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The doghouse

My dog died

44 replies

NotJustaDog · 21/07/2019 17:03

He died on Wednesday. He had a very aggressive tumour on his head. He went in to surgery and didn't come back out. The vet told us it was kinder to not wake him up as it was worse than anyone expected.

I was at work and I didn't get to say goodbye properly. I didn't expect he would die on that day. I knew he was ill but I thought that when it was time we would get to choose when to say goodbye. I thought we would have a little more time together.

I went to see his body after I finished work. He was a big dog but he just seemed so tiny. I stroked him and rubbed his ears and I just felt like he would wake up at any time. I really wanted him to. It was so hard leaving him behind, I just wanted to pick him up and carry him home.

I know he's gone but I feel like if I just shout his name he will come running.

His favourite spot to sleep was outside my bedroom door. I've put his collar there and I say hello every time I pass it, just like I would say hello to him when he was there.

The house feels so empty and quiet. It is the worst feeling coming home and not having him greet me.

I haven't tidied away any of his things. His bed is still there, his food, his lead, his toys. I keep looking at all his usual snoozing spots and I feel so... surprised that he's not there and then I start crying again.

He was such a wonderful dog. He adored people. He was very polite and very, very gentle. Although he did believe he was a lap dog! He made me feel safe when my anxiety was bad. He looked after the children. And the cats! He used to hold a pillow or a bit of blanket in his mouth and we called it his doidy. When he was very happy he would twist his body around my legs and wag his tail so hard. He liked skyping with my family! He was a very picky eater but would do anything for a yorkshire pudding or a toast crust. He was just so kind and so loving.

I miss him so much.

He was not just a dog. He was a cherished, loved, and respected family member.

OP posts:
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BiteyShark · 21/07/2019 17:11

I'm so sorry Thanks

They definitely are a cherished member of the family and greatly missed Sad

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DramaAlpaca · 21/07/2019 17:13

I'm very sorry Flowers

What a beautiful tribute to him you have written. He sounds amazing. A big to you.

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Yellowweatherwarning · 21/07/2019 17:14

You were both lucky to have shared such a special relationship. If you feel up to it op maybe we could have a glimpse of your boy?
As an only dc my ddog was my sibling. Never just a ddog..
They are rarely just a ddog ..

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Sooverthemill · 21/07/2019 17:15

Oh I'm so sorry. Devastating to lose a dog and so sad you didn't say goodbye. He sounds absolutely lovely. X

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cantthinkofanythingwitty · 21/07/2019 17:20

Your post has made me cry. I am so sad that you didn't get to say goodbye. It is obvious that you loved him so much and gave him a lovely lovely life. I'm really sorry for your loss

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GreigLaidlawsbarofsoap · 21/07/2019 17:23

I'm also welling up, you write of him with such love. He will have had a wonderful, wonderful life with you because of that love. I'm so sorry for your loss and remember only too well the empty feeling, all I can say is it does get a little easier with time and now we talk about our memories of our first dog with such affection. Yes they are family.

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NotJustaDog · 21/07/2019 17:28

Thank you, everyone. I just needed to put my feelings out there, to people who will understand.

I'm so sad I wasn't there to hold him. I hope that he knew how much all of us loved him and that he is at peace now.

I will add two of my favourite pictures of him. One when he was a puppy (so curious and eager!) and one as an older dog, looking very regal in my opinion, on one of our favourite walks.

He was all elegant and poised when he walked but he looked so goofy when he was running, his big ears flapping about, like he would achieve lift off at any moment!

My dog died
My dog died
OP posts:
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Sooverthemill · 21/07/2019 17:29

He was gorgeous

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MLMhun · 21/07/2019 17:35

Gorgeous dog, I’m so sorry for your loss,

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NotJustaDog · 21/07/2019 17:37

I wish I could I bury my face in his lovely soft fur one last time.

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fourquenelles · 21/07/2019 17:38

What a beautiful tribute and such a handsome boy. He knew that he was loved and would have passed in no pain. I am so sorry Flowers

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Livebythecoast · 21/07/2019 17:46

That made me cry - what a beautiful dog.
I'm so sorry Flowers

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Mumteedum · 21/07/2019 17:48

Your post made me cry. I lost my old boy this year. Its hard but gets easier bit by bit. It's lovely you can post his pic and feel happy at his memory as much as it hurts. He would know he was loved xx

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ThomasFurious · 21/07/2019 17:52

I'm so sorry. He is gorgeous.

I'm sorry you didn't get to say goodbye. x

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truthisarevolutionaryact · 21/07/2019 17:54

What a beautiful dog OP. And what a lovely post about him.
Flowers

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ChardonnaysPrettySister · 21/07/2019 17:55

I'm so sorry OP.

What lovely dog he was.

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Veterinari · 21/07/2019 17:55

I'm so sad I wasn't there to hold him. I hope that he knew how much all of us loved him and that he is at peace now.

Trust me OP the vet and nurses would have given him a good scratch behind the ears as his anaesthetic was induced. It’s awful not to be there - one of my dog’s was PTS’d under anaesthesia when she needed emergency surgery whilst I was overseas. But it’s better that they dob’t Wake up when they’re so sick, and whilst it’s horribly sudden for us, it’s the best thing for them Flowers

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Bookworm4 · 21/07/2019 17:57

Your handsome boy had a life full of love and he will have known that. Take comfort from the wonderful life you gave him xx
Rest easy lovely boy 🐶❤️

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MrsMozartMkII · 21/07/2019 17:57

I'm so sorry.

A hug from me.

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QOD · 21/07/2019 17:58

I’m so sorry 💐

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Arsenicinthesugarbowl · 21/07/2019 18:05

Oh OP I know just how you feel. My dog was PTS a few days ago. I took great comfort from being around people who know what it’s like to lose a dog and folks on here have been so kind. They are so much more than our pets aren’t they? Proper family members every one of them. My daughter has put his favourite ball on the shelf in her room and it’s all I can do not to burst into tears when I see it. We have kept his lead on the door and his blanket there for the time being as I like to see his things even though it’s sad. It’s an odd feeling not to take him out or for him to be there when we come home. My dog was old and in pain so I think I’m more at peace with the loss.
I’m sorry you didn’t get to say that last goodbye but know that he loved you every moment of the happy life you gave him. Flowers to you.

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ChardonnaysPrettySister · 21/07/2019 18:09

I keep the old collars and a lock of hair. Sometimes I come across them and they make me cry.

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LickYouLikeACrispPacket · 21/07/2019 18:16

I’m so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful dog and the way you speak of him paints a great picture of life with him.

They leave such a big hole when it’s their time to go. 💐

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Jupiter13 · 21/07/2019 18:49

I'm so sorry for your loss.😢

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stucknoue · 21/07/2019 18:57

Thanks hugs

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