Please help - night 1, 2 and 3 he cried on and off. Night 4 he cried louder, longer and pooped in his crate...

(48 Posts)
Leapoffaith00 Wed 30-Oct-19 09:23:58

We have an 8 week cockapoo. He was used to being created with his brothers and sisters. He appeared to be ok going in and out of it when he came home, even slept in it for little naps. We have let him play in it. I have a pen for night time with puppy pads. He wasn't even using them on the first few nights as we took him out regularly for a wee and a poop. Then straight away at 5.30am. Settled him at 10.30.
I'm going back to work Monday and my dad is popping in to see him. I'm worried about him crying to the extent of pooping again. He was covered in it and I have completely washed everything in his crate this morning and he has had a bath.
What do I do? I am just clueless to know what to do for the best.

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Branleuse Wed 30-Oct-19 09:30:13

He was used to being with other dogs. He is terrified and lonely. Is he even in the same room as you?

Leapoffaith00 Wed 30-Oct-19 09:32:46

No, he is downstairs. I wouldn't mind if he slept upstairs but there is no room at all for a crate and pen.

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dancemom Wed 30-Oct-19 09:38:52

Are you planning on leaving him alone all day?

Leapoffaith00 Wed 30-Oct-19 09:43:45

No, my dad is calling in on the days I work (3days) and my 2 dd's are home at 3pm. I'm off 4 out of 7 days so will be home.
I just don't know how to approach this now. I want to do the right thing for him but I don't want to crate desperation anxiety as he will be left at times.

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beenrumbled Wed 30-Oct-19 09:48:19

Was last night his first night with you? What advice did the breeder give for settling? You may need to see if there is anyway you can re organise your upstairs so the crate can come up overnight.

He will need someone with him most of the day for the next few weeks/months - for house training etc. Is your dad going to be spending a few hours each day at your house?

Speak to your vet or a dog trainer for advice. You might find some information on the Dogs Trust Dog School website.

Leapoffaith00 Wed 30-Oct-19 09:52:40

Yes, my dad will call in and spend time here. I'm putting puppy pads down in a pen. I know this will prolong training but I don't have a choice as I have to work. On my days off I will train him. It will be slower but I'm sure it will be ok as I have read that.
I might have to sleep on the sofa as there is no room upstairs to rearrange furniture otherwise I would definitely do this.

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Leapoffaith00 Wed 30-Oct-19 09:53:19

Ps thankyou will ask. Do vets mind giving free advice?

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Lougle Wed 30-Oct-19 09:54:33

Are you planning to leave your 8 week old puppy for several hours? That's not a good idea, tbh. Could your Dad have the puppy at his house on the days you work?

AnnaFiveTowns Wed 30-Oct-19 09:55:01

So you're thinking of leaving him in the crate when you go back to work? Or have I got this wrong.

AnnaFiveTowns Wed 30-Oct-19 09:56:01

If so, you really should not have got a puppy in he first place.

Keepaddingpets Wed 30-Oct-19 10:00:46

Most dog trainers don't recommend using puppy pads as it send them a mixed message like it's fine to wee in the house sometime - they don't understand the rules.

Also make their nighttime crate really small. If the crate is big then they will often poo in it especially at the other end to their bed. A small crate - just enough for them to lie down will help with that. Obviously for daytime the crate needs to be bigger but again if crated for long periods during the day it will just confuse the poor pup.

Puppies need almost co stand supervision at that age. Think you're going to struggle and it's not fair on the dog.

Leapoffaith00 Wed 30-Oct-19 10:01:39

I would really appreciate some advice re the question....
Puppy will be home from 8.30 -3pm so 6 hours. My dad will call in and spend a couple of hours at 10.30 - 12.30. So pup will be alone 2 hours alone with a pen and crate left open. Puppy pads. That's 2 days a week. 3rd day he will go to my older daughters house for the day as she doesn't work a Friday.
I have made the right decision to get a puppy. That's your opinion. I would really appreciate some helpful advice re the question I have asked.

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beenrumbled Wed 30-Oct-19 10:04:23

My vet is happy to chat and give what advice he can - but we have a good relationship with him. What did your vet say when you took him for his first puppy check?

Several vets in our area offer puppy socialisation groups, and give advice there. There is a charge for that though most people feel its been worth it, and just meant a bit more spent on the training side they had already planned for, classes etc when the dog is older.

Have you spoken to the breeder about your concerns and how distressed the pup was? Most decent breeders will be able to give you some hints and tips.

But to avoid any issues you may need to speak to a qualified behaviourist/trainer - especially as you are concerned about separation anxiety and have to go back to work so soon.

Lougle Wed 30-Oct-19 10:05:37

"I'm going back to work Monday and my dad is popping in to see him. I'm worried about him crying to the extent of pooping again."

Your statement. He's an 8 week old puppy. Of course he's going to cry when he's left alone all day. You've answered your own question. We're telling you that your plan is not good for the dog. You can choose to disagree.

beenrumbled Wed 30-Oct-19 10:11:23

This might be helpful www.dogstrustdogschool.org.uk/behaviour/separation-anxiety/development-of-separation-anxiety/

Leapoffaith00 Wed 30-Oct-19 10:18:15

Ok, thanks for your post. I have spoken to many pet owners and this is common at the beginning. People have pups every day and work, some full time. That's why I'm here, posting, I am hoping to manage this without distress.
Thankyou, I will take a look. Appreciate your help.

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OrchidInTheSun Wed 30-Oct-19 10:20:47

You cannot housetrain a puppy if you leave it alone for long periods

Leapoffaith00 Wed 30-Oct-19 10:24:10

11beenrumbled just read that and it's helpful. Thankyou

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YogaDrone Wed 30-Oct-19 10:31:11

We took leave when we first got our puppy and after that initial period one of us worked from home each day so the puppy was never alone.

The first few nights she cried in her crate and one of us ended up sleeping on the sofa in the same room. That seemed to be all she needed to settle. We ended up sleeping on the sofa bed for several weeks until eventually she took herself off to her bed in the utility room and that's where she's slept ever since.

Most people I know crack and puppy ends up sleeping in their bedroom smile But that's a hard habit to then crack.

You can't leave a puppy for several hours at a time in the early days though OP. You'll never get him/her housetrained and they love to chew things so you'll come home to a wrecked house!

Warmhandscoldheart Wed 30-Oct-19 10:31:13

Cover the crate with a blanket leaving only the door end visible, some dogs feel more secure in dens.

Leapoffaith00 Wed 30-Oct-19 11:10:22

Thankyou - he has a pen with puppy pads. I don't have a choice, I need to work. I work part time so 4 out of 7 I'm home to train. I have read it just takes longer.
I haven't been for a health check yet. That's on the 24th November when he has vaccinations.
I might try sleeping down stairs.

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adaline Wed 30-Oct-19 12:18:01

I'm sorry OP but I'm another that's saying that's far far too long to leave an eight week old puppy. Mine is nearly two and he still wouldn't cope with that amount of time alone each day.

We took a month off between us to settle ours down and then he went to daycare. He now spends the day with my FIL while we work so he has company and someone who can walk him or let him out to the toilet when he needs to go.

I think your plan to go back to work on Monday and leave an eight week old alone for that length of time is unachievable and massively unfair on the pup.

Branleuse Wed 30-Oct-19 12:44:45

So hes alone several hours in the day, and alone in a cage in another room all night long? You also expect him not to cry and not to shit himself.
Hes a baby. Im not sure whos interest this is in, cos its certainly not the dogs. First puppy?

Branleuse Wed 30-Oct-19 12:45:42

You can get older dogs that are far better at being left alone for a few hours. You are going to end up with a nightmare dog

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