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My kitten died today

(54 Posts)
NC2468 Thu 22-Jun-17 20:45:38

It was my fault. A complete accident, but my fault. I don't think I've ever felt so guilty. I only had her a really short time, I can't believe this has happened. I would pay a million pounds to turn back the clock by an hour. Her sister is looking for her. My 2 year old will be looking for her tomorrow. It must have been such a horrible way to go. I wanted to give her the best, most happy long life I could possibly imagine. Now I think I should give up her sister as I'm obviously not careful or responsible enough to have a pet 😢😢😢😢 I'm the most stupid, awful person! My poor baby deserved such better care. She was so funny and friendly and loving and she was settling into our family so well. We loved her. Her sister was much shyer and always looked to her for guidance 😢 I can't stop crying, for both of them. I really don't want to go into it, but it was a horrible way to go. Some things on google says it would be really quick, some said it would have took 20 minutes. I can't stop googling and thinking about my poor girl. If love could bring her back, it would. I actually feel lower than I've ever felt knowing I brought this pain to the most gentle perfect baby kitten. I'll miss her for the rest of my life.

NorthernLurker Thu 22-Jun-17 20:47:55

Oh I can guess what happened and please don't torment yourself. It was an accident. So sorry.

HunterHearstHelmsley Thu 22-Jun-17 20:48:46

I don't know what to say. Please try not to be too hard on yourself if it was an accident. Love her sister and keep her safe x

elevenclips Thu 22-Jun-17 20:48:59

It's normal to feel like this OP. My aunty adores animals and had an accident at home and a kitten died. You will get through the grief. Always remember it was an accident, you loved her and you did your best for her.

TheCatOfAthenry Thu 22-Jun-17 20:49:41

It was an accident OP, and her sister needs you even more now. Of course you're responsible enough.

Sending you a hug.

I know nothing we can say or do can reverse this, but please try to forgive yourself. Everyone makes mistakes. X

JamAndBread Thu 22-Jun-17 20:50:47

I'm so sorry for you all OP x

HunterHearstHelmsley Thu 22-Jun-17 20:51:08

And Please don't forget that you gave her love. Even if she was only with you a short time she would have been happy and safe.

choccybiscuit Thu 22-Jun-17 20:52:26

It was an accident. I work in a vets and we commonly see accidents involving kittens.

CatchingBabies Thu 22-Jun-17 20:54:39

It was an accident. I'm guessing involving a tumble dryer in which case it's sadly a common occurance with curious kittens. Don't blame yourself. I'm so sorry xx

BangkokBlues Thu 22-Jun-17 20:56:19

Oh no :-(

Kittens are quite little and adventurous and they get places you don't expect... don't beat yourself up. Just be there for your other kitten and your daughter.

Madbum Thu 22-Jun-17 20:56:28

I accidentally killed our rabbit. I've never felt so awful and retched in my life. Don't be too hard on yourself OP an awful person wouldn't care one bit and it's clear that you care very much.

Madbum Thu 22-Jun-17 20:57:54

And please stop googling you are only torturing yourself needlessly by doing so, it won't bring her back.

BeingATwatItsABingThing Thu 22-Jun-17 20:59:34

flowers

NC2468 Thu 22-Jun-17 21:12:05

Thank you so much for your kind words. I don't deserve them. They don't ease the guilt but they do bring a lot of comfort.

Right now, I'm thinking I should go out in the morning and get another kitten who looks like her so my DDs not sad and confused (she's only 2 and I know she'll forget soon enough but she's going through a lot with her dad ATM and she was really really attached to her and will be questioning her disappearance for months) and mainly so her sister has another best friend 😢 they were literally inseparable, I just think she'll be so sad on her own. Her sister loved us, but she was still very wary. She depended on her. She's non stop meowing now, I think calling for her 😢😢😢

Is this a terrible idea? I don't know if it's just horrific to think about replacing her, for their sake. Nothing will ever replace her in my mind. Maybe I'm just in shock. I know older children and people who have owned their pets for a lot longer have a lot more pain, I'm not doubting that. If it sounds heartless, please don't flame me. I'm not cold hearted, I can't stop crying. I just want to ease the pain for the two babies I have left

CherriesInTheSnow Thu 22-Jun-17 21:14:53

So sorry OP, how sad flowers

If you think kitten 2 and your little DD will be happer that way then I don't see a reason not to get another one. wine for you tonight.

FidgetSpinner Thu 22-Jun-17 21:17:12

How awful for you flowers

TheoriginalLEM Thu 22-Jun-17 21:17:41

You poor thing sad don't beat yourself up. It was an accident.

I am not sure that the remaining sister would accept another non sibling. It's one of those difficult dilemmas but it could cause more stress if they don't bond. Just offer her lots of love and she will be ok.

HunterHearstHelmsley Thu 22-Jun-17 21:17:44

The other kitten will know it's not her sister. If you think it will help your DD then don't not do it. But it may cause the other kitty some distress.

TheCatOfAthenry Thu 22-Jun-17 21:21:21

Young kittens are accepting of new company, generally. Obviously she'll know it's not her sister, but could still appreciate the companionship.

Any pain is made worse by self blame. It could happen to anyone.

You just lost your kitten. Anyone who has lost their kitten needs a bit of kindness. At the very least, give yourself a little bit.

cushioncovers Thu 22-Jun-17 21:21:39

Oh op I'm so sorry flowers

NC2468 Thu 22-Jun-17 21:22:22

Oh I don't want to cause her more distress, that's the last thing I want. Apart from my poor kitten who went through that horrible trauma, my heart is aching for her sister. I wouldn't do anything that might make her sadder. It's just she was so attached to her, and not really attached to us at all yet. But it's early days, and hopefully she will grow to love us. We will love her and protect her and give her the best life forever. Her sister would let DD stroke her, but she wouldn't and my DD would say oh no where's 'sister' gone if she was hiding under the sofa and try and include her in games (as in the toys on a stick) and things. We love her so much in her own right. I just feel so sad for her that she's on her own now

NC2468 Thu 22-Jun-17 21:23:21

Thank you, all your messages are making me cry where I couldn't cry before. Thank you for your sympathy. I really don't deserve it

Mrbrownstone Thu 22-Jun-17 21:23:58

Sorry op , what a horrible thing to deal with you poor thing. I know you dont want to go into detail but Im thinking of getting a kitten & your post has me thinking of safety. Maybe others might point out a few things to watch out for?

ThomasRichard Thu 22-Jun-17 21:24:19

I don't think it will help the other kitten. She will know it's not her sister and may feel threatened by the new arrival.

You can tell your DD the truth (in an age-appropriate way). You don't need to go into detail or say how it happened but just that the kitten died and sometimes it happens with tiny animals. It will be less confusing for her than anything else.

Sorry about your kitten flowers

ifonly4 Thu 22-Jun-17 21:25:14

OP, I feel for you, it was a genuine accident and obviously something you didn't see coming.

Give yourself a day or two before making decisions. Your DD may not be as upset as you think - you don't have to give her the full details.

Your other kitten may wonder where her sibling is for a week or two. The vet may able to give her somethi to relax.

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