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The doghouse

How long after losing your dog did you decide to get another?

30 replies

Lovemusic33 · 03/06/2019 14:11

Following on from my thread the other day where our lovely dog was PTS. I know I am grieving, we miss her so much. I have always had a dog around and the house just feels empty. I’m a single mum and only work part time so have a lot of free time to walk etc..

People keep talking to me like it’s a bonus she’s gone as it means we can go away without having to rush back or arrange a dog sitter, she hated going in the car so could never take her with us. I do see people’s point but I do not go away often and the places we do go too are dog friendly (camping) so as long as a dog is happy to travel they could come with us. I walk a lot so would like a dog to come with me, seems odd without one.

How long after losing your dog did you look at getting another? Did you rescue or go for a pup? I don’t want a puppy and feel rescue would be our best option to find a dog that likes to travel and has the right temperament.

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CMOTDibbler · 03/06/2019 14:16

I foster pups for a rescue, so I meet a lot of people getting a dog. Of those who have lost one, it varies from those who have literally phoned up the week after to a couple of years gap.
My last puppy went to a couple who had lost theirs 2 years ago and said they had thought of doing all the things without a dog and then realised that they liked their life that way

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mumsiedarlingrevolta · 03/06/2019 14:16

First-sorry for your loss-
and as for the new pup-
Actually shockingly soon in hindsight.

I was saying absolutely not while spending evenings looking at rescue pages...

We did end up with a puppy-timing was right-need hypoallergenic breed due to DC severe health issues and it seemed to fall into place as if it were meant to be. Once DD said "it doesn't feel like home without a dog" I was a goner.

I also wanted a dog for long walks etc and we live in a busy town now so pup extremely well socialised with ppl and dogs. She has been a delight. Good luck. x

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Corrag · 03/06/2019 14:17

We waited 3 months after losing our boy. To be honest I'd have preferred to wait longer but my other half felt bereft without a "pal" so I gave in to a rescue who is now the apple of my eyes and the best medicine in the world. Ultimately, I think you just need do what feels right for you. If you feel ready now, go for it.

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RavenLG · 03/06/2019 14:20

I'm sorry for your loss. I don't think there is a set time, but you'll know when you're ready. My childhood dog passed away and my dad said never again, he was heartbroken when he died. However he did end up with a new dog about 10 months later. The house didn't feel like a home (plus I moved away to uni so probably felt extra empty).
If you ever get feelings of "It's too soon to replace them" remind yourself you're not replacing them, you're just providing a brilliant life for another pup who deserves love.

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Lovemusic33 · 03/06/2019 14:52

My home doesn’t feel right without a dog but then there’s never not been a dog here. The day she was PTS I told myself I couldn’t get another and go through that pain again but she did give us 12 happy years and loads of good memories, she was a pain in the bum and the fact she hated the car did make things tricky, she also hated staying at anyone else’s house so we could only go away if someone stayed in our house with her. If we get another it will be a rescue that has been car tested and cat tested. I don’t think I could deal with the puppy stage again and all the training. Would ideally like a dog that’s a year or 2 old.

I have emailed one rescue telling them my situation and saying what I am looking for in a dog, I told them I am willing to wait for the right match. I don’t want to be forced into adopting a dog that is not suitable.

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bengalcat · 03/06/2019 14:54

On my first dog as an adult and she’s still alive . However have had cats all my adult life and as soon as one dies / PTS etc I agree it leaves a void and one I filled by going straight out and getting another . Sorry for your loss .

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Two4Tuesday · 03/06/2019 15:00

So sorry for your loss Thanks

As a PP said, there is no "right time" - just when you think you are ready.

We had to get my childhood dog PTS when I was 19 and both of my parents swore "never again". But very quickly they felt like the house wasn't a home anymore. Two weeks later, we rescued another dog out of our local pound, and he's still bouncing strong a decade later.

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Mouldiwarp1 · 03/06/2019 15:54

Much sooner than I expected or planned. DDog died in March. My initial reaction was that I’d not be ready to get another dog for at least a year. What I didn’t expect though was how much I’d not only miss my boy himself, but how much I’d miss having a dog generally - or as someone said to me, another heartbeat in the house. It’s strange the way you sense their presence even in another room.

New puppy arrives in two weeks. Yes, we decided to go through it all again - and I can’t wait!

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CarolDanvers · 03/06/2019 15:59

A month. Too soon really but having a dog had been a huge part of our lives for 15 years. Things just felt wrong without one. His was the second litter we saw and I drove away with him thinking what have I done? It was the right thing to do though and three years on i have no regrets. I'm a single parent and my dog is my companion and friend. I'd find it very hard to be without a dog in my life.

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Fillypants · 03/06/2019 16:15

Have made sure, we've never been without one (or should I say multiple(, couldn't bear it and it's made it much easier to deal with!

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Lovemusic33 · 03/06/2019 16:33

Mould that’s exactly how I feel, of course I am upset that she’s gone but I think I’m finding the fact there’s no dog in the house harder. I knew she wasn’t going to be around much longer and although it happened quite quickly it wasn’t a total shock. I had my mums dog stay last night as they went away for a night and just having a dog around made me feel much better.

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Lovemusic33 · 03/06/2019 16:34

Filly I have considered that option (having more than one) 😁

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user1471453601 · 03/06/2019 16:45

It was six months for us. As others have said, a house doesn't feel like home without an animal.

We went the rescue rout. Another Staffy but seven years old. We've had her a year and she hold my heart in the palm of her paw. She's very different from our previous staffy (who was frightened of no one and nothing and took affection on her terms). This little one is quite timid and want constant affection and attention. I loved our first one, but this one just melts my heart

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Lovemusic33 · 03/06/2019 17:05

user my girl was a staffie, she was totally bonkers until she reached ten years old but the most loyal dog, my shadow. I’m very tempted to get another staff but most of the rescues seem to say ‘not good with cats’.

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Grinchly · 03/06/2019 18:53

Really good question. My heart dog died, then followed a year later by our other gorgeous dog.

That was the crunch and the second year was worse than the first.

Situ is complex, but if circumstances had allowed I would have looked for another dog shortly after death of d dog 2 .

For me a dog less house is no place to be. I tried - borrowing other people's dogs, but not the same.

I realised I preferred the dog things to the non dog things really.

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Olliver27 · 03/06/2019 20:16

We've always been a multi dog household but when I lost my little dog who I took everywhere with me, I went to view a litter of pups in rescue the next day and took one home a few days later. With my bigger dogs, I've rarely gone out looking for one but rather the dogs find us through rescue contacts. I try to stick to 3/4 large dogs and 1 small dog at a time, as this allows me space to take emergency fosters.

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Almostflownthenest · 03/06/2019 21:14

So sorry for your loss. When our beautiful boy was pts we got a pup 3 months later. I hated the empty house after 15 and a half years with our ddog. Dh probably would have waited longer but I won!

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spiderlight · 04/06/2019 10:24

We lost our old boy in January. We then had about six weeks of prescheduled major building work on the house, but throughout that my DS was asking whether we'd have a dog in time for his birthday in mid-March. He'd never known a home without dogs so he was bereft. Just as the building work was finishing, a friend who fosters for a local rescue posted a pic of her latest foster, a gorgeous cocker spaniel whose owners had had to give him up because of a change in circumstances. Long story short, we went for a walk with her on the Sunday, had our homecheck on the Monday and he came home on the Tuesday. It was a gap of about two months and in some ways it felt too soon, but none of us felt right without a dog here and he's made such a difference to my DS. We'd had two close family bereavements as well as losing our old boy but Ed is helping us to smile again.

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mrsjoyfulprizeforraffiawork · 04/06/2019 14:54

People keep talking to me like it’s a bonus she’s gone as it means we can go away without having to rush back or arrange a dog sitter,

Yes, I had this too two and a half years ago after having to have my lovely old rescue girl PTS after a long while of increasing health issues. I agreed, in priniciple, that it was more sensible to do a few long trips abroad or whatever I hadn't been able to do because of dog commitments, before thinking of another, BUT I had a dog-shaped hole in my home and I couldn't stop looking at rescue dogs available online. My parrot was very sad too and I found myself sitting with depressed parrot and thinking we could either go on feeling miserable or WE COULD HAVE ANOTHER DOG! I ended up adopting a (rescue) dog 26 days after losing my old dog. It was an excellent idea for me - a very happy Staffie Cross - a whole new personality (every new dog is a new personality and a joy in their own right, in my opinion). I still feel quite shocked at how quickly I got another dog but I think that is right for me. My neighbours lost their beagle a year or so ago and the husband was keen to get another one within a few months but his wife was not ready to have another one as she missed their old dog so much. They still don't have another dog. We are all different.

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mrsjoyfulprizeforraffiawork · 04/06/2019 15:01

I got my Staffy cross from Battersea. Some of their dogs are posted as "might be able to live with a cat" so worth keeping an eye on them. My dog turns out to want to chase any cat (squirrel, Muntjac deer, bee, blowfly, etc) - I don't have one but many live in our cul de sac so I am teaching her to leave them alone and walk past them without trying to get at them. Although she was already 4 and a half when I got her, she has got much better with cats. If I see them ahead, I can tell her to "leave" and "behave yourself, be a good girl" and can then walk her right past them, within a few feet, and she will not lunge at them at all. I am pretty sure that if I had had a resident cat when I adopted her , she would have accepted it quite quickly and left it alone but she is quite clever and, being a Staff, very eager to please me.

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Lovemusic33 · 04/06/2019 15:08

Wish I lived near Battersea. I have checked most of the rescues here and they don’t seem to have any dogs suitable (none that are cat friendly). I really don’t want to upset the cat, he disappears for days when I have any other dog in the house, maybe getting one that looks similar to our old dog will help him? So another staffie. I think we will just have to wait for the right one to come along. I know if we got a puppy we wouldn’t have the cat issue but im not sure I can handle the puppy stage again.

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mrsjoyfulprizeforraffiawork · 04/06/2019 15:12

I am sure you will find the right one! Hopefully soon.

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EnidPrunehat · 04/06/2019 15:26

DDog died in January. It is no coincidence that DPup was born a week afterwards (not that I knew this at the time) but DPup came home in March. Perfect timing for me and him. My house is never a home without a dog.

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annonymousse · 04/06/2019 15:31

2 years for me. Even then I felt disloyal and couldn't get the same breed as she was irreplaceable. I've had my current two for nearly 7 years now and hope we have many years before I'm facing that situation again.

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cjpark · 05/06/2019 08:09

Our Dog died unexpectedly under anaesthetic for castration. He was only 1. He is irreplaceable but we felt we needed another dog to fill the hole. We got another one 2 weeks later and he has helped the pain of losing DDog1 and we love him dearly. You love them just a much, only in a different way.

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