Training Ddog to sleep downstairs alone, help?

[Lovemusic33]

Me again, please be gentle as I seem to get a lot of hassle when I ask for advice. I am asking for advise because I am desperate. I know I have created a rod for my own back with this one.

Ddog came to me 7 weeks ago, for the first few days I slept downstairs with him, planning to eventually leave him alone at night. I tried him in a crate but he kept peeing in and on it whenever it was in the room, the same with a dog bed. I was then ill and was taken into hospital for 4 days so someone else had to look after him, they slept on the sofa with him. When I got home after surgery I needed to be in bed so to make life easy (so I didn’t have a mess to clear up in the morning) I allowed Ddog to sleep on the bed. I now want to move him to sleeping downstairs.

I have been preparing him by sleeping back downstairs with him, making him sleep on his blanket and not on me, I have been using a old duvet to sleep on to give in my scent to leave out for the dog. Last night I decided to leave Ddog alone, it didn’t go well, he whined on and off all night, he pooped, he wee’d and finally he vomited . I did come down to remove the poo, didn’t make a fuss or verbalise with him, I then left the back door open to give him access to the garden but he continued to whine. I am now downstairs with him and he’s fast asleep (on his blanket) but I haven’t fussed him.

Where do I go from here? How do I reward him for being quiet? As soon as I move in bed he starts to whine again so by the time I would get to him I would be rewarding for whining? Do I just leave him for a short time and then return? But again I would then be rewarding the whining?

I want my bed back, I have a new partner who would like to stay over but there’s no way the dog would allow him to share the bed. Also the cat likes to share my bed, it’s his safe place away from the dog and I want that time with the cat.

Please help, and be gentle, I have had hardly any sleep

[Lovemusic33]

Just to add, Ddog is fine being left for a few hours during the day with access to the garden and living room, he only whines when I’m in the house. Whines if I leave the room to go upstairs for a bath or to do housework.

[Iamenough]

Sounds like the dog has trained you. When he whines you show up! So he calls... you come!

If your bed is important I would move dog bed / blanket closer to your bed then slowly move him downstairs over a week or so. Put something that smells of you in his bed as a comforter.

When he whines firm voice 'No'.
Put puppy pads down incase of accidents. Is dog house trained in the day?

It's time you show dog ur incharge!!

Good luck

[Lovemusic33]

Thanks lame, we have tried getting him to sleep on his blanket in my room but he won’t. He lies across the middle of my bed taking up most of the bed 🤣, I don’t think I would mind so much if he just curled up at the bottom of the bed but he seems to think he’s human.

I did leave him to whine all night apart from picking up the poo (so I came down once), he hardly settled at all. He is a rescue and has never been on his own, was kept with 7 other dogs so being alone is probably very scary? He’s also very attached to me, I think I need to get the dd’s more involved with things like feeding so he doesn’t just see me as his human. I know it’s probably going to take a long time.

[Lovemusic33]

He is 99% house trained during the day but does have open access to the garden unless it’s raining, will occasionally pee inside if the door is shut or if anxious. Last night he pooped, he had been before bed so I’m pretty sure he did it due to anxiety or to get me to come down.

[missbattenburg]

Does he settle on his own/take himself off to another room to settl during the day?

[Floralnomad]

Can he not sleep in with one of your daughters ?

[Jouska]

I hope you have got over you operation op and are feeling better


Does your dog have a comfy bed? His bed needs to be as comfy warm as yours. When that is set up you need to encourage all daytime naps in his bed.

You say he whines and you went to him - what would happen if you left him for a short while - does he get worse or has he ever stopped whining on his own?

If it escalates and he gets really distressed I guess you will have to be back sleeping in his room and gradually move further away each night.

If he does settle after a short time and does not get too distressed then I would wait it out for a while.

Some dogs tend to have a "Need" whine and a "want" whine. A need whine I will always deal with conservatively to stop it getting worse but sometimes a "want" whine can be ignored. eg my collie originally whined and hassled me to get me to give him his ball - that behaviour was totally ignored, if he is still and calm he will get the ball.

So if your dog has a comfy warm bed, been fed exercised etc and just wants you attention. I would ignore. If however he is getting truly upset on his own I would go back to sleeping with him in his room and he is his bed and gradually increase the distance.


All that is much easier said than done at 2.00 in the morning! What ever you decide to do be consistent and stick at it. - It could easily get a bit worse before it gets better that is normal.

[Lovemusic33]

missbatenburg no, not really, he will take himself off into the garden if I’m in the living room and will lie out there alone but if he hears me move he will come and look for me. He doesn’t like it if I go upstairs for a bath of go into the kitchen to cook (I have a gate on the living room as I’m worried someone will let him out the front door, we are near a busy road).

Flora he would have a field day in dd1’s messy room and would also try and eat the hamster, my other daughter has severe autism and she wouldn’t want him on her bed .

jouska we have tried several beds but he just cocks his leg on them or destroys them, I tried giving him his own duvet last night thinking if I made it similar to my bed he might like it but he didn’t, he peed on his blanket last night. I didn’t go to him when he whined, he stayed downstairs alone all night and only shut up for 30 minutes maximum, I only went down once to pick the poo up as I could smell it upstairs, I didn’t look at him or fuss over him, just picked up the poo and returned to my bed, he basically cried all night , he’s now tired and has slept most of the day whilst I have been doing housework. I will walk him again later today in hope he’s tired for bed time. I think I will try again tonight but maybe leave him for a hour and then return, build it up to a longer time each night?