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Need you advice please re stray Tom and rehabilitation

(16 Posts)
NewEraNewMindset Thu 21-Aug-14 14:18:22

So, last week I rescued a stray cat from the side of a slip road who was 5 mins away from certain death on a motorway. He was very weak and allowed me to pick him up where I took him to the local vet as I knew he was in too poor condition for me to do anything else really.

Local vet said they would scan for microchip and let me know what happens, but suggested a local cat charity might take him.

Fast forward to today and vet says the cat is male, needs dental work, has no chip and is very underweight and no charity has room for him. They are ringing around lots of people to see if someone would take him on. Bills would need to be paid and that would have to be organised with the vet otherwise the cat would be destroyed.

So I said I might be able to take him, then she drops the T word, he has never been neutered and Cats Protection will take care of that free if charge.

I said to her that that changed the complexion of things as to my mind he is unlikely to be litter trained. She had a word with the nurses who had been caring for him and apparently he has been using a litter tray. I said in my (vast) experience once you let the males stay Toms past kitten hood they have a tendency to spray and I know that STINKS.

Now I don't know what to do and they are going to contact me on Monday. We have brand new cream carpets throughout and I have a two year old who has already been scratched this week by my Mothers cat. I don't want to try and be the big hero by taking on this cat to then find it pees around the house and hates children. But then I feel I have dumped the responsibility into the vets by taking him in there when I could have just driven past and let whatever may have happened happen.

I feel like shit and don't know what to do.

Fluffycloudland77 Thu 21-Aug-14 14:26:37

Mine was neutered at 5 months and sprays if dh plays his guitar.

NewEraNewMindset Thu 21-Aug-14 14:28:46

Fluffy cloud that was both hilarious and depressing sad

Fluffycloudland77 Thu 21-Aug-14 14:34:58

Dh says the cat has no taste in music, I think it's the opposite.

You really don't know the personality of any cat until you've spent time with them, I do think if having a pristine house is on your to-do list then pets make it so much harder.

My mil managed it but shed keep a house nice with all limbs in plaster grin

NewEraNewMindset Thu 21-Aug-14 14:37:52

I just know that cat piss is a nightmare to eradicate as I grew up with a house that stank due to having so many cats, some with 'issues'.

My partner has pretty much ruled out him living here so really writing this thread has been pointless. I've just got the guilts although god knows why as his previous owners were the arseholes who abandoned him not me.

Fluffycloudland77 Thu 21-Aug-14 14:44:49

It's not so bad these days, bio washing powder sorts it out and it doesn't smell in our house.

He sounds like he's not the cat for you.

Corygal Thu 21-Aug-14 14:46:12

Mr Cory, my cat, was neutered at the age of 5 having been a stray since kittenhood and he doesn't spray at all. He also loves his litter tray and never has an accident.

Go for it! Your DS will love having a pet of his own.

Corygal Thu 21-Aug-14 14:47:42

Just seen your last post. Bah to your partner, but maybe you are better off without the little lad.

Corygal Thu 21-Aug-14 14:50:06

Fluffy grin

cozietoesie Thu 21-Aug-14 15:43:14

The Lodger was like Mr Cory - neutered late (although not so late as Mr C) and never sprayed in the house. He also came to love his litter tray and started using it in preference to doing his duty outside. Spraying isn't necessarily a given for a late neuter I think.

NewEraNewMindset Thu 21-Aug-14 15:50:21

Oh you are so lovely on here. I wish I didn't care about wee in the house but I really hate it. I think I'll talk to the vet on Monday as I said I could take him on as a semi feral cat and make sure he had an outside area that was dry and food. I guess then I could let him come in the house slowly so we could gauge his personality.

Having looked after horses for a long time I know they can have one character when in poor health and another less sweet personality when fit and well.

I shall update if I have one.

thecatneuterer Thu 21-Aug-14 17:14:09

Even unneutered toms use litter trays and when they spray they generally spray outside. The tomcat stink and the spraying should stop two weeks after neutering. And there is no reason at all why he should scratch your child, as long as your child doesn't torment him of course.

There is no reason why he shouldn't make a lovely cat and well done for saving his life!

I have to say though - cream carpets - what were you thinking!! With a child they are going to look like shit in a couple of months anyway, so probably having a cat won't make it any worse.

timtam23 Thu 21-Aug-14 20:12:06

The poor cat. You saved him from a horrible death - it would be so nice if he could have a second chance at a happy life (although I do understand about the wee and your partner not being keen).
Hoping you will be able to reach a compromise so that you can keep him! Outside with a dry shelter and food sounds much better that what the poor creature had before. If he's neutered, even if later than usual, as TCN says he won't smell and hopefully won't spray inside.
Did the vet have a guess at how old he is? (I'm guessing if he needs dental work he could be getting on a little)

PS I have cream/beige carpets, 2 children and have had anything between 1 and 3 cats, the carpets are now a mere shadow of their former glory but this is because of the children not the cats!

cozietoesie Thu 21-Aug-14 20:36:35

Oh - and whatever you decide, you have no reason to feel bad. You stopped to help him and you saved him from a nasty death. If you don't want to take him on longer term (although I hope you do) then you've still done much more than most people would. Hold your head up.

NewEraNewMindset Thu 21-Aug-14 20:49:59

Thanks cozie. She seemed to think he was around four years of age.

It doesn't help that they want me to take him on and pay for the vets bills he has accrued so far plus dental work. I know someone has to pay but I know nothing about the cat but do know that vets fees are expensive so I was a bit hmm

I had in my head that he might go to a charity and I could visit him, get to know him and if I thought we had a bond and I knew he was litter trained eye I could take him on. Obviously the charities are jam packed so I was living in a fantasy world as usual.

PinkSparklyElephant Fri 22-Aug-14 18:19:39

Harry was neutered at about 3 years old as he was a stray. He's never sprayed anywhere and is one of the cleanest cats I've ever known.

I hope you can come to a compromise. I don't know where you are but if you're local to me (Surrey) I have a cat kennel you could have if you could collect. We bought it when we were adopted by the local stray but he's now living in luxury with my mother and the kennel is empty.

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