Velcro puppy

(10 Posts)
3teens2cats Fri 31-May-19 11:21:21

Just after a little reassurance, it's been 15 years since we last had a new puppy so tricky to remember.
New pup is 11 weeks and it is only day 4 with us so very early days. He is doing well, learning quickly, doing well with toilet training, quiet at night, he's brilliant. There is just one thing that is making me anxious, he hates being on his own in the daytime. I just don't remember this with our previous dog ( same breed). I need to be able to pop upstairs, have a shower, go to the loo, do a chore in a different part of the house without him crying. At some point I will need to go shopping, run errands etc and leave him for a short while. Dh, the 3 teenagers and I have organised our schedules so he doesn't have to be left home alone but it would be nice to at least pee in peace! I am trying to teach him it's OK by rewarding him for staying quiet and not coming back into the room until there is a break in the whining. It's early days and he is a clever boy so no doubt he will get there, however in the meantime do I just ignore the noise and get on with what I need to do? How long is it reasonable to let him be upset for?

OP’s posts: |
MelMumsnet (MNHQ) Fri 31-May-19 13:38:10

Just bumping this thread for you, OP. Hang on in there brew

BiteyShark Fri 31-May-19 13:44:43

I remember those days. Looking back the best way I found was to use baby gates to get them used to you being away from them but still allowing them to see you.

Do little and often, so wander away on the other side of a gate and come back as if it was perfectly normal and not a big deal.

Floralnomad Fri 31-May-19 13:50:03

You should be aiming for no whining and could be doing damage by leaving him crying and waiting for quiet . Personally I don’t see the issue with letting them follow you about if that’s what makes them happy and secure . When ours was a pup I let him come all over the house with me if that’s what he wanted to do and he’s a very well adjusted dog who can be left alone for hours with no issues

DuchessDarty Fri 31-May-19 16:21:51

OP your post made me finally set up a Puppy Support Group thread for those of us who have young pups. We can compare, celebrate and commiserate the highs and lows.

Mine is also 11 weeks (well will be on Monday) and I’ve had her for nearly 3 weeks. I’m noticing a day by day improvement in her confidence levels and ability to be on her own in a different room.

So far I (80% the time) or one of my kids or DH have been with her -or accessible to her - all the time apart from when she sleeps downstairs in her crate, which we worked up to. I made a rest and play area for her in the bathroom when I had a bath. But she is getting more independent and will happily wander alone from room to room.

We haven’t yet left her in the house alone but I’m going to start building up to that. I have just left her for a few hours with a friend she’s met a few times while I took DC to a hospital appt and although DartyPup cried a bit when I first left, she soon settled.

In short, I agree with the advice above to put in the time now and allow him to be with someone at all times, and you’ll hopefully soon find he becomes secure and confident to be left,

3teens2cats Fri 31-May-19 16:53:33

Thanks for the replies. I don't mind him following me around downstairs but I don't want him to come upstairs yet. We have cats and although they are coping well with him, upstairs is their safe place. I have read such conflicting info and start to doubt my own instincts. We are encouraging independence in general, playing by himself, not sleeping on us or excessive cuddling. I am hoping that this combined with gradually building up the time he copes shut behind the baby gate will be the way to go. With our previous dog the dc were little when we got her so I had school/ preschool run to do and just had no choice to leave her briefly. I will check out the support thread. Thanks

OP’s posts: |
DuchessDarty Fri 31-May-19 18:16:15

Ah that makes sense if you (understandably) don’t want him to go upstairs because of the cats. That does make it hard. Will discuss further on support thread!

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Mmmmdanone Sat 01-Jun-19 11:28:17

My dog is 1 year old and is still unhappy being left alone. But, she has gotten used to our routine finally, which involves leaving her for several hours during the day in a room sectioned from the rest of the house with a baby gate. She now just snoozes most of the time until i get home. I thought this would never happen as she was so anxious! Basically it had to be done as I work out of the house mornings/early afternoon.
She still doesn't like being left alone in a room if she knows someone is upstairs so no advice on that front! She's getting better though (slowly). As long as your dog isn't being destructive I'd just carry on doing what you do and in time the dog will adjust (I hope!}

OverFedStanley Sat 01-Jun-19 13:31:33

Do not worry about him being independent yet.

I follow this circle and recommend it to my clients.

The puppy will have needs and cry if the reassurance is given eg needs meet they will then be less stressed and require less reassurance.

So initially do try to prevent the crying when being left - I do not let my dogs upstairs{because I am lazy and do not want dog hair everywhere!] Just for the next week of so can you do upstairs jobs whilst someone else is with the puppy - less crying in the early days will mean your puppy will get more confident quicker.

This too will pass.........

Recavanometer Sat 01-Jun-19 13:32:53

Photos please!

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