Dog walking altercation

(15 Posts)
Beagled Tue 29-Oct-19 10:36:41

Out walking with my dog this morning. We approached two dogs who I know my dog is scared of. My dog Is very nervous of certain dogs and starts to show signs of fear so I move him off the path and away from the dogs. These two dogs pull over to mine. They are very noisy dogs so I can’t say for sure what happened but my dog yelped. I pulled him away and the other owner said ‘don’t give me dirty looks’ I said you shouldn’t let your dogs jump at mine who is clearly scared and ’ve clearly moved away from you’. The other owner said ‘oh f** off’. I said ‘don’t tell me to F off, you F off. I’ve done nothing wrong and I’m trying to protect my dog who is already scared and one day he’s going to react to the fear and bite’. Now I’m not 100% sure but I’m 90% sure he said something along the lines of ‘I’ll bite you if it carries on’. At this point I overreacted and said ‘you’re going to bite me? You should be ashamed of yourself you absolutely disgusting arse I’ve got my child with me, who does that?!’. He said ‘you’re swearing at me telling me to F off, don’t tell me to f off’ I said you told me to ‘f off then said you’d bite me’ he didn’t deny it but didn’t admit it either. I walked away.

Now I’m well aware I escalated this. I shouted and swore back, which he clearly didn’t like 🙄 However I never said anything in the first place, and I also didn’t intend on it. It was just another incident of my dog getting scared by other dogs, but I’ve obviously given the man a dirty look and then this happened.

Aside from walking a different route (which is difficult at this time of year with the dark mornings) how do I manage this going forward? I’m not scared of this man but don’t want to subject my child to another incident. And I don’t want to escalate it further as we see him every morning.

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Beagled Tue 29-Oct-19 10:38:33

Just to add just further up we bumped into two other regular walkers who said the bloke had abit of a rough time this morning with other dogs jumping at his and all the dogs were abit jigged up. However I hadn’t been involved in that at all

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notmytea Tue 29-Oct-19 10:42:38

I'd continue walking your route and just ignore him if you meet him, if he tries to engage just say something like "sorry, I'm not going to get involved, have a good day" and walk away.

I would talk to other walkers and see if they know of him too just so others are aware.

adaline Tue 29-Oct-19 11:30:35

Best thing to do with people like that is just avoid and ignore.

Floralnomad Tue 29-Oct-19 11:36:18

You sound as bad as each other , infact you are probably worse because you are swearing and getting involved when you have a child with you . Either ignore him in future or walk somewhere different - disgusting behaviour from all involved .

Beagled Tue 29-Oct-19 11:49:19

Seriously? I’m as bad as him for standing up for myself instead of allowing him to swear at me and saying he’ll bite me!!

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missbattenburg Tue 29-Oct-19 11:50:10

You seem to be suggestion those other dogs were close enough to nip at yours and that this may have caused the yelp?

If they were that close then they are far, far too close for your dog who is nervous of them. As your dog's owner, you need to ensure your dog has enough space that he is ok. With two dogs that he is nervous of this is likely to be several metres away.

In reality this probably means turning down a side street or back the way you came, before they get too close.

Failure to do this will risk your dog's fear and reactions escalating. Regardless of the rights and wrongs wrt the other owner, it'll be you that has to live with a reactive dog if that happens.

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Beagled Tue 29-Oct-19 11:55:35

Yeah I think in hindsight I should have gone on the other side as it’s a bigger space. We were on a path with grass either side. I moved over to the right and moved as far over as I could (by the hedge). The dogs pulled the owner over to us. I will however next time just completely bypass and go to the right and further away. I assumed this was a clear enough message but he let them come over anyway.

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Floralnomad Tue 29-Oct-19 12:18:38

Yes , because in your narrative he firstly told you to fuck off , if that had been me out with my dog and a presumably small child I would have said ‘charming’ and walked on whereas your response was ‘don’t tell me to fuck off , you fuck off ‘ . That’s way to many fucks to be heard by a child in my care IMO .

Neron Tue 29-Oct-19 12:19:56

You've assumed your dog was bitten, even though you admitted you didn't see what happened. You've also had a bit of an attitude with the other owner for them to mention your dirty look? You can't be indignant about their behaviour in front of your child when you acted the same? I'm not judging you OP, we do things in the moment, just it isn't all their fault.
I look after my boy and I would stand up for him if I needed to, but if you knew he didn't like those dogs then why not turn back? My boy is dog aggressive, I'll always turn back/cross over the road etc hell I've even picked him up too many times to count to difuse a situation. I don't want drama, I want a nice walk.

fikel Tue 29-Oct-19 12:21:44

Keep an eye out and can always turn around if you see him but not sure f ing and blinding is a great response in front of children

adaline Tue 29-Oct-19 12:22:31

I also think if you have a reactive or nervous dog, then you need to be really clear about that with other people. I often shout out to approaching walkers "sorry, he's nervous" while I'm getting mine to sit at the side of the road while they pass.

Remember, you are your dogs advocate. You need to do whatever's necessary to stop him panicking.

MrGsFancyNewVagina Tue 29-Oct-19 12:28:38

I wonder if the people you met actually witnessed his dogs being harassed or did they just believe his story. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if his dogs had already went for another couple of dogs but he’s trying to make it seem like he’s the victim. If he can’t hold back two potentially aggressive dogs then he shouldn’t be walking them together.

You did react strongly, but I can understand why you were so upset, especially as you’d moved away from him. Don’t worry OP, we’ve all lost it at some time. Even the perfect posters that are telling you off.

MrGsFancyNewVagina Tue 29-Oct-19 12:30:07

Btw, you can get yellow coats with writing on that says keep back, nervous dog, etc.

Beagled Tue 29-Oct-19 12:31:32

My dog yelped but i didn’t say he was bit, don’t know if it was fear or if he was hurt. Or if it was just noise, as I say these other dogs are very noisy. I didn’t even realise I’d given the man a dirty look, I t was intentional and apparantly he’d had a rough morning with his dogs which is why he reacted. I know i escalated the situation by responding In the heat of the moment

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