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At a loss

(47 Posts)
drinkswineoutofamug Wed 06-Feb-19 09:57:20

As many of you know Florence came back to live with us New Year's Day. She showed some anxiety, followed me everywhere. The last few days have been horrendous. I'm looking up behaviouralist in my area to help. She's ripped up her bed, all of her toys, wakes me at all hours. I get up with her in case she needs a wee but she walks round the garden checking the perimeter then comes back in. She gets plenty of exercise and stimulation. No change of routine, she gets left for 30 mins in the morning until my daughter comes for the day.
I got a plug in to see if that would help . Nope. I'm a first time dog owner and she's had bad experiences in the past. And to add, she was at the vets last week for a health check and passed with flying colours. And advice would be greatly appreciated.

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florentina1 Wed 06-Feb-19 11:08:33

It is early days yet. It took our Rescue 5 months to be confident and another 6 to be, what I would call, happy. It is hard at first but patience and the use of a behaviourist will help. Our lady charged £60 for the first 2 hours and said it would be £60 an hour after that, in fact, we only needed her once. As first time dog owners she pointed ,out our mistakes, things we never realised about dogs.

drinkswineoutofamug Wed 06-Feb-19 11:41:47

Thank you florentina. My partner is saying to get a crate for her, I'm not sure. I don't like the idea of her being caged up, but in the long run, if it helps. To have her own safe space, but she's now 21 months old. Is it too late? I've found a behaviourist and left a message to call me back.

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anniehm Wed 06-Feb-19 12:05:19

Not sure where you are but I can recommend an excellent trainer in the e mids. I paid £25/ hour for private classes

drinkswineoutofamug Wed 06-Feb-19 12:30:30

Cheshire. But thank you

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yetwig Wed 06-Feb-19 12:35:53

It's never to late to crate train, but must been done right 🙂 have a look at crate training games on YouTube.

It's early days but can't help to seek help with a behaviourist 🙂 hope things get better for you all.

florentina1 Wed 06-Feb-19 12:43:11

I would wait until you speak to the behaviourist, before crating her. Ours stayed one hour in the house, assessing the dog and then we went out walking for another hour. It felt tailor made for the dog rather than just general guidelines. She is not too old, we did not get our dog until she was 7. You would not think it is the same dog now.

She is no means perfect, she will always be reactive and nervous, that is her nature. The training was really for me, I think. I learned how to read the dogs clues, how my behaviour was reinforcing some of her nervousness and the use of natural hunting instinct.

We were extremely lucky In finding her. She does obedience training for Police Dogs and had a lot of training herself.

Floralnomad Wed 06-Feb-19 12:52:36

Where does she sleep at night ? If she’s not actually doing anything when you let her out I’d stop taking her out , either by trying to resettle her in her bed or going just outside the door with her on a lead so she can pee if necessary but can’t do the perimeter search . Also what breed is she as my terrier mix couldn’t have a proper bed until he was about 3 as he just tore everything up despite not chewing furniture / shoes etc and it’s only in the last year or so ( he’s 9 this year) that toys have actually lasted more than 5 minutes . He now has tough toys and Kong wubbas which he takes the extremities off and then plays with the main body .

Potentialmadcatlady Wed 06-Feb-19 12:59:38

I would most definitely try the crate. Not in a ‘leave the dog caged in for hours’ way but as the dogs safe space/bedroom way. I currently have two dogs- both rescues- one has been with me for years and is old and hates being crated so he isn’t. One is a young rescue who came to me anxiety ridden and nervous- he loves his crate. It has his toys,favourite blankets etc with another blanket over the top. He is in a destructive stage- anything in his crate is ‘his’ so I’m
Happy for him to destroy it. Anything else he isn’t allowed to destroy and he is clever enough to know the difference. He has a blanket that is put on the sofa for him and if he needs to he works at it.
He has just had a long walk and I took him through town to desensitise him ( I go to new places/experiences regularly with him). There were noisy work men so he was stressed. He was taken back to park to end the walk on a positive way and he’s now happily in his ‘safe’ crate having a sleep. If he wasn’t crate trained he would never be able to be left. His crate means safely and ‘I can relax’ to him. It makes a massive difference.
Funnily enough I also have foster ‘feral’ cats who I’m working with to help them- they love gonig into his crate too- again it’s their ‘safe’ spot- when not in it they sleep on top of it on a bed I put there because that’s where they feel safe.

adaline Wed 06-Feb-19 13:04:56

Where is she sleeping at night? Mine had bad anxiety as a pup and had to sleep in our room as he just couldn't cope alone downstairs without us.

I would have her in your room, on her bed or in a crate if necessary and get her used to that, then slowly move the crate further away over time.

You can crate train any dog at any age but it needs to be done properly or it can make things worse.

drinkswineoutofamug Wed 06-Feb-19 13:06:46

She is well behaved polite dog. Doesn't pester other dogs on leads. Plays at the park with her doggie friends. Has been put in her place by older dogs and is scared of small dogs. Now she's in the garden , with the doors open to the rooms she's allowed in by herself. The garden is secure. I just want her to be happy. I'm learning off her, I read up on the internet and off you guys. She's had such a hard start in life , beaten , starved and left for days by herself so I'm not surprised she panics. I now spoken to the behaviourist and we are meeting next week. Coming here and on a walk with us. I keep blaming myself. Something I'm doing wrong so hopefully the lady next week will put my mind at ease.

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drinkswineoutofamug Wed 06-Feb-19 13:12:42

Sorry I didn't see these last posts. flora , she's a whippet cross terrier. She sleeps in a dog bed in our room. Stopped her from sleeping on our bed. She also has a bed in the living room and dining room. I've realised one of the latest triggers for behaviour, we got a new sofa. Ordered before we knew she was coming back to us. We don't let her on it. But kept 2 old seats off the old sofa for her, had our scent on. She has the old throws on them as well.
catlady & adaline I will look at getting a crate , put the throws and blankets in it, leaving the door open and see what she does.

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drinkswineoutofamug Wed 06-Feb-19 13:13:41

My beautiful bundle of trouble

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Floralnomad Wed 06-Feb-19 13:36:32

She’s gorgeous and I would say the ripping up anything small and furry will be a breed thing . Could she be getting cold in the night and that’s what wakes her up , if so you could try a housecoat . Our dog sleeps on ds bed ( he’s not here most nights) but we have a routine where he comes into our bed and when I go to sleep (12-1ish) I carry him into his room where he has a curved pillow covered in a fleece that he sleeps in and then I cover him with another fleece blanket so he stays all toasty and warm .

Doggydoggydoggy Wed 06-Feb-19 14:14:26

She looks anxious in the picture, poor little pet 😔

I would definately get a crate, most dogs really like them.
I’m sure she’ll let you know if she hates it.

Also, personally, I wouldn’t be getting up multiple times in the night.
Take her out for toilets before bedtime, pop her in the crate and ignore, even if she’s whining, chewing etc, ignore, is how I personally would handle it.

drinkswineoutofamug Wed 06-Feb-19 14:25:07

It's breaking my heart 😔
She does always look like that doggy that was her first time in her new bed. She's very playful and eager to please in my opinion. She's been let down too many times. It took us 6 months to track her down and get her back and I hate to think what happened during that time. I will look at crates on line now.
I wish I could post the videos I've taken off her jumping around like bambi! Her 1st time playing in snow! Her playing hunt the bone I had hidden in the garden, playing hide and seek with my son.
Thank you everyone for your input. It's been a great help.

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drinkswineoutofamug Wed 06-Feb-19 16:40:53

Ordered a crate for her. She's had a nice long walk chasing squirrels and has collapsed in bed.

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drinkswineoutofamug Wed 06-Feb-19 20:27:51

Crate has arrived, watched some YouTube videos, she's food driven so 🤷🏻‍♀️
Behaviourist next week and lots of love and cuddles in between

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Potentialmadcatlady Wed 06-Feb-19 21:40:50

If she is good driven then get some ‘special’ treats that she only gets if she in her crate/gonig into her crate. My boy gets milk bones (plain little ones that he likes)- he gets one everytime he goes into his crate when I ask him to eg bedtime,when I have to go out... he also gets his big ‘messy’ bones in there to minimise the mess... if it’s wet outside I often feed him his dinner in there too
Hope it works well for him... he looks just the way my one did ( and still does sometimes ).. you Just want them to understand that they are safe and loved now don’t you

Potentialmadcatlady Wed 06-Feb-19 21:57:46

‘Food’ not good 🙈

drinkswineoutofamug Wed 06-Feb-19 23:04:02

catlady , thank you. That was a top tip . She has cheesy treats for training so will get a different treat for the crate maybe.
When I take her for her run, other owners comment on how happy she looks, the fact she comes back to me, and how healthy she now is. They saw her at her worse. That makes me proud that I done something right by her. We play at home and do mental games as well so she doesn't get bored.
It's official. I'm smitten. I would do anything for this dog.

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drinkswineoutofamug Thu 07-Feb-19 18:54:18

Packed the crate up. I know it's not even 24 hours. The poor thing was so distressed, I'm wondering if she was locked up in something similar when she was abused by the old owner. She was literally crawling , licking her lips and shaking going passed it to the kitchen. I couldn't do it to her

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Potentialmadcatlady Thu 07-Feb-19 22:25:06

Aw no... you are Probo right- something must have happened.. it’s such a shame because a crate can be such a good thing for many anxious rescues... did you shit her in it or just leave it sitting there with blankets etc for her to explore when she felt like it?
Can you create a ‘den’ in one room as an alternative? I’m trying to come with ideas to help.. it’s lovely to hear about how happy she is on walks- mine is like that- it makes me smile so much to see him running free in the woods happy as anything... sadly he still often hears a noise/sees something scary and he’s back to be anxiety filled but thankfully it’s getting easier and easier to reassure him and away he goes to run again..
fingers crossed

Potentialmadcatlady Thu 07-Feb-19 22:26:18

‘Shut’ not ‘shit’ (fat fingers!!)

drinkswineoutofamug Thu 07-Feb-19 22:31:51

We tried the treat thing. Had it set up with a cushion and throw. She kept running away from it. I left the door open. Put a blanket over the top of it. Then she started shaking. Then the crawling started and I put a stop to it. She was crying and shaking with fear. We never put her in it. She's better now, had her run out and watched us pack it back up.
She was vibrating with fear. Lots of cuddles and fussing to make sure she knows she's safe.

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