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Is it time?(12 Posts)
My old boy is only 12 but he's got multiple health problems. Cushings Disease (for three years), dementia, arthritis etc, etc
We are keeping him comfortable on a combination of around £200 of drugs a month. It's not about the money though, I'd pay anything to make him comfortable. But that's a lot of medication for a dog that's just existing.
He can still manage to get upstairs to bed, coming down is difficult. He pees on the floor every few days but still goes outside 95% of the time. He does get anxious and shakes for no reason and we have to comfort/distract him.
The big issue is that he wanders and gets scared at night. We have Xanax to keep him calm at night but it doesn't really work. My DH is now up and down all night (in a separate bedroom to keep the dog enclosed) tending to him. My DH is sleep deprived. This has been going on for over a year.
The boy still wags his tail and enjoys eating but my DH is so tired, we all are. All this nightly commotion wakes the kids up too. We can no longer go out as a family as one of us has to be at home with the boy as he gets too stressed on his own.
I feel dreadful at the thought of PTS as he still wags and likes his food but something has to give. My poor DH is broken from this, should I insist that the dog needs to be PTS to save DH.
I'd love to hear an external opinion as we're too invested in the situation to be rational. Help?
You said it yourself that he is just existing. To wait until he no longer wags his tail or likes his food is waiting until there is no joy left which I wouldn't want to do.
So sorry but it does sound like it is time
I agree with Bitey, it really sounds like the time has come.
It really is all about quality of life for dogs, not just existing.
Still being able to wag his tail and enjoy his food isn't enough imo.
What would really decide it for me, apart from the affect on your DH, who sounds absolutely lovely btw, is the anxiety and fear your dog is experiencing.
I think it must be terrible to live with fear night after night and you can't explain or talk to a dog about it, he just keeps it all inside his head.
It really sounds like the very kindest thing would be to let him go now
Thank you, I honestly felt worried that we are considering this for our own convenience. Seeing another point of view helps me to see that it's better for the dog. We love him so much it's hard to draw a line.
The best advice I've ever heard about how to decide if it's time to PTS or not is to think about what the dog used to enjoy and what it has left. I'd also weigh what is left against pain, illness and distress.
A phrase that really helped me was 'it's better to go a day too soon than an hour too late'. It sounds like you've gone above and beyond and your dog will know he is loved beyond measure. It sounds like it is time to take the final step with him. it is so hard.
Oh I’m so sorry OP. But nothing about your post says you’re considering this for your “convenience”. Nothing at all.
Existing isn’t living. I agree it’s so hard to know precisely when to PTS. When we had to let our old cat go the vet said it wasn’t about whether an animal was suffering but about dignity. That clinched it for me.
I'm so sorry. Your DH sounds like a hero, but this fight is one that can't be won - it's like trying to hold back the tide. You're right, at some point you have to decide that it's time, and it sounds like it's been reached.
I think it's time to let him go.
Thanks everyone, you've echoed what I was thinking. It's just more difficult when you're attached to the dog isn't it? An outside view helps to put some perspective on it.
My DH adores to dog, but even he has agreed to call time. The dog himself is chilling outside in the sunshine and seems totally content, but nights are another matter. I'll give my vet a call 😔
It's a brave decision op. It's better to let them go while there's still some enjoyment there, how awful it would be to wait until life was a complete misery. This is the best he's ever going to be. for you.
Not an easy decision to make OP but it's the right one, I think.