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Lost my cat yesterday, didn't think it would be this bad

(13 Posts)
Tillylils Tue 23-Aug-16 22:52:27

My beautiful cat passed away yesterday. I'm heartbroken. She was 16, and I can't imagine life without her. She was sick yesterday morning which is not unusual for her. We went out for a few hours and when we got back, she was walking strangely and I knew it was bad. She then started fitting which was awful. I wrapped her in a blanket and rushed her to the vets, she carried on fitting all the way and just as we got there she died in my arms.
I only ever took her to the vet if I absolutely had to as she was terrified of them and it was a very traumatic experience for her. Now, looking back I wonder if she had hyperthyroidism and if I should have taken her. Over the past 2 years she lost a lot of weight although her appetite was the same. I just put this down to old age. She was also seeking out cool places to sleep which I put down to it being summer. Over the last few months she stopped grooming herself which I also put down to age. I feel so guilty that I could have done more to make her life better.

Tillylils Tue 23-Aug-16 22:54:00

Also, she had recurrent cystitis, but I would add extra water to her food and it would clear up.

Potentialmadcatlady Tue 23-Aug-16 22:56:38

I'm so sorry for your high little one....she had you with her cuddling her at the end,she knew she was loved

Nodney Tue 23-Aug-16 22:57:07

Oh Tilly I'm so sorry. I'm sure you gave her a lovely life. 16 is an old age for a cat. You would have taken her to the vets if she'd been in distress this last couple of years so you have nothing to reproach yourself for.

YesItsMeIDontCare Tue 23-Aug-16 22:57:11


Be kind to yourself OP. It's very hard, and I think we are all guilty of punishing ourselves with what ifs.

Remember her happy 16 years of being loved so much, and how special she must have felt to be loved that much. Take comfort in the knowledge that 16 is a good age for a cat and that her 16 years were happy.

WatchMeSoar Tue 23-Aug-16 23:06:19

I'm so sorry you lost her x

Tillylils Tue 23-Aug-16 23:22:01

Thank you for your replies, you're very kind. I love her so much and I hate the thought that she might have suffered. I feel guilty about the times I moaned about cleaning the litter tray and even looked forward to when I didn't have to do it any more. I'd happily do it forever to have her back.

TimeIhadaNameChange Wed 24-Aug-16 10:43:48

Please stop feeling guilty. You did all you could for her. She had a lovely life with you and died in the place she'd have wanted to, in your arms next to your heart.

And just to increase the sentimentality even further:

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

user1471458525 Wed 24-Aug-16 13:31:29

Bloody hell, sitting here in tears reading that. 😿

Tillylils Wed 24-Aug-16 13:59:43

Thank you timeihadanamechange, that made me cry x

Tillylils Wed 24-Aug-16 19:44:52

I hate this feeling. I miss her so much.

TimeIhadaNameChange Thu 25-Aug-16 10:07:36

Hugs. It's a terrible feeling, and in a way made worse by the thought that "she's just a cat" and so you feel even worse for feeling that way. But of course she's not "just a cat" she was part of your family.

What have you done with her body? I have got most of mine cremated (I say "most" - all barring a few I had as a child who died before we knew of pet cremation) and their remains will be coming in my coffin. DP really doesn't understand, but now automatically plans a journey across country to the crematorium each time one of mine dies. It's expensive, but worth it imo.

Tillylils Thu 25-Aug-16 10:12:17

Thank you for replying. We are having her cremated, we do this with all of our animals too. That's a nice idea about having them in your coffin, I think I'll do that too. I think I'll feel better when she's back home where she belongs.
I've just emailed my local rspca centre about volunteering. I just miss having someone to care for. I have my dog and my daughter but Lulu was old and needed more care and I miss that .

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