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Sultan of F*cking "Ping"

(34 Posts)
RubbishMantra Mon 19-Dec-16 19:14:39

It all began with me pinging a giant rubber band, which Little M would fetch. When disintegrated, I ordered him a bumper pack of the things. I get sad, accusing eyes if he deems it's time for Ping, and "Pffft" noises if I don't comply.

Now the game of Ping has disintegrated into me pinging the bloody thing, Little M gleefully pouncing on it, tossing it about, pretending he can't find it, or placing it just out of reach, resulting in me fetching it for him. Rinse and repeat, otherwise he becomes a small, tantrumming bulldozer.

Then the constant worry he might swallow it, so a mad dash about the house, (usually just before bed-time) to find the Ping, and lock it away from his little monkey paws.

He is a dick. But also the light of my life. He's looking at me with accusing eyes because I just put it away.

Weedsnseeds1 Mon 19-Dec-16 19:49:06

Can you tie a sturdy length of fishing line to the ping so you can retrieve it without getting up?

Fluffycloudland77 Mon 19-Dec-16 20:16:42

You have to wonder who's entertaining who?.

Can you get fluorescent ones?.

RubbishMantra Mon 19-Dec-16 21:05:52

I do have a fishing rod clippy thing, but he likes to see it speeding through the air, then bouncing off the ceiling/walls. I fear the fishing line may impede the Ping's trajectory. And I think about 80% of his fun is watching me scuttle about on all fours searching for it, Weeds. However, I have a lot of fishing line, being an accomplished Pike fisherwoman. Not a stealth boast, an out and out boast. grin I always check them over for leeches and check their throats in case some idiot gets freaked out on contemplating their rows of teeth, and cuts the line instead of un-hooking them properly, leaving their throat sealed.

Hmm Fluffy, glo-pings. I shall see if they can be obtained. But the little bugger sunbeam of joy is so good at hiding stuff. He has a secret stash of at least 20 squeaky mice, and Christ knows what else stashed in a Secret Location. Years ago, when moving I found a pile of pound coins, that my dearly missed cat, Bambos had collected.

Weedsnseeds1 Mon 19-Dec-16 21:23:17

If I caught a pike, I'd eat it, but I'M m sure that's not in the spirit of things!

RubbishMantra Mon 19-Dec-16 22:18:04

Weeds, never eaten one, apparently dull of tiny bones and muddy tasting. Just like to pit my wits against another predator. Now Salmon on the other hand....

When I was a kid my mum used to take us "winkling" for those little underwater sea snails. I felt bad for them and after a day of "winkling" I sneaked off and set them free!

Same with the crayfish - we've been invaded by Signal crayfish, which are detrimental to other water dwellers in the UK. I caught loads, and was imagining how delicious they would taste, dipped in a garlicky herb butter. I set them free too. Which is illegal apparently. Their little eyes on stalks just looked so judgy. But by God they looked tasty...

kelper Mon 19-Dec-16 22:21:58

Pike taste yucky and muddy and are FULL of very small hard bones.
DHs friend "kindly" brought one over years ago, I wouldn't bother trying to eat one again, If I recall correctly we ordered a chinese after attempting pike-eating......

Weedsnseeds1 Mon 19-Dec-16 22:35:53

Signal crayfish are delicious. I wouldn't feel in the slightest bit guilty! You need to put pike through a sieve and make quinelles or mousse to make the most of it.

RubbishMantra Tue 20-Dec-16 00:17:52

Oh, but I looked in their sad beady eyes on stalks. I'm a total hypocrite, because I eat meat and fish. Including langoustine and cray fish!

RubbishMantra Tue 20-Dec-16 00:29:54

*...and I stuck a finger out, to see how hard the Signal crayfish could pinch. Won't do that again. <ouch> Still set the little pincer waving bods free... should've bloody eaten them

Weedsnseeds1 Tue 20-Dec-16 06:29:39

Pop them in the freezer first to knock them out!

Fluffycloudland77 Tue 20-Dec-16 07:50:01

I thought that was classed as animal cruelty now by the RSPCA?.

I love sea food but I don't like how they kill it so I don't eat it anymore.

iloveeverykindofcat Tue 20-Dec-16 08:38:19

How does he tantrum? grin

Toddlerteaplease Tue 20-Dec-16 09:26:36

Tantrumming bulldozer. Just laughed out loud at that. As a PP has said. How does he do it?!!grin

RubbishMantra Tue 20-Dec-16 12:05:32

He walks around with his head down uses it to head-butt everything over Things containing liquid are most favoured. The neighbours must think I'm cruel to him, because they hear a never end of "Oi, stop being a dick!", and "Don't you DARE!"

Toddlerteaplease Tue 20-Dec-16 15:06:36

But little M is such an adorable angelic catmonkey he would never be naughty.

hollinhurst84 Tue 20-Dec-16 15:10:02

We need some form of swap system going on
You can take howling cuddly Ollie cat and play with ribbon, I'll ping bands grin swap back in 24hrs

RubbishMantra Tue 20-Dec-16 15:38:23

I know Toddler. I look at him at get those "Love-lights" in my eyes, like the ones favoured in Japanese cartoons. Even when he's having a hissy fit at 4am because he got out of bed for a snack/wee and can't find his way back under the duvet.

Hollinhurst, he's relentless with the pinging. And makes really strange noises. The sort of noises I've never heard uttered from a cat. Or anything really. I'd love to see Ollie's Ribbonface in real life though...

hollinhurst84 Tue 20-Dec-16 16:06:40

Ollie has taken to making an "oof" noise like an old man when he jumps off anything hmm

Fluffycloudland77 Tue 20-Dec-16 16:37:39

I don't think anyone would have asbo twice hollinhurst.

Those poor pikes having the hook left in 😱 People are so bloody thoughtless.

iloveeverykindofcat Wed 21-Dec-16 06:39:17

Bibi does this thing where she physically inserts herself between my face, hands, and whatever I'm doing. So say I'm in bed reading on the kindle, she'll come slinking up, purring, sliiiide her way in so she's on top of the kindle in the crook of my arm, and stare into my face until I give her my full attention grin

Potentialmadcatlady Wed 21-Dec-16 07:33:20

Devon tantrumming is hysterically funny ( until they make a mess knocking a Coke can over and runny through it) ...lots and lots of loud 'talking' at you and very evil eyed looks...

RubbishMantra Wed 21-Dec-16 12:35:38

It is isn't it, Potential! He doesn't do it very often, just when he's over-tired (beats up my knees a bit, no claws and pretend biting) and the bulldozer moves when I put his ping away. So every day actually.

Does your Devon make any noise resembling a miaow? Mine just makes strange variations of, errrrr-uh, uung-YA! Sometimes an oooo.

I don't really go fishing anymore Fluffy, I wouldn't like to find a hook in my M&S sarnie, and be pulled out of my environment. It was surprising how many had their throats sealed with hooks. Fishing matches are the worst - the competitors don't like Pike, because they eat the smaller fish that they're trying to catch. It's not unusual for them to put out a rod for a Pike, land it and leave the poor creature to die on the bank. Disgusting.

hollinhurst84 Wed 21-Dec-16 12:39:28

I really want a Devon now envy
I'm not sure how Ollie would react....

RubbishMantra Wed 21-Dec-16 15:10:25

They do best in a multi animal household, Hollinhurst. All our neurotic black and white boy MCat did was growl, swipe and hiss at Little M, who would bound off gaily, and try to befriend him an hour later. Never retaliated or hissed at MCat. They're like brothers now.

But... there were 2 humans in the household then, and MCat was closely bonded to DH, (he was DH's cat before we got together) who sadly died a while back. MCat was very depressed and lost a fair bit of weight when DH was no longer here, and I'm sure Little M helped him through it. And MCat's now back to his lovely, chunky squishy shape.

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