Long sorry, i think my dog needs another dog..

(19 Posts)
CrumbsCrumbsEverywhere Tue 21-May-19 14:34:08

My dog is a mutt of 'wolfie' breeds. Her sire is a Mal, her dam is the offspring of a half timber wolf half husky. She's 3 years old and I hand reared her after her Mum rejected her and I was called to help (and just couldnt give her back)!

At the moment she's breaking my heart. She loves to play and occasionally when she's in the garden I see her 'play bow ' and roll and run around and bark as if she's imagining another dog there. She just wants to play all the time and of course I do play with her, but I have this fantasy about her having a best friend in dog form as well as me.

It won't be easy to navigate though and I wonder if totally impossible

I'm her primary carer but when I am working my mum or a friend will have her, this is always fine, she's happy with anyone, shes never been anxious in that way. I never leave her alone for very long.

Also if I'm working long hours or away, shes with my ex (we got her when we were still together but she's always been more 'mine').She's used to other humans and loves most people.
She's really sensitive to everything though. Not a bad thing. Any changes or loud noises or new places or smells. She's a very 'highly strung' dog if you will but having said that she adapts quickly. I think this is a typical feature given her breeding.

Up until recently she was lovely with other dogs. I could let her play with any dog and not worry (although I obviously didn't with teeny dogs because she could accidentally hurt them).

She changed overnight though after a dog attacked her. She wasnt hurt, but it's affected her.

This dog is a family members and my dog has always been very friendly. Family member has two dogs and mine would play with one and try to play with the other. Other hates other dogs so we'd stop her and she'd happily play with the other dog. Family member used to walk them all together if I was working which was great, mine learned to just stay away from the dog that didn't like her. We also walked them all together often, no issues. Then one day I was in the garden with my dog and this dog was out with another family member and they came past. Dog attacked my dog full on before I even realised they were there. Neither dog was hurt, it was a matter of seconds but now, she's fearful of other dogs generally speaking.

I take her to a sled dog play date in a field and she used to love going there, but now she is so nervous and it takes her so much time to build up the confidence to play and if another dog plays a bit too full on, she'll whimper and come hide behind me. To be fair shes always been a clingy dog leaning on the nervous side but she's much worse now. If she thinks a dogs getting too close, hackles rise and she bares her teeth.

I realise my anxiousness isnt helping. If another dog approaches I panic because I can't trust her as I used to. And if I'm anxious she gets more anxious. Friends and my ex have helped with this. They don't get as anxious as me with her and touch wood nothing bad has happened when shes been with others, rather than me and a dog has approached.

Also being hand reared I guess is a part of this, any dog comes near me and she isn't happy. If I pet another dog she isn't happy. I like to think this is just who she is rather than me having failed her in some way, basically because when she was tiny I used to take her back to the breeders house knowing how important sibling interaction is for pups, and let her play with them. Also I had two other dogs at the time, so it isnt as if she's never been around dogs despite being human reared.

My ex also now has another dog, a Jack Russell sized Heinz 57, who shes absolutely fine with. Also bit heart breaking though because this dog isn't playful at all and mine will try to play with her, doing all the actions dogs do when they want to play, even throwing toys at her to make that effort. I honestly think if my dog wasn't ever walked again she wouldn't care. Playing is her thing and as long as she had that.. I've had all sorts of dogs but never one like her.

Am I just dreaming, or is it possible this could have a happy ending. She's young and the fear aggression is a new thing, I think I can get it out of her but I don't know how best to go about it. If it could work, I think another similar breed would be best. And a male. I wouldn't just go get one and shove it in my house with her and expect all to be fine, I'm not completely naive. I also know that said new dog will need to settle in and have a lot of attention from me in their new home.

Maybe if I put my current dog at my ex's, had the new dog settle then we took them all out together few times first... this is what we did with my ex's new dog.

But maybe there is a way... any experiences? Thanks

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Summerorjustmaybe Tue 21-May-19 14:40:09

My ddog hated other ddogs. She was OK with family's ddogs. We got a puppy.
She bloody loved it!!
We now have her and 3 other dogs.
Yabu not to post a pic - your dog sounds gorgeous!

CrumbsCrumbsEverywhere Tue 21-May-19 14:56:51

I've heard a few people say getting a puppy is the answer. I'd always rescue so I guess I'd have to keep my eyes peeled for one in a similar situation as her. Also working shifts all over with an adult dog is one thing but with a pup is quite another! I could call on friends for help and support though, isnt totally out of the questionsmile

It's debatable but I've read a lot about mal/husky breeds and how they cant communicate the same as other breeds so she may need one of similar beeding.

Here she is smile

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Maneandfeathers Tue 21-May-19 15:30:42

I find two dogs much better than one however I tend to try and match personalities carefully.

At the moment I have quite a bossy girl and an easy going boy which works well. In your circumstances I would try and maybe find a dog that’s a little more confident that she can rely on since she’s a bit nervous.

I also try and go for a similar size and type as I find they play together in a similar style.

I had a similar dog before, hand reared and dog aggressive and she loved her ‘brother’ so you may find that once she knows and trusts the other dog that she may be fine. She might not necessarily be improved with strangers though.

I also find puppies easier to intergrate, but finding a puppy of a similar breed and the right personality may be very hard!

OverFedStanley Tue 21-May-19 16:38:25

Your dog does NOT NEED another dog. Get a dog if you want another dog but do not do it for your dog. However you could have major issues if the dogs do not get on and it is a big ask to expect it to go without hitch with regard to your dogs upbringing. Dont do it - enjoy the dog you have

Your dog will be happier with you and would much prefer interaction with you .

BiteyShark Tue 21-May-19 16:46:28

It's a risk isn't it if the second dog is purely for your first.

What happens if the second dog doesn't want to play in the same manner as your first?. Or they have their own issues. Or they simply don't get on in the way that you had imagined.

I would have thought it would be less risky to pay for a behaviourist to help tackle her fearfulness rather than simply getting a second dog.

CrumbsCrumbsEverywhere Tue 21-May-19 16:57:54

I wouldn't get one "just for her, i had three dogs until she was 1, and two until she was 2... and I'm obviously putting thought into it and may not even do it, want to get opinions first. I've thought about socialization training for her too perhaps. I do think she'd be much happier if it can go right, but wouldn't do it if I felt it definitely wouldnt. It would have to be the right one. I'm not 'simply getting a second dog, hence this post. I have posted on dog forums too. She still plays lovely wirh the other family members dog (the one that does like her!) And this is a fairly new issue with her not being confident with other dogs.

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CrumbsCrumbsEverywhere Tue 21-May-19 16:59:28

Sorry for shoddy typing! Slow net at my work.

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BiteyShark Tue 21-May-19 17:01:44

In your shoes I would still try the behaviourist route first because even if you get another dog it might still not solve her fearfulness of strange dogs.

If you can manage that then you are on the right road anyway whether you decide to get another one or not.

CrumbsCrumbsEverywhere Tue 21-May-19 18:16:36

Very true! I hope that because shes young and it's a fairly new habit, it can be switched around. Thank you for replies everyone

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Summerorjustmaybe Wed 22-May-19 10:23:36

Potential friend here.....

stucknoue Wed 22-May-19 10:53:44

Maybe but you are right about needing the right breed, my collie has a lovely husky friend and they play nicely but neither like labs, Gsd's and certainly not little barky things! We say that they are breedist though it's just they love to run

Nesssie Wed 22-May-19 11:57:42

An older rescue might work as you could introduce them and find one that is playful as well. With a puppy, you don't know what personality you are going to end up with.
Heart Welfare are a husky rehoming charity

CrumbsCrumbsEverywhere Wed 22-May-19 17:40:21

Gorgeous, summer is s/he yours?

That's what i want to do nessie. I guess I'd need a phased entry phase if someone would let me before new friend comes to live with us. Thank you, i will check them out.
stuck yes dogs doseem to favour certain breeds ive definitely noticed that.

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Summerorjustmaybe Wed 22-May-19 20:20:18

She is mine. Not too much of a handful tbh.

JontyDoggle37 Wed 22-May-19 20:32:50

Our dog was attacked when young and became very dog aggressive as a result. What really helped him was our amazing dog walker, who got him used to going out with her pack, which included a big GSD (ours is a Westie) and then he started to copy their relaxed and confident behaviour.

CrumbsCrumbsEverywhere Thu 23-May-19 00:43:17

Aww summer I'd love her to be mine's friend smile

Mine despite all the above isn't that much a handful either. She loves people, will do long walks but isn't so bothered if she only gets short ones sometimes, copes with by often back to front shifts and lack of routine,has never chewed anything apart from once when she chose my one expensive shoe in a wardrobe full of primark/hand-me-down ones is okay with being left for a few hours and is very loving and happy. I cant complain too much

jonty I will look into that smile thanks!

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Giggorata Thu 23-May-19 08:24:11

I always have two dogs together, as company for each other. They play, sleep and learn things together. By this, I mean the older one demonstrates behaviours to the younger, like swimming, fetching, etc.

Years ago, when my old boy died, his younger companion went into a deep depression for weeks, stopped eating and stopped barking at the postman and moped about everywhere, head and tail down. We decided to buy him a puppy and it was wonderful to see him return to his old happy self.
I agree about the right breed. Collies and labs don't seem to be a good mix.

CrumbsCrumbsEverywhere Thu 23-May-19 09:50:36

giggor when I got this one as a 5 day old pup, my 12 year old husky took care of her in a mum sort of way. She died about a year later. Also we had a cocker who died about 18 months ago. He was a little old man and she loved him as a young pup but drove him nuts as she got older. He just tended to ignore her though, again all she wanted was to play with him and he just wasn't that sort of dog. I've got a few things to consider about this but I'm leaning toward trying everything to get her to be okay with other dogs. Ideaĺly id go to a rescue and let her pick ;) few walks together then take them both home that's not going to happen is it smile

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