is very cute inthe I'm not surprised you have cuddle envy if she won't snuggle!

If boy cat is hungry at 4am he'll lie on my pillow usually with his arse in my face as he knows I don't like it and will get up pretty quickly to feed him. My cats are bastards.

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EachandEveryone Tue 27-Feb-18 01:21:22

My Dolly cant stand to be contained. I can only stroke her when shes nodding off. I wonder if its if theyve had a bad start to life? I rescued her at 16 weeks but maybe they dont forget. My other one will come to me all the time to be picked up. She wont come and sleep on my knee though. Im not bothered about that as i would feel bad disturbing them.

SuperBeagle Tue 27-Feb-18 01:24:00

My old cat was like that. She'd happily sleep at the foot of the bed, and very rarely you'd get her sitting on your lap of an evening, but she was certainly the stereotypical aloof cat. She spent most of the day outside lazing about in the sun, and would even disappear for days on end next door where her other owner (not really) lived. He'd feed her and write letters to us about her. We think he must either have had very low cat affection standards or she liked him more than us. grin

We have a 14-ish week old rescue kitten now who is much cuddlier. We were concerned he was feral, as he was found wandering the streets, but the rescue assured us he wasn't feral, and they must be right, as he's been a lovely cat from the second we brought him home. It's a whole new world for me, as I've never owned any cat other than my last one!

esk1mo Tue 27-Feb-18 01:24:33

i have a tortie & can only cuddle her when i pick her up. she would sleep on me as a kitten, but she shows her affection in other ways like massages, or lying next to you.

i wish she was cuddly but she stopped lying on me after about 7-8 months old sad

EachandEveryone Tue 27-Feb-18 01:33:12

Here’s my tortie waiting for me to turn the light off. She will cuddle with her sister but doesn’t give me the time of day.

QueenOfIce Tue 27-Feb-18 01:41:48

Rude cats! Ours are lovely and like to be in our company but no cuddles! We don't pick them up as I've always felt that if they want to jump up they will. If you're out of the room for a while they will come looking for you and they always greet us at the front door..this human is needy though and I want a fecking cuddle!!

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nooka Tue 27-Feb-18 02:50:35

Our current cats aren't snugglers, much to me and dd's disappointment. They can be quite sociable (mostly when interested in more food) but either sit on imperiously us or sit next to us. We've had them for seven or eight years now and they are more sociable than when we first got them. They are siblings and snuggle with each other at times though. Boy cat is super soft and had grown to tolerate dd picking him up and cuddling him but it's clear he isn't keen.

Next cats we get we're going to spend time in the cat room making sure they are cuddly before we take them home smile

Photo of the two of them tonight. Smaller cat sat on the bigger one, before he stretched into her. She is generally the boss.

Papergirl1968 Tue 27-Feb-18 09:33:42

Dcat is very affectionate and loves head rubbing and bumping, and cuddling up next to me, or lying between my feet, in bed. He will also roll on his back to have his tummy tickled.
I woke up the other morning to find him just gazing at me, with his eyes full of love.
But he’s not a lap cat. Never has been. Although he will sit or lie on my chest in bed as one of his tactics for waking until I push him off and roll over.
Quite glad he’s not a lap cat really as he weighs a ton!

PersianCatLady Tue 27-Feb-18 09:42:08

My cat tolerates cuddles but loves being stroked but only on her terms.

Namethecat Tue 27-Feb-18 09:47:31

My cat is a lovely ,vocal,snuggly cat, but she is weird as well. Will sit on my lap, gives me lots of head bumps etc but will not let me pick her up. My husband on the other hand can pick her up and holds her like a baby but she will not sit on his lap. We know our place in life.

Reallylongstory Tue 27-Feb-18 09:51:22

Yes! Cat is now 17 years old and we had her from 8 weeks as a rescue kitten. She hasn’t changed. Will sometimes sit next to you or come and look for attention if it’s close to dinner time but otherwise she just doesn’t care. Wish I could say they change but ours hasn’t. Was always jealous of people with affectionate cats.

TheMogget Tue 27-Feb-18 09:53:46

I have 2 and they are weird, one loves being picked up and having a cuddle but will not sit in your lap. They other is a proper lap cap but hates being cuddled.

Babdoc Tue 27-Feb-18 09:56:59

I think cats have just as varied personalities as humans. I’ve always had rescue cats, and some will cling round your shoulders like a scarf, wherever you go in the house, reluctant to be put down, while others are wary and will only approach to request food.
My current cat (who was 6 when I got her) was initially unwilling to interact at all, but now after one year with me, she will sleep on my bed, allow tummy rubs and quite lengthy head stroking, and will occasionally sit on my lap, although usually only if the fire has gone out and she’s getting chilly!
I’d never suggest trying to force a cat to accept cuddles - not if you want to keep all your fingers, anyway! - but gradually building trust and routines, trying a gentle stroke when offering treats etc, you can often improve their sociability.

Bindibot Tue 27-Feb-18 09:58:47

DCat likes to lie on my arm. She'll shout in my face till I put my arm just as she wants it. if I then even twitch she's off.

Cuddles up to DP in bed. . . bitch

LetBartletBeBartlet Tue 27-Feb-18 10:04:16

We've gone from a super cuddly lap cat of a Maine Coon (who would follow me everywhere, try to sit on my lap on the toilet, and was just a massive cling-on of a cat), to two black & white brothers who have no tolerance for laps and snuggles.

Each will flop on the floor for a belly rub, and one will head butt me for fusses, and sleep between my legs. Totally different experience of cat ownership though.

I wonder whether having them in pairs also makes a difference?

PersianCatLady Tue 27-Feb-18 10:05:52

Picture of my cat

Undies1990 Tue 27-Feb-18 10:12:35

My cat is lovely and affectionate, he'll follow me around the house and settle down next to me on the sofa BUT he will never, ever let me pick him up for more than a millisecond!

Here is the handsome chap

PersianCatLady Tue 27-Feb-18 10:30:00

I love threads like this one because I love the cat photos.

I really do love cats (and dogs)

QueenOfIce Tue 27-Feb-18 10:52:47

Love the photos! Here's one of mine..trying to eat the lights 🙄

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ifonly4 Tue 27-Feb-18 11:03:40

Both of mine always hated cuddles. However, they loved attention, company (my boy would wait on the stairs for me to return) and a lap, lap sitting time was always hours (or as long as I could take before needing the loo) so I'd go with that.

DarthNigel Tue 27-Feb-18 12:07:08

Or cat had always been a grumpy beast. He will come for a brief cuddle with me if an evening and push his nose into my face by that's about it. And he loves me best of all. He ignores literally everyone else.

HonkyWonkWoman Tue 27-Feb-18 12:09:56

I have cat cuddle envy.
My girl Suki, is feral, born in stables and rescued by Dgd before farmer found them and killed them.
Not sure how old she was when I got her but only about 3/4 weeks and had to feed her with a pippett. When she was tiny, she used to crawl up my front and sleep under my chin.
But from about six weeks, she went completely wild and couldn't get near her.
She's 2 now and will let me stroke her head if she's asleep sometimes and rubs around my legs in the morning but she's more likely to swipe me from the back of a chair as I walk past, nails in though, unlike my last feral girl who lived to 22 (feisty little devil that one).
She loves my old girl, Cross Labrador more than me.sad

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