Worried about stopping my dog sleeping on my bed after 18 months

(8 Posts)
jojojoeyjojo Sun 19-Jul-20 23:14:11

18 months ago I adopted a 2 year old rescue dog. Before he arrived I decided I wouldn't let him sleep on my bed but when he arrived he was so scared and traumatised I didn't have the heart to make him sleep on his own. I also think about dogs being pack animals so it does seem a bit unnatural for dogs to sleep alone. Now we have a strong bond and he sleeps with me every night. His confidence has come on leaps and bounds and he's a happy dog. However, for a couple of reasons I want to stop him sleeping with me. Firstly, I have terrible insomnia and restless legs and sleeping with a big dog who takes up so much room is not helping. Secondly, I have a new boyfriend who I would like, in time, to visit and stay over. There would not be room for all of us! However, I feel guilty about how this might really distress and upset my dog. I know he will cry if I stop him coming in to my bedroom at night. Has anyone ever done this and how long did it take for your dog to get used to the new arrangements? Or is it just too cruel to contemplate it? I know there will be lots of people who think it's wrong and unhygienic to have a dog on your bed in the first place and I don't want to go into the ins and outs of that debate, but would really appreciate any thoughts about what I can do now I've got myself into this situation!

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Bunnybigears Sun 19-Jul-20 23:17:15

rather than stop him coming into the room altogether I would put his bed down by the side of your bed so the transition is a lot less traumatic for him as he is only moving to beside you rather than completely away from you.

jojojoeyjojo Sun 19-Jul-20 23:22:00

Thanks that's a good suggestion..I think he will keep trying to jump up on bed but I guess I can train him and use positive reinforcement to encourage him to stay on his own bed. I'm sure he must get fed up of my tossing and turning anyway!

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Floralnomad Mon 20-Jul-20 01:48:20

Do you have a spare bedroom ? Our dog comes to bed with me every night and starts off on my bed and then I move him into his own room when I’m ready to go to sleep . He has a double bed in his room which he only has to share if our son is home .

AdoreTheBeach Mon 20-Jul-20 04:13:48

The dog bed of it own in your room is good option. Ensure he also has a fig bed in the main room if the house that he shoulda keep in while your in that room too

We had to do this with our dog. We started correctly. He had a crate. When we first got him, I slept in the sofa near the crate and soothed him when he cried. Was particularly bad for the first week, then no trouble. We had another dog who used to sleep upstairs but when we got this puppy, we had him sleep downstairs too by using a stair gate

So both dogs slept downstairs together for years. After our first dog died, suddenly our youngest was alone for the first time in his life. He was very depressed and missed our first dog - so we let him upstairs to sleep. Que years of sleepless night, bed hopping room to room, paw marks on sheets etc. We put a dog bed in one bedroom (master) and just continued to tell him to get in his bed and go to sleep. To start, he’s get on the bed, we would repeatedly the commands. Same words, firm but nice tone. Over time it has worked. He now sleeps in this bed. We all sleep better.

As mentioned, we have a dog bed in our main room downstairs. We started to ensure he used that too. So during dinner, he’s told to go to his bed (we feed him just before we eat). So he’s now used to going to his bed command (also stops begging for food, the stare down for food).

jojojoeyjojo Mon 20-Jul-20 08:42:31

That's really helpful thank you adorethebeach.

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RunningFromInsanity Mon 20-Jul-20 10:58:48

I stopped my dog sleeping on my bed after a while and it wasn’t as traumatic as I expected. I put his bed on the floor, and sent him to bed. Unfortunately he would then wait till I was asked and climb on the bed.

So I put a baby gate up at my bedroom door and put his bed the other side. There was a little bit of huffing and sighing but he took to it pretty quickly.

Now he sleeps on my bedroom floor again, and only comes on the bed when asked.

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jojojoeyjojo Mon 20-Jul-20 15:24:30

Thank you runningfrominsanity that is reassuring smile

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