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Tell me your funniest cat stories.

(40 Posts)
Toddlerteaplease Thu 29-Dec-16 15:25:53

Just that really!

cozietoesie Thu 29-Dec-16 15:35:40

Firstcat, when contemplating a bad sin, used to squawk to check that there were no people immediately around. Sadly for him, he never quite clocked that his squawks had the opposite effect to that intended. People, on hearing the squawks, would fly to the room - generally the kitchen - immediately in order to prevent the bad behaviour.

He was such a bright cat as well. grin

YoGatoradeMeBitch Thu 29-Dec-16 15:38:36

Vomiting on my pretty lit up table top Christmas tree. I was not impressed. The DC found it hilarious though. The cat did not seem at all embarrassed.

cozietoesie Thu 29-Dec-16 15:41:28

Oh My. grin Didn't he give you due warning? Mine always do 'plumbing noises' which gives me about 20/30 seconds to position them on an open newspaper.

abbsisspartacus Thu 29-Dec-16 15:48:45

Mine used to do bad Japanese impression before he vomited

There was the time when he fused the house by pissing on a live socket he ended up with a sore ding-a-ling and very fluffy fur

Other cat used to try and get out of the bath by diving towards the plughole attempting to drown himself in the process

Jumped off the wardrobe onto a roll of carpet which began to fall he kept off that and knocked the tv over

Fell through a shed roof

Fell off a garage roof

LeopardPrintSocks1 Thu 29-Dec-16 15:52:08

My cat once brought a whole crab through the cat flap. We have no idea where from; live in the middle of London.

YoGatoradeMeBitch Thu 29-Dec-16 16:03:10

No warning noises with DCat. He's strangely silent when he's sick. And unfortunately he is a bit of a sicky cat hmm

YoGatoradeMeBitch Thu 29-Dec-16 16:04:30

A crab?! Was it alive? I tend to get frogs. Blergh.

dnamummy Thu 29-Dec-16 16:04:39

Cats brought in a live bat and released in bedroom in middle of the night. It got caught up in the tasteful muslin swags (was the 90s) and screamed - I lept out of bed to try to catch and release as the 3 cats tried to scale the curtains to get to it. Flat was ground floor and I slept au natural back then so can only blush at the thought of the laugh I gave my neighbours returning from a night out blush

user1467976192 Thu 29-Dec-16 16:07:37

I think the funniest thing about my cat is after about a year of visiting the step kids don't know he exists. He hides in the closet (which is funny in itself he's an out and proud gay man the rest of the time). He comes out when they sleep

LeopardPrintSocks1 Thu 29-Dec-16 16:10:11

No it was dead. Hoping it wasn't off a neighbours table...

My other cat brought in a whole cheese once too. The neighbour came knocking and asked for it back as it was off her table!!

YoGatoradeMeBitch Thu 29-Dec-16 16:19:27

Haha thieving cats! Brilliant.

roseteapot101 Thu 29-Dec-16 16:31:20

lets think

many years ago in my childhood at a friend of mines house they had a mystery.The mystery of the missing socks,until one day we went to look for the cat.She had this beautiful wooden cat house on top of their american fridge freezer so we got a step ladder and had a look.There she was smug as punch a beautiful Siamese on her throne of socks.She looked so comfy =p

Then theres

A few years ago as i was relaxing on the sofa watching tv with the elderly one of our two cats on my lap,sleeping peacefully .He had gotten to the point were he was rather stiff a simple baby gate was a challenge to climb i had not seen him move more than snails pace is years.Then out of nowhere he go's flying from my lap down on the floor only to do a absolute epic fail crash landing.Next thing i know i see is a mouse legging it up the stairs.I found out the younger of our two cats had decided to give us a present.

life with cats is a never ending life of surprises

CaptainCallisto Thu 29-Dec-16 17:40:55

My Granny's cat once managed to trap herself under an upturned washing basket. We came home from the shops and there she was, in a purple plastic 'cage' on the kitchen floor. General theory is that she tried to use it as a platform to jump up onto the side, misjudged it, and flipped it over on top of herself. She looked so embarrassed about it! grin

Vinorosso74 Thu 29-Dec-16 17:49:08

Our last cat did some silly things normally to embarrass us. We had a friend over and went in the garden and said cat did the biggest pee/spray on the rhubarb whilst chatting to us (that rhubarb grew v fast...); landlord was coming to do a visit and same cat who was a useless hunter generally got a mouse, landlord arrived to me trying to get cat to drop the mouse.
Our flat was on the ground floor and he jumped in the bedroom window one night landing on crappy washing basket which collapsed folding up with him inside.
Current cat is generally quite sensible!

Vinorosso74 Thu 29-Dec-16 17:51:15

I'm liking the cat coming in with a crab!

gamerchick Thu 29-Dec-16 17:54:20

Mines just a grumpy git because i won't turn the sun on. I never thought I would see a bored, pissed off cat because its cold. I understand every dirty look and meow swear word.

Maudlinmaud Thu 29-Dec-16 18:01:08

My cat did a really outraged dance and scream on the windowsil one morning, I thought she had caught her foot in the radiator or something. Went over to rescue her and there was another moggy on the outside glaring up at her. How I laughed grin

PastysPrincess Thu 29-Dec-16 18:13:48

On a hot summers day we had left the back door open most of the day letting the cat wander in and out as she wanted. It was getting late and turning a bit cold so we shut the door after she wandered out for the last time. Five minutes later whilst just sitting there peacefully watching tv something smacks into the glass on the back door. my cat had obviously been spooked by something and ran full pelt into the glass not realising the door had been shut.

We went out to check she was ok but she wouldn't come near us for a good hour. She was such a stulid clumsy thing but I loved her to bits. Lost her 3 years ago at 17 years old

cozietoesie Thu 29-Dec-16 18:19:00

My father used to chase Firstcat down the kitchen corridor which had Lino for all of its length. (It was a ritual they had.) Firstcat would do a sort of three paw drift/scrabble into the kitchen on the left and then run for his hidey hole. ( Also part of their ritual.)

Unfortunately, my mother decided to buy a polishing machine one day and in a fit of unwonted houseproudness, decided to polish the whole corridor to a high glassy shine. Father chased Firstcat as normal but when he approached the open kitchen door on his left, he went into his 'turn' and - getting no purchase on the high gloss polish - flipped over onto his backside and sailed, on his backside, down the rest of the corridor until he landed in a heap of dirty clothing on the laundry floor.

He wasn't hurt but his pride took an almighty battering. He didn't speak to the family for the longest time! grin

Janey50 Thu 29-Dec-16 18:23:39

One of our cats brought a live bat in one night,about 4 years ago. What fun we had trying to catch it and release it.

Maudlinmaud Thu 29-Dec-16 18:29:36

grin cozie I just pictured that!

Toddlerteaplease Thu 29-Dec-16 18:50:26

These are brilliant!

Weedsnseeds1 Thu 29-Dec-16 19:04:57

leopard I think your cat and the tortie girl I had in London were litter mates. She carted home a Dover sole one day and also dragged a duck breast across my mother's cream carpets to devour it under the duvet upstairs.
The same cat also broke through two sliding doors ( converted them to giant cat flaps by bashing them out of the runners, rather than just pushing them open) to steal two pounds of sausage meat one Christmas.
Current cat threw a live frog at me from the top of the stairs.

hollinhurst84 Thu 29-Dec-16 19:09:25

Ollie ran outside this week, smacked neighbours cat around the head with his paw and ran back in. Poor neighbours cat just sat there while he did it twice more blushconfused

Stable cat has many tales but probably the time she decided to launch off the fence onto the bum of the hottest, sharpest horse on the stables. As it was being ridden. That went... Well grin
She also watches every mare give birth and will be frantic until she has seen the foal and then totters off chirruping to herself

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