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Tiny Dumped Kitten

(140 Posts)

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0nline Sat 20-May-17 08:12:47

The downside of rural Italian life.

Another sod decides the local English soft touch is the place to dump an unwanted kitten. I went to the loo and heard screaming from the back garden. It's far too small to have climbed over itself. At least this time it isn't in a plastic bag.

(former) Tiny Dumped Kittens 1-8 have been living with me for between 13-5 years. I cannot do 9 cats. I am already enough of a cat slave.

My vet (also my mate), has already messaged me saying I can put up a poster in her studio. Again. But my past posters did not work. Anybody good at heartstrings tugging text and design that can help me create a poster that will maximise my chances of finding this tiny scrap a good home ?

Our one local cat charity is permemntly packed to the rafters and in the past they have been determinedly guilt tripping when I have taken them dumpees. Like I am the meanest person ever if I don't want to be utterly overrun by cats. So that is a non starter. If I go there I'll come away convinced I deserve to go to hell if I don't keep it.

I need a shit hot "good home wanted" poster.

And for tiny kitten to stop looking at me with big, mournful eyes. With added little fluffy tail.

And for DS to stop trying to name it. Doesn't even look like an Emma. Might not even be a girl.

NotEmma has at least escaped the "drowned in a bucket" fate of so many tiny unwanted kittens here. Can anybody help me capitalise on her "less than averagely awful" luck and maximise her/his chances of being somebody's spoiled moggy for 20 contended, spoiled rotten years ?

I will go and try and take a picture to help the creative juices flow. But NotEmma is quite scared and is under the duvet, curled into DSS's armpit. And my iPad does not have a flash.

ForTheMany Sat 20-May-17 08:15:21

How sad sad

RueDeDay Sat 20-May-17 08:17:31

I'm really sorry, and I know this is a terrible reply, but all I can think is that this is the story you're going to be telling in 5 years time when people ask you about the interesting name of your ninth cat, NotEmma.

Mrsemcgregor Sat 20-May-17 08:22:48

Awww the poor little thing. I can't imagine it being hard to find a home for a teeny little kitty. But clearly that's by urban UK standards, not Italian rural.

Ummmm maybe write up some sort of heroic back story ala The Incredible Journey as to how NotEmma came to be in your town?

AddToBasket Sat 20-May-17 08:33:43

You need a cute picture and a 'could it be you?' type slogan.

Are you kind and caring? Do you want a friend who will make you laugh, keep you company and keep mice away? Could you find space in your heart and home for me? I might be small but I have a big heart.


Kpo58 Sat 20-May-17 08:39:14

Maybe do an oppersite poster. Such as the kitten looking sad looking dumped maybe with added plastic bag for affect. Have an added tagline of I didn't ask to be born and dumped at the roadside. Neuter your pets now to stop this happening. See if your vet friend would do a castration promotion too.

0nline Sat 20-May-17 09:02:37

DS has been given your ideas and been told he has Creative Writing into italian homework. He isn't not chuffed. And wants NotEmma to stay.

So I guess I'll have to write it and then get DH to tear his hair out over my eclectic preopositions and loosely goosey conjugations.

NotEmma has been persuaded out from the ArmPit of Comfort and is now in a cat carrier with my favourite cardigan. Thanks DS.

NotEmma's tail is still at the stands straight up stage. It's v. cute.

littleshoutymouse Sat 20-May-17 09:18:02

OP, there's only one thing for it.. you'll have to open your own cat sanctuary/rescue. I'll come work for you. I have plenty of cat crazy vet and vet nurse colleagues I can bring too. It will all be fine! grin

CormorantDevouringTime Sat 20-May-17 09:20:49

Aw she's so lovely! <<not helpful>>

illegitimateMortificadospawn Sat 20-May-17 09:22:03

Cute kitty. Erm, looks like s/he has moved in already. Game over.

MrsELM21 Sat 20-May-17 09:23:33

Hmm but surely one more wouldn't hurt... #saveNotEmma

RatOnnaStick Sat 20-May-17 09:25:01

What Rue said.

Meh. 8? 9? Who's counting?

isupposeitsverynice Sat 20-May-17 09:27:37

I will have her. I'm that selfless <halo>

DoorwayToNorway Sat 20-May-17 09:28:22

Can you appeal to a wider group. Maybe notemma could be a spoiled city moggy? S/he's very cute is Notemma. Sorry I'm nothelping grin

isupposeitsverynice Sat 20-May-17 09:28:23

Oh I missed the bit where you're in Italy, sorry. Nine cats for you then

hazeydays14 Sat 20-May-17 09:29:05

Can you ship NotEmma to me.. she/he is gorgeous!
misses point

AyeAmarok Sat 20-May-17 09:31:13

She's/he's beautiful.

If you were in the UK, I'd have her.

Poor little soul

WasabiNell Sat 20-May-17 09:32:31

Your ninth cat is very beautiful OP grin

isupposeitsverynice Sat 20-May-17 09:34:11

If cats have nine lives and you have nine of them, does that make some sort of magical immortal cats? Like the seventh son of a seventh son being a wizard...

I should probably get on with doing things instead of pondering life with nine cats and how I can achieve that without dh noticing

tigerdriverII Sat 20-May-17 09:38:21

She's adorable. You know what you're going to do, yes?

FeralBeryl Sat 20-May-17 09:38:22

Ooh NotEmma is beautiful grin
DS needs to design a huge sign for outside saying NO GATTI!!

Remember that old made up saying
8 to 9
You'll be fine.

0nline Sat 20-May-17 09:47:29

You lot are not helping.

DH already thinks I have crazy cat lady tendencies.

NotEmma thinks litter trays are pure evil. She/he went hedgehog spikey, fur standing on end in all directions.

DH called from the supermarket because he wasn't sure if NotEmma should have duck, prawn, or beef baby cat pate. Apparently cat food flavour is now a question requiring profound expertise, whereas he sees himself as the know nothing prone figure the feline population all sleep on in the evening.

Poor DH. They really do all flop on him. He can barely see the telly (cat draped on face issue) and can't move an inch once they have all bedded down on him for the evening. He's not big enough to squeeze one more in. At six foot tall he is already a full to bursting cat bed and there is just no more room. Not even for a little one.

NotEmma needs to go and be an only kitty somewhere lovely that is NOT MY HOUSE.

MateVet will pop in when she gets a break between emergencies and appointments, to give NotEmma a once over.

DS is on kitten sitting duty while I go to work. He is also on watching the thread duty so he can incorporate any cool and groovey ideas you come up with into the poster I want done by the time I get home.

So keep them coming.


Impressionable nearly 17 year olds see cute kitten. They do not see

-another dead mouse present dropped on my sleeping head
-more vomit in the dark for me to trend in
-more litter trays
-more howling cos has changed mind about which food is preferred.

Oh. Dh home with variety of baby cat pate. Time to break out the baby cat feeding bowls. At least this one doesn't need bottle feeding. Thank god. The last bottle fed one nearly killed me with sleep deprivation.

HebeJeebie Sat 20-May-17 09:54:32

Oh just keep her! You know you want to wink

She is verrrry pretty.

AintNobodyHereButUsKittens Sat 20-May-17 09:57:31

However gorgeous she is, as a veteran kitten fosterer I am an expert in hardening my heart and not keeping them regardless of cuteness.

So: UK Italian ex-pat forums may be the way to go. Facebook? As many gorgeous pictures as possible. Posing with props, curled up in boxes, perched on your shoulder, being cuddled by your most photogenic child (demonstrating tameness).

GiraffeorOcelot Sat 20-May-17 10:02:02

NotEmma is gorgeous. Not helpful I know...

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