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I think I've finally tamed bastard cat

(23 Posts)
Verypissedoffwife Sat 07-Nov-15 01:10:14

Or we've got an understanding at least. After 18 months of shit from him (shredding furniture, carpets, children, me and pissing in the toaster) he's just spent at least an hour next to me on the sofa. He was nuzzling, nibbling and even licking me.

I never thought I'd see the day when he'd show any affection to a human. The vet hates him. My neighbours all hate him. Most people do except for the kids.

Dors this mean he luffs me? I'm gonna post a picture of the soppy get.

Tartyflette Sat 07-Nov-15 01:17:52

Pissing in the toaster? Whoa -- bit of an extreme sport, even for an animal with 9 lives! Not the sort of thing they would do more than once, I hope? -
-Although I have been known to stick a knife in the toaster to extract a slice that was stuck. DH banned me from using it after that--

Tartyflette Sat 07-Nov-15 01:18:57

Sigh. Strikeout fail again.

Verypissedoffwife Sat 07-Nov-15 01:20:44

This is him. He definitely luurves me doesn't he?

Verypissedoffwife Sat 07-Nov-15 01:22:41

Yeah he very nearly went in the canal after the toaster incident. Or for rehoming.

Hatethis22 Sat 07-Nov-15 01:28:49

He's obviously a low carb fanatic. He was only trying to save you from yourself. If you'd just have a nice omelet for breakfast everything would be fine.

Verypissedoffwife Sat 07-Nov-15 01:29:41

God even on the picture I posted of him looking soppy he looks evil.

Verypissedoffwife Sat 07-Nov-15 01:32:59

Actually I'm just looking at that photo of him and I'm back to being scared of him. He's quite clearly possessed by evil demons and that's why he pissed in the toaster.

Pipestheghost Sat 07-Nov-15 01:33:24

He's very handsome, yes he definitely looks like a cat that would piss in a toaster grin

Verypissedoffwife Sat 07-Nov-15 01:35:18

Is it just my phone? Or have I got the chucky of all cats?

Hatethis22 Sat 07-Nov-15 01:36:27

He looks like he's trying to hypnotise you.

Pipestheghost Sat 07-Nov-15 01:36:56

On closer inspection he looks like he's plotting his next move grin

Verypissedoffwife Sat 07-Nov-15 01:45:32

He's still being all cute and soppy for the first time ever. Obviously he's lulling me into a false sense of security and is most likely planning on hypnotising me with his weird eyes and then sucking my brains out. Or I've just had too much prosecco.

thecatneuterer Sat 07-Nov-15 04:25:30

Aww there's nothing better than when an ex shredder and toaster pisser suddenly realises they love you.

What's his back story?

iloveeverykindofcat Sat 07-Nov-15 06:53:58

That photo is fabulous. I got a real LOL out of it. He's very handsome. And very sinister. Clearly a sexy villain in the cat world.

GreenSand Sat 07-Nov-15 07:03:27

He looks massive!
I'm sure he thinks he's tamed you finally, and you are just going to follow his instructions from now on.

Costacoffeeplease Sat 07-Nov-15 07:04:02

We've got a toaster pisser too, although we don't know which of our 15 cats it was....all our kitchen appliances that live on the worktop now wear little covers to keep them safe

Vinorosso74 Sat 07-Nov-15 09:04:26

Pissing in the toaster! That has to be one of the funniest cat incidents. Sorry OP as I bet it wasn't at the time.
He does have a 'look' about him as if he's plotting something....

Themodernuriahheep Sat 07-Nov-15 09:14:13

He's feeling smug and confident. He's got you trained and subservient.

Verypissedoffwife Sat 07-Nov-15 09:46:02

Do you want to know how I knew he'd pissed in the toaster? For weeks I'd been bleaching the kitchen floor and Skirting boards thinking he was spraying. I'd bleach and the smell would be gone but then the next day I'd smell it again. Eventually my daughter and her friend used all 4 slots of the toaster (as opposed to the usual 2 I'd been using ) and the stench was unbelievable. To hover above a toaster placed on a worktop and beneath cupboards takes a remarkable amount of skill and dexterity.

His back story is that he was un neutered and homeless. We think he's 4 and I got him after he'd been castrated. We went to the shelter with the view to adopting one of their cute kittens but I didn't really take to them. The people at the rescue were trying to steer me towards one of the other cats. Basically any other cat than him but for some reason I just liked the look of him. He is massive but so is my other cat so to us he's just normal sized. He's a bit of a thug though.

Vinorosso74 Sat 07-Nov-15 10:02:31

Very that is grim. What a way to find out, would have put me off toast for a while! Agree it's quite a skill to aim pee directly in the toaster-smart cat.

FrancesNiadova Sat 07-Nov-15 10:18:37

He's toying with you op, analysing your vulnerabilities and planning his next move. MWAHHHAAAAAMEOWWWWWWWWW! grin

chemenger Sat 07-Nov-15 10:41:14

He is lulling you in to a false sense of security. Just saying...

There is probably a dead mouse in your bed. Or in a shoe.

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