I am boring my friends now I think but I lost my beautiful 8 year old cat Ruby 5 weeks ago. She was hit by a car and I only knew because I put posters up/used cat lost sites and talked to/leafleted neighbours. Ruby was a little adventurer and had gone missing before for a few days (she used to be a street cat that I took in coz her first owners were cruel and neglectful) but she always came back. This time she didn't and I m haunted by the fact she was found in a place I probably walked past several times calling her. Why didn't I look more closely in bushes/long grass? I hate thinking she could have been hit and lying in pain without me knowing. The vet who called me said it was almost certainly instant but she might have just said that to help me as I was crying so much?
Ruby was my baby I adored her and she loved me back. What really hurts is knowing she had a rotten life being starved and abused and having 3 litters of kittens before I got her(she chose me, jumped in my car one night and befriended me). I have a 14 year old cat who has been spoilt since birth and I just wish I could have had Ruby as a kitten too. I now have a 7 month old kitten I rescued who looks just like Ruby and she's helping but I can't get the guilt out of my head and I know she would have been miserable locked inside but I keep thinking I am the one who let her out that night. I keep crying. My heart actually hurts thinking I will never see her again.
Sorry for the long post but my friends are sick of listening and I m sure they think it's only a cat and as I have Ellie now I should forget Ruby.
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can't get over my cat s death
snorkmaiden68 · 30/10/2017 01:22
Sorry OP 
I also have a Ruby cat she is a rescue and I know she has a happy life with me having had a hard time before
Sounds like your Ruby was the same and had a lovely life with you. If her injuries were very bad she would not have known anything
Don't feel bad when cats like to wander its an unhappy life if they can't.
I'm very sorry OP
Like you my cat isn't "just" a cat he is my baby and I adore him. He is a rescue and the previous owners treated him badly so once they got fed up with him I took him.
My point is that you gave your Ruby a better life and clearly you love her very much and I am sure she knew that and felt your love. That's what you need to try to take away from the situation....that she was
and still is very much loved.
I'm sorry for your loss.
One thing that stands out to me is that you need to stop feeling guilty. It was a tragic accident, but certainly not your fault.
In fact you should feel the opposite - you did your very best for her and gave her a home when she needed it. She was lucky to have you.
@snorkmaiden68 it's ok to feel the way you do. It is, and nobody can tell you otherwise.
I felt sick for weeks, if not months, when I lost ShotsCat1.
I couldn't even bring myself to move her bowls for ages, and when I locked the cat flap I broke down. Even now, 6 years on I still fill up if I think too long about her; and that is 6 years of fostering cats and eventually leading up to owning being owned by ShotsCat2.
One thing I am glad I did though, was write a long and painfully heartfelt eulogy on a similar pet forum to this, ony a day or two after she died. I saved it and when I go back and read it now, I cry my heart out, but it also makes me feel so happy she was in my life. Maybe that would help - even if not published, just to write your story together.
At the time, kind people I knew told me that I will never forget her, and that as and when a new puss (and it will be the right one, the King of Cats makes it so) comes along, they will never replace a previous cat, they will just find more room in your heart for themselves. And it is true. Be happy you gave her love and the best life she could have had, not sad she died (feeling that massive love).
Such a beautiful girl. I hope you have lots of happy memories of Ruby. Thinking of you.
So sorry. It’s totally heartbreaking I know. We had our 18year old cat PTS in May, I still miss him every day. Take care of yourself
I had my cat (literally called Mie Cat) from when I was 5 until I was 17. She was 12 but she was shot with an air rifle. I was heartbroken for weeks. It took 3 years until I decided I wanted another cat. Even now (I’m 28) I get really angry and tearful if I think about it, it was just so unfair! It’s one thing if cats live long lives but it’s so much harder when their lives are cut short.
People might think you’re silly but sod them. Cats are so much more than pets and I think you’re allowed to grieve
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