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I think it's a dirty protest

(21 Posts)
hillyhilly Tue 05-Jul-16 22:29:27

We have an elderly, (18), Bombay blue cat, very affectionate and needy and doing well for her age.
She's always been prone to peeing on the doormat if something wasn't to her liking - the other cat. ( Now gone), cleaners coming, been on holiday etc but in addition to this she now has constipation being helped by daily lactulose.
Last year we got a puppy which she loathed but she moved upstairs and he was down and she'd hiss and swipe at him to keep him in check, sadly the pup was aggressive to us not her and was rehomed.
We're really hoping to adopt another dog, an older pup lurcher in September.
This weekend we had my friends Labrador overnight as a favour, the cat was not impressed but was mostly separate and the dog was kept away from her.
Since the dog went home the cat seems to be staging a dirty protest, I discovered she'd pooed in our spare room, then last night she did a poo (not easily) and a huge pee all over the floor of the same room when we were right there.
She's been kept locked in the utility where her bed is today, tonight we closed the downstairs doors with the intent that she could be in the living room with us but within two minutes she's trying to poo on the floor right next to dh!
What to do? She's banished to the utility again, she had blood tests at the vet a fortnight ago which were v good for her age but showed her disgust at that experience by pissing all over dh's clothes which were on the floor.
We can't live like this, in my heart I know we shouldn't adopt a dog but I really do want to, and frankly at 18 is this the beginning of the end? She's been utterly gorgeous but we can't have the house treated like a giant litter tray, it stinks.
We tried Feliway in the past with no noticeable effect.

MaddyHatter Wed 06-Jul-16 09:14:00

its not a dirty protest, cats are not people, please stop trying to put your human feelings onto an animal.

What it most likely is, is she's stressed, and feeling threatened and territorial.. the peeing and pooing is her way of trying to make herself feel more secure by making the things around her smell of her, she's essentially 'claiming' that area and saying 'this is mine' and it makes her feel safer.

She's 18, she's an old lady, and at her age, she's entitled to some peace and quiet. Bringing strange dogs into the house, shutting her in rooms that don't smell of her and whatever other stupid 'punishments' you are doing are just going to make things worse.

As far as she is concerned, the house stinks of the dog, she wants it to smell like her again, she feels threatened and stressed... she is not 'protesting'

hillyhilly Wed 06-Jul-16 10:03:53

I am not punishing her, the utility is where her heated bed, litter and food & water are and where she sleeps overnight. However, I hadn't thought about the fact that the smell of the dog could still upset her.
In my mind, the dog had gone and so she should be "back to normal" however, for her, it Obvs doesn't work that way.
I don't like banishing her to the utility, even though it is very comfortable (and the dog never went in there) but that seems our only option for now.
If I were to try a Feliway again, would it go in the utility where she spends plenty of time, or in the house where she's demonstrating her stress?
We love her dearly, have had her since a kitten and she is the most loving cat - I realise that not much of that came across in last night's post - was feeling rather stressed myself!

MaddyHatter Wed 06-Jul-16 10:10:08

the feliway would probably do better in the house.

The other thing you can try is scent soakers. Put some blankets where she sleeps, so they literally soak up her scent, and then put them around where the dog has been.

If she's always had this habit of marking when new things come in the house, she's obviously quite easily threatened, so scent soakers might be the way to go as she gets older.

hillyhilly Wed 06-Jul-16 10:14:09

Thanks, I've ordered a Feliway and will try the scent soakers now too, I've not heard of that for this problem before.
We want her back, but not until our floors are safe!
The house has been thoroughly cleaned and all the windows are now open too which I hope will help

RubbishMantra Wed 06-Jul-16 14:20:54

IMO bringing a large, exuberant dog that's been bred for hunting/sighting/speed is a really bad idea.

As Maddy says, she's not being bad or "protesting", she's trying to make herself feel secure.

I know you want a dog, but can't you put her first in her dotage years, and wait until she's not with you any longer before getting a dog? Otherwise her remaining years will be miserable.

hillyhilly Wed 06-Jul-16 14:26:15

I'm having to think that one through carefully, I was hoping to get a dog that has been fostered with cats and so is cat friendly but am rapidly realising that won't make the cat 'dog-friendly'.
She's 18, getting on, but doing well, she could live another 5-6 years, I honestly don't want to wait that long for a multitude of reasons- kids are now 9 & 11.

bonzo77 Wed 06-Jul-16 14:49:01

She's messing because she's stressed. She's stressed in part because of the dog visitor. Being ill will not help. I can't see how you're going to introduce a dog without making things worse. It'll really stress her out and it's cruel. So if you really want a dog you need to get rid of the cat. You'll have problems rehoming and elderly, sick, stressed cat. So I guess the humane thing to do is to PTS. Nice end for an 18 year old relationship. And what will you do with the dog once it gets inconvenient or doesn't fit in with your plans?

RubbishMantra Wed 06-Jul-16 15:16:13


Fluffycloudland77 Wed 06-Jul-16 15:31:58

I couldn't put an elderly cat through that much stress. She knows she's old and vulnerable, so will the dog.

You owe her more than this. You also need to think what your teaching your kids re responsibility because one day it might be you pooing on the floor and worse.

At 18 she hasn't got that much longer left.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Wed 06-Jul-16 15:38:48

Poor old lady is making her feelings known,shes stressed!

RubbishMantra Wed 06-Jul-16 15:39:20

Would you mind explaining why your children's ages come into it? Is it because you'd like them to have a dog in their younger years? They don't need a dog.

You have a pet already, who is clearly stressed by the presence of dogs, and you'll have double the crap/piss to clear up during puppy training time. Puppy's and DCat's.

Your last post comes across as if her living another 5-6 years is an inconvenience. Do you like her?

How will it affect DCat, smelling dog poo/pee in her territory?

This thread has made me very sad, as to how some people view animals as dispensable. Perhaps because I live in an area where people obtain an animal, then "set it free" when they're posted back to their country.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Wed 06-Jul-16 15:41:03

I would deep clean the house including cleaning the carpets if you have them and put more litter boxes down. Is she too elderly to use a high cat tree?

MaddyHatter Wed 06-Jul-16 15:54:43

the other thing is, she might also go awol or find somewhere else.

I've had experience with neighbours on both sides with elderly cats. The one lot just got fed up with her and it got so bad that i and 3 other neighbours reported them to the RSPCA.. that was after i found their 21yo cat shivering on my backstep in the snow having been out there all night.. after a weeks of me banging their door when she was begging to be let back in.

The other side have 2 16/17yo cats and just added a labrador puppy.. both cats are now trying frequently to get into my house and spending most of their time in my garden because its quiet and sheltered and my cats don't mind them.

I know you want a dog, but if its going to stress your cat out, you have to think of her, or rehome her.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Wed 06-Jul-16 15:59:30

Thinking about this some more,my cat would go bananas if we just had a random dig for a visit. He's just about tolerating my mum's dog and that's taken 6 month if very controlled exposure and the dig being kept on the lead. We can now feed the pair of them in the same room but it really has taken ages and a tall cat tree so he can escape and view the dog from a great height.

PlanD Wed 06-Jul-16 16:14:54

I agree with the views and advice on this thread. Your very elderly cat has to be your priority - letting her live our the remainder of her life stress free. If you love her dearly as you say, this is your responsibility towards her. She's shown you, in the only way she can, how upset and stressed she is by dogs. 'Cat-safe' lurchers/greyhounds still pose a risk. They've usually been tested against confident, calm, dog-friendly cats and are OK with those particular cats - it doesn't mean the prey instinct wouldn't kick in with a cat who ran away from thread soon as they saw them.

gamerchick Wed 06-Jul-16 16:23:44

It sounds as if you're looking for permission to put her down because you want a dog. I'm sure that's not correct, just the way it sounds.

You need to wait. There'll be time to get a dog yet.

bonzo77 Wed 06-Jul-16 16:58:37

Just read all this again. I actually don't think you get your (or any other) cat's needs. I'm cross on your cats behalf. My cat is young and fit and well. She's really nervy. I'd never let a dog in the house. I've fallen out with both my BIL and MIL over not letting their dogs in, not even in the garden. I really would like another cat. But won't as it would upset her.

PinkSparklyPussyCat Wed 06-Jul-16 18:24:18

Your poor cat. I agree with previous posters who say she sounds like an inconvenience to you. No one needs a dog - we had dogs when I was growing up and I still prefer cats.

It would be cruel to get a dog and make your poor cat's final years miserable - a nice reward for 18 years of companionship.

hillyhilly Wed 06-Jul-16 19:30:07

She's not an inconvenience (apart from toileting on the floor I suppose), and we will put her first in any decision we take, she's a huge part of our lives and none of us can imagine life without her, we will all be devastated when the time comes as she has such a gorgeous personality - she's no aloof cat!
I guess the question is whether she can tolerate living in the same house as a dog, which is what we would like in the perfect world, or not, which is how it's looking. That's hard to know, although this weekend would certainly indicate not.
For the time being we're focussing on getting her back to happy, that is all that matters.
Please do not get cross on her behalf, she is nurtured, loved and cared for, but it is true that I would dearly love to have a dog while the DC are still young - but if we can't, we can't, we'll never not own a cat I don't think.

IceMountain Wed 06-Jul-16 21:06:26

If she's seeing where she shouldn't, it's also worth getting the vet to check her out for cystitis. That can be brought on by stress.

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