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New kitten hates me :(

(44 Posts)
ClarkL Tue 06-Sep-16 10:14:14

We have 4 cats, we've had loads of cats and yet I have never experienced this before...I've also never had a kitten quite so tiny.
So kitten is 12 weeks old.
Arrived yesterday, we got him out the box, fussed him, he purred, he curled up and slept and all was good. We went out gave him just one room with food/litter etc
When we came back he refused to come out his box and hissed lots.
We thought he may be overwhelmed so moved him to a much smaller room, spoke to him, left him, went back and spoke a bit more. Last night he was in his room.
Hes eaten food, not been to the toilet in 24 hours, not even a wee
I cant go near him without him hissing, I tried ignoring the hissing and stroke his head like I did yesterday (that was what made him purr) but he just carried on hissing so I've stopped.

I get he may well be overwhelmed but he seems genuinely terrified and its so odd that at the breeders he was loving, first home loving and now he's terrified.

The room he's in is the front porch so about 1 metre by 2 metres
No cats have been in there so their smell cant upset him
The other cats cant get to him

Any ideas??

cozietoesie Tue 06-Sep-16 10:21:04

He sounds like a sensitive sort for whom it's all getting a bit too much. Can you bring him into the main house somewhere? (Especially overnight.)

(Is there any way he could have injured himself while you were out by the way? Have you seen him walking?)

ClarkL Tue 06-Sep-16 10:27:49

The front porch is in the main house, same temperature of the house etc its odd to explain but we have 3 entrances to the house and this one is never used (dumping ground) but is effectively a large well lit cupboard as the doors are glass.

I contemplated taking him to the vets to be 'sure' but if its stress and he's terrified that's not going to help him.

He has moved about, I can stand way back and watch him and saw him go investigate his food this morning and was walking fine.

My oldest cat meowed whilst I was sitting in with the kitten (eldest is like glue and spends all day whilst I work at my desk) and the kitten seemed really interested in him, poking his head out to look at him. I wonder if he's just not had enough human contact yet??

cozietoesie Tue 06-Sep-16 11:14:55

If he's still hissing later today/tomorrow morning, I think I'd have him to the vets to make sure he's fine. (And keep an eye on his toileting.) It does no harm to have him given a once over as a new kitten and the change in him sounds very marked.

ClarkL Tue 06-Sep-16 11:52:46

It really is sad
I have batted about a small bell ball and he's shown an interest. I have moved my laptop in so I can sit here with him and work, hes managed a whole paw out the box without hissing at me, although I think thats because he can smell my coffee and seems to like it! Maybe one of his breeders/carers drank coffee?!
I was hoping to get him to the week within the first fortnight for a check, he has 4 weeks free insurance so no huge rush to do in the first 7 days like some. I do hope hes simply overwhelmed though

cozietoesie Tue 06-Sep-16 12:07:28

Fingers crossed for the wee lad. (Where's the picture by the way?grin)

It's a dilemma for you - wanting to partly ignore him and let him settle into his new routine but, at the same time, worried about him. How is the rest of the household doing?

ClarkL Tue 06-Sep-16 12:15:59

Where are my kitty manners?!
SO pic one is glue cat, staring at me wondering why i'm sat on the floor and away from him
Second pic is Terrified Terrance who doesn't like me in his box
Final pic is less Terrified Terrance yesterday when he actually looked like he loved me a little

Arfarfanarf Tue 06-Sep-16 12:20:56

When you've had him checked out and assured yourself that there is nothing physically wrong I would just settle myself in the same room with a book and a little plate of treats near you on the floor and don't look at him, don't try to coax him out, just sit down, read your book, ignore him. Spend time like that every day. Let him get used to the sight and smell of you.

I did that with one of my cats who was a rescue. He was an old lad. He spent a week in a cupboard and wouldn't go near anyone. The more I tried to approach him, the more he went bat crap crazy. He needed me to ignore him completely and let him make all the moves.

Iamdobby63 Tue 06-Sep-16 12:29:52

I think Glue has had a quiet word to Terrance telling him not to even think about it as you are his mum

Seriously though if I've read it right they are both boys. Not sure if that will effect bonding, I've always gone for a boy/girl mix.

ClarkL Tue 06-Sep-16 12:34:08

We have now a total of 4 boys and one girl.
I used to foster cats for our local cat rescue and we could never bring a girl in without our girly going totally batshit crazy. We also have a feral who visits, I can't get close to him but know hes a boy as my girl cat goes out to chatter to him!!

I've always had rescue/older cats never ever ever a kitten so was a bit alarmed by his super purring then hiding/hissing

NotAPuffin Tue 06-Sep-16 12:45:38

Could you try a different type of litter? Maybe what you have isn't what he's used to, and holding it in is making him upset?

ClarkL Tue 06-Sep-16 13:24:14

Kitty litter is the same NotAPuffin sad
Have left him for a bit now, I dont want to overwhelm him by sitting in there all day (plus my bum went numb sat on the floor)

cozietoesie Tue 06-Sep-16 14:17:37

Best to just go about your normal business while he's coming to terms with his new life. smile

RubbishMantra Tue 06-Sep-16 15:59:03

Cats purr for all kinds of reasons - self soothing and showing that they're not a threat are 2 of them.

I'd make a vet's appointment to register him, and at the same time discuss what you've written on here as soon as you can.

Maybe his breeder didn't socialise him very well? If that's the case, do a search for socialising ferals, I know he's not, but the process is the same I'd reckon.

What breed is he? He's beautiful. smile

RubbishMantra Tue 06-Sep-16 16:01:27

Maybe pop a cuddly toy in his box with him as well.

ClarkL Tue 06-Sep-16 16:06:23

He's a bengal Mantra. We have a spotty, a rosette, a snow and now a metalistic.....might try and persuade the husband in a year or two we need a marble for a complete collection!

I think a cuddly toy is a good idea.
He's mouthed a bit at the bell ball and a squishy ball in there and he's walking about no issue when he cant see me.
Hes fast asleep now, as opposed to just hiding so will wait for him to wake up and pop the teddy in.

He's also eaten again this afternoon, he has till tomorrow am to poop or hes straight to the vets, if we get a wee and poo from him I'll take him start of next week when hopefully he's a bit more chilled.

RubbishMantra Tue 06-Sep-16 16:57:37

Being a Bengal might have something to do with it - the wild genes may have kicked in, for self preservation. Especially as cats have only been kept as pets for the last couple of hundred years in western society, before that they were seen more as 'working animals', to keep the mice and rat population. Throw those wild genes into the mix...

You know you would never hurt him, but he doesn't know that yet.

Did the breeder allow you to visit him before you adopted him? If so, how did he seem with the breeder? Did he like being handled, enjoy interaction?

My little lad, (not a Bengal - a Devon Rex) promptly fell asleep under my chin when I first met him at 5 weeks.

What unusual and beautiful colouring. I'm sure he'll settle in.

Fluffycloudland77 Tue 06-Sep-16 19:42:22

You have four bengals?

I don't know if I should be impressed at your fortitude or send for the men in white coats.

One Bengal is trashing my house completely. I've even got to replace all the skirting boards now.

Do you know how far away he is from the original Asian leopard mating?. Ours needs lots of reassurance when he's scared, I'd try and get as much time with him as possible. Company needs to be the new normal.

cozietoesie Tue 06-Sep-16 19:56:02

Replace the skirting boards.....?

Fluffycloudland77 Tue 06-Sep-16 20:10:04

The builders only put one or two coats of gloss on and where he's sprayed the paints come off and the mdf has expanded. I might as well replace the whole lot and paint it properly.

He's also ripped the silicone seal around the window frames.

OlennasWimple Tue 06-Sep-16 20:18:14


cozietoesie Tue 06-Sep-16 20:28:08

Lordy. It's a good job he's Mummy's Boy. grin

ClarkL Wed 07-Sep-16 09:03:28

Sorry manic night last night, primarily constant bloody reminders to children who are old enough to know better to leave the blummin kitten alone.

So good news is we had a poo and wee in the night, bad news is whilst he's clearly been in his tray that was so he could spin round scatter litter everywhere and instead take a big poo on the fuzzy throw. I'll just go buy another then....!

We've had 2 cats from this breeder before, one an ex breeding queen and one who was returned because he was difficult he was a typical bengal and the new owner only saw a spotty exotic cat with zero research.
Because of this (and us now living almost 3 hours away) my husband went to see the kitten, loved him and bought him home same day. So he hasn't spent as much time as we ideally should have with the kitten.

Fluffy I am very much the mad cat lady. I work from home and most customers now ask which cat is yelling in the background, the villagers seemed really alarmed when we moved in and were seen walking 'a wild leopard' on a lead in the village

QuestionableMouse Wed 07-Sep-16 11:02:10

Can you leave a worn top in his area so he can get used to your scent? Keep trying different toys too, tiny cat had no idea what to do with a ball but went mad for a 'snake' on a stick thing I had. (basically a long fluffy tail glued to a wooden stick.)

Fluffycloudland77 Wed 07-Sep-16 12:38:20

Maybe he didn't realise at first that he was on his own. Ours called for his mum for a day or two despite being 17wks and mum biffing him and his sister.

He's obviously got different taste in fuzzy throws to you.

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