My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

The litter tray

Worried about kitten (neglect)

54 replies

BirthdayBeast · 24/11/2017 17:08

Long story short, I accumulated a cat earlier this year (from an evicted neighbour) that turned out to be pregnant. Cat had four healthy kittens which I advertised locally. I made sure all kittens went to what I thought would be a good home and not to some creep wanting to feed them to snakes- two went to family members and two went to friends. I thought that would be the end of it however one of the family members has turned out to be the worst cat ownership .

Him and his girlfriend were so keen to have a kitten, bought everything they needed for it, got her vaccinated, flea and worm treatment, spent a lot of time playing with her and giving her attention, got her spayed etc etc. It started so well. However, after not treating her for fleas since the initial dose she has developed a bad flea problem and this has caused a deterioration in their care of her. This family member is so angry that she has fleas (due to his failure in protecting her) that he has banished her from the house into the internal porch. She basically lives in an area about 2 metres square. She spends all her time alone, cries constantly and is starved of any love and attention. Her litter tray stinks and she refuses to poo in it which has made the family member even angrier with her. Her water bowl is usually empty- the family member says it has to stay empty otherwise she tips it over and makes a mess everywhere. The family member is awful to the cat and torments her constantly by pushing her around the place with his foot, forcing her head down onto the floor, blocking her escape etc etc. Nothing that leaves a physical mark, but constantly upsetting/scaring the cat. I feel absolutely sick to my stomach at his treatment of the cat. I initially reported this to the RSPCA who did visit the family member but nothing came from it as the cat looks well cared for and is still affectionate to those who give her affection. The family member was outraged at being reported so when they mentioned it to me I mentioned that actually the care they gave the cat wasn't very good (they don't know I reported them and think it was a neighbour they recently fell out with). I also said that if they don't want the cat anymore then I would take her back and keep her myself. The family member wanted me to take her as he "hates" the cat but his girlfriend got upset and refused the offer (even though she ignores the cat most of the time). I am now stuck as to what I can do. I cant bear seeing (and knowing) that this cat is neglected most of the time and tormented the rest of the time. The RSPCA didn't do anything and my offer has been rejected. What can anyone suggest? Sad

OP posts:
Report
thecatneuterer · 24/11/2017 17:14

Shit. I don't know. Can you get more of the family on board to put pressure on them to give the cat up? Do you visit often? Can you do the flea treatments? Can you just march in with some big friends and take the cat? Without knowing the family dynamic it's very hard to advise.

Report
Fluffycloudland77 · 24/11/2017 17:17

Offer to buy her back?. What a cunt treating her like that.

Report
thecatneuterer · 24/11/2017 17:18

Yes, of course, money! Where cunts are involved it often works when all else fails (bitter experience).

Report
AllTheWittyNamesAreGone · 24/11/2017 17:18

I'd just take the cat back.

Report
BirthdayBeast · 24/11/2017 17:40

I'm just so sad about her. When they said they wanted one of the kittens I originally suggested they take this kitten because the girlfriend is at home all day (due to an illness) and wanted company whilst the family member was at work. This particular kitten was always very human orientated and loved snuggling with me rather than racing around with the other kittens. I feel so let down by both the girlfriend and the family member and had no idea that they would both be so neglectful and him so cruel. I don't want to be around either of them but feel i have to go round to check the poor cat is fed and watered.

I will ask this guy's father to speak to him about it and put the pressure on him to give me the cat. This guy is weirdly scared of upsetting his dad so hopefully he'll listen. However the real problems is this guy's girlfriend who is very stubborn- it's her I have to work on really. I don't think either of them care about the money but I will offer money to rid the cat of them.

I'm hoping my mum will take the cat as she originally expressed an interest in having one of the kittens. If she does say she'll take the kitten then I'm just going to catnap her and take her round my mum's. They'd never know my mum had her as they've never been or would go to her house. I am so bloody angry at them.

OP posts:
Report
BirthdayBeast · 24/11/2017 21:51

Good news! My mum will take the cat! Now just got to convince the girlfriend to give the cat up.

OP posts:
Report
BootsCats · 24/11/2017 22:06

I would try and get the girlfriend alone and try and reason with her. If not then just cat nap it! Anything to get it out of there, poor little thing. Let us know!

Report
BulletFox · 24/11/2017 22:24

Take the cat back for now

Report
snorkmaiden68 · 25/11/2017 00:34

When you go round to see the cat next just grab her and have a box in the car to transport to your mum s. They don't deserve being reasoned with. Poor little kitten. I hate people that get an animal then lose interest when something goes wrong. It's not her fault she got fleas, it happens and you treat it. You don't blame the cat. He sounds a right charmer and not fit to take care of an earwig. Catnap her

Report
BulletFox · 25/11/2017 01:37

What snork said, rereading this it's pretty horrific.

I got my little cat in 2009 and we didn't bond instantly, I pretend jumped at her that year (she was such hard work to integrate, she'd had a few owners, and it was a mock jump) but I'll never forget she took it seriously and the look on her little face. Felt so much guilt. It's ok, we bonded since and I've been careful to be extremely gentle since.

She probably saved my life actually as she wouldn't let exH hit me anymore. When he became violent she slept on my head so he had to stop!

Cat deserves better, snatch her.

Report
MsMims · 25/11/2017 01:44

If you can get access I’m afraid I’d just take her without another discussion about it. They sound horrible and she doesn’t deserve it. Deny all knowledge.

Report
Lindy2 · 25/11/2017 01:50

I couldn't just let them carry on as they are. Take the kitten back and explain to them sll the reasons you've just listed.

Report
ShmooBooMoo · 25/11/2017 02:02

While there is a clear case of neglect, there is also abuse. That bastard is enjoying tormenting the poor cat. She must be absolutely terrified! Part of me thinks you should just be completely honest and say that you allowed them to have the cat on the understanding it would be lovingly cared for in every respect, that the cat is clearly neglected and unwanted (man has made no bones about this!) and that as they have not fulfilled their side of the bargain you have a duty and responsibility to remove the cat from them.

OR, without mentioning a vet in particular, perhaps say you'd like to take the cat to a vet's to have the fleas properly treated and then say that the vet alerted the RSPCA as he believed there were clear and obvious signs of neglect. Explain that the vet said the cat will remain in the vet's custody until the RSPCA can collect, and that the cat is very, VERY unlikely to be returned to you so you can return her to them.

Okay, it's a lie but there is no way on God's earth that you can leave that cat in that situation. I wouldn't trust them with a goldfish!
The guy sounds unstable and capable of violence towards the cat. The girlfriend just sounds useless and selfish.
I think if the cat is rescued while she is still young there is a chance for her to develop normally. Left at the mercy of those two idiots in a confined space without the basics and starved of any affection/ interaction could result in the cat developing behavioural problems.

If they fail to surrender the cat to you by hook or by crook PLEASE report them. It's neglect PLUS abuse. No water, failure to treat fleas, pushing the cat around are all valid grounds for removal.

I wouldn't give a shit if this family member falls out with you. Who wants to have anything to do with scum like that, family or not! I'm livid at this poor cat's situation.

Please come back and update us. I will l worry sick about the poor thing :(

Report
ShmooBooMoo · 25/11/2017 02:05

ps. you could say that the vet gave you the chance to surrender the cat no questions asked or answer to the RSPCA.

Also, he might be just pushing the cat around when you're there. Who knows what he does when you're not there? He sounds like a sadistic piece of shit who is enjoying depriving the cat and possibly hurting her.

PLEASE do whatever you have to do to get the cat out of their clutches. I'll be thinking of her and you.

Report
ShmooBooMoo · 25/11/2017 02:08

Could you take your mum for back up? Or even ask his dad to go there with you and help you in removing the cat? Is he reasonable and likely to side with you?

Report
ShmooBooMoo · 25/11/2017 02:13

Ps They couldn't report you for removing the cat without repercussions for themselves.

When you get her, take her to the vet and let them see the state she is in. Have it documented. If she is obviously frightened of the vet, explain to the vet that she has been neglected and tormented (kicked, even if you've not witnessed him kicking her hard) and again ask them document it.

If they try to get the cat back this would be helpful, I think.

Report
ShmooBooMoo · 25/11/2017 02:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ShmooBooMoo · 25/11/2017 02:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrBenDover · 25/11/2017 02:33

What shmoo said! Brilliant! Ignore their feelings and get the cat 😻 out. I'm not a cat lover but no animal should have to put up with this crap.

Report
BulletFox · 25/11/2017 02:41

Just get her out and please update!

I felt so guilty when I pretend jumped at my cat years ago, I could see the fear in her face and sort of hesitated mid air (too late to stop.

You don't get an animal unless you think

Report
BulletFox · 25/11/2017 02:42

you can take care of them properly. Sorry pressed send before I'd finished

Report
overnightangel · 25/11/2017 07:30

Another vote here for just taking the cat (and giving your cunt of a family member a knee in the bollocks on the way out) 😡at reading this poor little thing

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

snorkmaiden68 · 25/11/2017 09:52

What angel said. A knee to the bollocks for his pure nastiness. Please let us know what happens, it's so upsetting picturing these cruel morons in charge of such a little baby

Report
livingasigo · 25/11/2017 10:15

I had an experience about a year ago when a neighbour started neglecting his cat, wasn't feeding it and eventually went back to his home country for 2 months and just left the cat outside.

It would cry and cry, it was so upsetting.
I called the RSPCA but they refused to do anything because the cat looked 'alright' they then told me to stop ringing them because they weren't going to do anything.

I was pregnant at the time, I started to care for the cat, after the RSPCA refused to help the last time I rang my sister and she took the him to give him a good home.

I think if it's a clear case of neglect and cruelty which by the sounds of it this is!
I would just physically take the cat away.

Some people sound not be aloud animals! It makes me so angry. Angry

Report
livingasigo · 25/11/2017 10:17

Should*

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.