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Puppy barking when left - out of of ideas!

27 replies

Pringle89 · 08/03/2019 18:31

So, we have a lovely 5 month old
Puppy, we’ve got through the worst stages of toilet training and no sleep but I’m still really struggling to leave him alone.

My DH works from home and I only work 12 hours a week but there are times when DH has to go out before I’m back from work or the school run so he’s left max 45 mins-1 hour.

Our dog trainer told us to give him a kong/lickimat when we leave which is fine until it runs out! Obviously try to walk him before etc to tire him out but he just barks the whole time (watched on a camera).

I’ve tried going out for a minute coming back etc and building it up, the first time I tried I did the school run for 20 mins and no barking, thought I had cracked it!! Next day back to barking again 😭

I feel so anxious when I need to leave him and worried that neighbours will start complaining.

I love him
And don’t want him to be upset when we are out but also I can’t stop my life and it’s not realistic that he’s never going to be left for short periods!

Someone please help, tips, advice, anything!!!

I Just need to know there’s light at the end of the tunnel because right now it’s hard to see how!! 😔

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BiteyShark · 08/03/2019 18:35

Think about where you leave him. Does he feel it's a safe place. Can he hear and see people?

We have to leave a radio on (music channel because a talk channel upsets him as he thinks humans are about).

We also had to put opaque film on the windows so he didn't get upset at seeing his own shadow.

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MikeUniformMike · 08/03/2019 18:35

Either stay in or take the puppy with you.

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TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 08/03/2019 18:36

Does ge have a teddy?

A mate's pupper did this. Stopped when thry bought him a teddy.

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Pringle89 · 08/03/2019 19:22

He’s left in the kitchen only door/window is on to an enclosed garden, so no people walking past always leave the tv on and he does have teddies etc! X

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Pringle89 · 08/03/2019 19:22

MikeUniformMike I’m sure the doctor would love it if I took my puppy to my smear test 🤣

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Nettleskeins · 08/03/2019 19:25

I'm just trying to get to grips with this too. At the puppy training class they told us it was very important that the 4 to 5 month old dog learnt to be left for short periods (ie half an hour, she wasn't suggesting longer) because otherwise at some point it would get the most terrible separation anxiety when you absolutely had to leave it later down the line (say rush to doctors, go out to the cinema for two hours) which would inevitably happen.

I'm starting off leaving the puppy in another room to settle itself in crate to sleep for day time naps, going back in after a short time if he is howling (say five minutes) reasssuring, then leaving again. It seems to work, as I'm out of sight, so he is learning that even if noone is in the physical room with him he is fine/safe. I also put a sheet over the crate to make it dark if I want him to sleep.

Just an idea, gleaned from another thread..might the puppy be too stimulated before you leave, and in fact overtired rather than ready for sleep? Maybe a long walk or lots of racing around is counterproductive before you go, maybe just pottering round the house is best in the hour before you leave.

I find my puppy is very tired most of the time, even with few formal walks. Just the stimulation of interacting with people and a few bits of trainign and racing up and down the garden, going a few outings is enough to make him sleep the rest of the day if I put him in his crate and sit quietly or he sometimes flops down at my feet when I'm still. However, he is a terrier and small, so maybe wired differently. Certainly he wants to be with humans most of the time, like your puppy.

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reefedsail · 08/03/2019 19:26

We had a puppy (greyhound) who we never managed to cure of separation anxiety. She cried all night for weeks and weeks despite all efforts with routines and much advice pulled in.

In the end (after letting her sleep in our bed, and realising this wouldn't work when she was fully grown) we caved and got a second dog. Her separation anxiety was never a problem again.

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BiteyShark · 08/03/2019 19:28

It wasn't people my dog was upset about but the shadows he saw in the window when he moved. However, as you have a camera it should be obvious if he is barking at the window or not.

Also the tv will have lots of empty and quiet periods rather than a music channel. Their hearing is bloody good and I know my dog can hear cars and people on the road and my house is a very long way back from that.

I also never walk mine just before I leave him as that can wind him up and have the opposite effect of getting them in a settled mood. Everything is calm for a good 30 mins before I leave.

Make sure you aren't making a big fuss when you leave or come back as you don't want them to thinks it's a bit event.

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twig1234 · 08/03/2019 19:29

The reply of taking him with you or staying in is awful. Life is not like this. I do not agree with dogs being left for long, but for your sanity you need to be able to pop to shops or like you said a dr appt without worry of dog being upset etc.
Our 1 year dog is similar. We are slowly just increasing time away in 5 min intervals. Not managed much yet. He loves being in his crate covered over in blankets with radio on for some amount of time. A filled Kong also helps but I do think he gets upset.

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Nettleskeins · 08/03/2019 19:30

We've just had a very busy time, walk on lead round the block, followed by lots of fetch and he has been extremely difficult to settle, whereas I just assumed he would fall asleep in a second when I shut the crate door in the kitchen. I've to sit next to him for quite a while letting him lick my hand through the bars to get him to calm down this evening, usually he is much more chilled.

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adaline · 08/03/2019 19:43

Can you freeze the Kong or lickymat to make them last a bit longer? Do you walk or tire him out beforehand?

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BiteyShark · 08/03/2019 19:46

Oh and just to make you laugh make sure you don't leave them with a kong that can roll under the sofa because all you will hear and see for a few hours is an upset dog crying because he had lost his favourite toy ShockSad

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Ignoramous · 08/03/2019 19:59

Can you take pooch in the car with you? They learn they are bored when out with you and curl up to sleep, and sometimes if it's cold enough they'd rather do it in the comfort of a nice warm home instead.

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Pringle89 · 09/03/2019 11:40

So sad, me and hubby just had massive row over this subject, he works from home but sometimes has to go into office and finding stressful juggling work around not leaving dog. He said we should get rid of him (not happening) I’m sure only said in heat of the moment, and my fault as I wanted a dog (was joint decision) feel so sad and low - he’s got to go into office Monday and I working so now have I find emergency dog sitter/daycare. 😞

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BiteyShark · 09/03/2019 13:19

Pringle89 I work from home and the office. It is very stressful and I often worked late into the night because of having to look after the dog. The thing was the dog was my idea so I just had to put up with it but it drove me to tears many times. Doggy daycare was my saviour.

I will get better but I won't lie it was hard for the first year.

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Awesomeo90 · 09/03/2019 13:33

Does he bark for attention when you're in the house? Do you return to the house when pup is barking? Is he crate trained? When you say you try to walk him, what for that actually mean; a walk on or off lead, playing with a ball etc?

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Teelav · 09/03/2019 13:52

I feel your pain.
Just about got my 6 month old up to 1 1/2 hours.
After a walk I always leave him alone in the utility, where there’s a bed and his crate. I always give him a biscuit, and sometimes other yummy things.
I always do this twice a day.
I don’t always leave the house, often I sit in the lounge out of site, with a cuppa and a book. If I’m in the lounge I keep and eye on him on camera and try to go back in before he gets distressed.
I can remember a time not so long ago when he could just about manage 20 minutes.
Good luck!

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Teelav · 09/03/2019 13:53

Just to clarify, he’s not shut in his crate but it’s there if he wants to go in, which he does sometimes.

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bullyingadvice2017 · 09/03/2019 14:02

My geriatric spaniel does this.. she barks if I leave her for a few mins (less than 5) and if I leave her in the car to pay for petrol or nip in a shop she goes crazy. So we don't.
Persevere at this op. Every day I tell myself that the next dog will have to not do this. She's 11 now and on her last legs so can't imagine I can stop it now.

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adaline · 09/03/2019 14:05

Honestly? I couldn't have worked at home when mine was very young. He's one now and I could manage it but he still needs a fair bit of attention and watching so he doesn't get into mischief.

Can you look into doggy daycare? Even if it's not everyday it's something different for the dog and gives your DH a chance to actually get some work done.

Mine generally settles for most of the day with a long walk but it's not guaranteed.

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Nettleskeins · 09/03/2019 15:55

it is a stressful time - it is a bit like when a baby is crying and you don't know whether to perservere with naps or just pick them up and carry them around and two parents disagree with the principles/dislike the outcomes. However, like a baby you cannot send them back you just have to persevere with what works. So maybe as he gets older the techniques will work better, but just that at this age it is more unlikely that you can leave him, because developmentally (just like a baby) he is not ready to be left for long.
Most people I know do use doggy day care on and off, or a dog walker who takes dog for two hours and then returns it home.

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FATEdestiny · 09/03/2019 16:30

@Pringle89 what's he like when left alone when you are at home? Is he ever left to settle in the kitchen when you are in another room?

Also really important to not make a big fuss of your dog on your return. Otherwise he's waiting for that exciting reunion the whole time. I don't great my dog at all when coming home until I'm in, coat off, shoes off, coffee made and sat on sofa. Then dog gets a cuddle, but it's separated from my return by a good 5-10 minutes.

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Pringle89 · 10/03/2019 17:50

I think doggy day care is the answer until we’ve cracked it, still confused over the best way as previous poster says, everyone has a different opinion on what is best! 😞

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theyellowjumper · 10/03/2019 19:54

Have you tried leaving the radio or tv on when you are out? This really helped with one of my dogs.

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Nettleskeins · 11/03/2019 13:25

it is actually getting better all the time here, re: leaving puppy. He is 14 weeks. I now find he settles for naps in his crate for an hour and a half, even when I'm in a different room. I'm hoping the more he gets use to that, the better his ability to cope if I'm out of the house. At the moment there is always is someone in the house, but upstairs "unvailable" dh in his office, so no checking in or attention there.

I've spent a lot of time sitting next to him when he was sleeping in his crate over the last two weeks in both kitchen and sitting room (one travel crate (where he sleeps), one crate in kitchen with a bed in it, used less), so perhaps he has a good association. We are also quite random [and boring] in this house so he never quite knows what is happening when, but he knows the crate is a good place to sleep BY HIMSELF.

It may change when he is five months though, probably he will need less nap time.

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