How do you know when it's time and what do you actually do?

[ditavonteesed]

My older terrier is 12, she has been getting increasingly aggressive for a few years but has reached a point where she is fighting with the other dogs daily and has bitten dd and snapped at me a few times. When we saw the vets about this a while ago they said they thought she had dementia. This was maybe 2 years ago.
She is often sick, I took her to the vets but they couldn't find anything.
She wees in the house and doesn't want to go for walks anymore.
But in between times she is chilled and happy. She eats well and is still seeing and pooing fine. She also makes really weird panting heavy breathing noises most of the time, again seen the vets about this but found nothing.
I don't think it's time yet but I think it might not be long now. But how do you know and when it is time what do you actually do, I was thinking of ringing the vets tomorrow to talk about her but I have no idea what to actually say.

[PollyRoulson]

It is a difficult decision. I always ask the advice of my vet and take on board their views but also remember that you know your dog the best.

It may help to think about what your dog is not doing anymore rather than what they can do. You begin to see the small things that they are no longer able to do. Dogs are pretty reslient and by the time we can see they are suffering they will have been doing so for a while.

Re talking to the vet I would say exactly what you have said in your post.

I am sorry that you are having to think about this

[Sarahlou63]

There are two schools of thought. Keep the dog going for as long as possible, no matter what the cost to the owner and the (possible) discomfort of the dog. Or the "rather a week too soon that a day too late" theory. If the dog has no prospect of getting better then (for me) the latter option is better. Animals have no concept of death but they DO pick up on our thoughts and emotions so she will be aware of your distress, even though she doesn't know that she's causing it.

Talk to your vet about the best time. And be there with her.

[ditavonteesed]

I have an appointment tomorrow to discuss things with the vet and possibly to pts. Dh and I discussed this a lot and decided it was the best time, she seems unhappy most of the time and no longer settles just paces around. The aggression has escalated and we can't pick her up and the other dogs can't go near her. But I am second guessing myself and I thought I would feel better when I had spoken to them but I feel awful, guilty.

[GrumpyMiddleAgedWoman]

Another way of weighing it up is to consider what the dog used to enjoy and how many of those things are left.

Our old terrier was left with sunbathing and eating. She could just about manage a short, very slow walk, and she had a fairly aggressive tumour.

I still felt terrible taking her to the vet, but one the deed was done she was out of pain and discomfort and I felt alright about it. Upset, but alright.

It is a horrible decision.

[chickychicchic]

We had this decision recently.
It felt cruel because eyou are questioning if it's right or not but o ur dog was going to get worse and I thought that was unfair. He's had a good life and was starting to look like he was struggling so we made the hard decision

When I asked my friend she said it's your job to make the hard choice in their best interests as they can't do it
That helped me

[ditavonteesed]

Thank you for the kind replies, I have made a list for the vets as I am worried I will get all tongue tied and not be able to explain properly.
Will see what they advise. When it's all written down it looks bad but she still has her happy moments.

[alwayswrighty]

horribly difficult decision, but one that's inevitable

[BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

We've always gone by the better a week too soon than a day too late theory. Only once did I go against that and that one haunts me more than all the others.

Generally speaking we look at what they are no longer doing / enjoying. Is that list longer than the list of things they do / enjoy?
Are the good times outweighing the bad times?
Are they in pain? Is is manageable? This one's particularly tricky as dogs are good at hiding it.

I remember being in tears as a teenager having my dog PTS and the vet said something like
"Your dog will give you everything his story has to give. Make sure you honour that and give him a decent ending"
At the time I thought he was an idiot but now I'm older I get what he means.

[ditavonteesed]

We have spent the weekend doing a terrier bucket list, she has had the cheap toys that she isn't normally allowed to destroy, went for a lovely walk yesterday she spent the rest of the day and night refusing to move. She has had the really expensive fancy food. She is currently laid in bed with licky yoghurt.

[ditavonteesed]

The trip to the vet went better than I could have hoped for. She has something, possibly a growth in her throat but it has a lot of inflammation round it so she had an anti inflammatory injection to see if that helps. Got to see how she goes over the next week.

[alwayswrighty]

Keep us updated. Hopefully she gets better