Dog won't sleep in his own bed

(25 Posts)
Hisaishi Mon 03-Dec-18 11:19:59

My dog has always been good at being left alone, but if he knows one of us is in the house, he's a blooming nightmare. As soon as we leave for work, he just goes to sleep in his bed, no barking, scratching etc. But if I'm in another room and he can't get to me, he'll scrape/whine etc. This behaviour has settled down quite a lot - he'll now just pace and whine as opposed to flinging himself at doors etc - although he still prefers to have me in sight at all times.

We're working on it but what is driving me crazy is that he will NOT sleep in his own bed. He whines and barks and paces until he can get up on our bed. I KNOW we should just withstand it but we live in an apartment and I don't want our neighbours to get annoyed. We have tried so many things - crate training, giving him toys in his bed/no toys in his bed, treats in his bed/no treats in his bed. He gets plenty of exercise (1-2 hours, which is more than enough for his breed.) He just whines and whines and whines.

I wouldn't even mind him being on the bed, but he growls if we touch him with our feet, and he growls when he's asked to get down. So obviously him being on the bed isn't ideal.

Apart from that, he's so great, no problems with walking/eating/with other dogs, but the bed is a disaster.

Any suggestions? (BTW we can't go to a trainer as we live in a country with little access to such things.)

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Floofboopborkandsnoot Mon 03-Dec-18 15:21:17

We have this problem with our new pup that’s been with us almost 2 months. She’s fine being left alone, we watch her on the cameras, and settles instantly but if we’re in and I have to put her in another room or her crate while
I do something she’s whine for ages and it takes her half an hour minimum to settle down. I think I created a rod for my own back though because I gave in too many times and she even sits on with me while I shower now. She started her puppy classes Thursday so hoping we’ll get some tips.

I can’t really offer much advice tbh, but just wanted to say you wasn’t alone haha! Hope someone comes along soon that can help and I’ll pop back if I find something that works.

cheapshots Mon 03-Dec-18 15:26:26

I'm sure there are many people on here who can give you good advice but there is NO WAY I would accept a dog growling at me for moving my feet in my own bed! Get the dog out of your bed for starters. Who's in charge? The dog by the sounds of it

snowflakealert Mon 03-Dec-18 15:31:10

The dog thinks that you are sharing his bed. grin

No suggestions (I'm more of a cat person) but I'm sure other folks will be along with ideas.

Hisaishi Tue 04-Dec-18 06:23:05

floof good luck! It's really frustrating, but I don't know what to do. We've honestly tried everything, been to a trainer etc but nothing is sticking. atm, my husband is sleeping in the spare room with him, which works ok cos he (the dog, not the husband) is happy enough sleeping in his bed then, but he will NOT sleep in his bed if we're in our bed.

cheap well, yes, so what's your solution? It's easy to sit there and say 'sounds like the dog is in charge' but when it's a choice between him growling and him barking and whining for hours and waking us and the neighbours, atm, I have to take him growling, unfortunately. If you don't have an actual solution/suggestion, don't comment with pissy little comments like that.

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AvocadosBeforeMortgages Tue 04-Dec-18 06:54:22

Where is his bed? Have you tried putting it in your room, crated if necessary? Dogs are social sleepers and do like company.

How comfortable is his bed? There's no way DDog (a long standing bed sharer) would spend all night in his own dog bed, but will happily sleep on a 15 tog duvet folded into four on the sofa. Jokes about the Princess and the Pea are entirely justified...

Hisaishi Tue 04-Dec-18 07:11:50

It's in our room, we've tried it outside too to see if that helps, but no.

He HATES being in his crate. We are still working on this, slowly.

His bed is very comfortable. He'll happily spend time napping in there during the day, or if my husband sleeps next to him in the spare room, it has a big blanket in there and we leave worn tshirts etc in there so it smells of us...he'll go to sleep there at about 3AM or so, most nights, but if we try to make him go in there before we go to sleep, it's a nightmare.

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christmaspuddingyumyumyum Tue 04-Dec-18 07:17:08

No advice but a growling dog like that is very territorial, he wants to be the boss and he is and he knows it.

Hisaishi Tue 04-Dec-18 07:40:36

christmas actually, that is not really the case. That kind of thinking is about 30 years out of date.

Territorial, perhaps, or more like he prefers the high, soft, warm bed next to someone he loves. As for thinking they're the boss - that's not how dogs think at all.

If you don't have advice, why comment? I know it's a problem, that's why I'm asking for advice.

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christmaspuddingyumyumyum Tue 04-Dec-18 22:44:00

@Hisaishi advice is get rid!

Hisaishi Wed 05-Dec-18 06:23:03


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adaline Wed 05-Dec-18 08:26:53

How old is he? Our dog has always slept on our bed so it's all he's ever known. He happily shifts over or gets down when asked and has never shown any territorial issues - and I do wonder if it's because sleeping in the bed is normal to him. He doesn't see it as a prize or anything special, it's just what happens at night. We all go upstairs and get into bed, him included!

Our dog used to whine a lot when we left the room and we seemed to have solved it now - basically by ignoring him. If he whined or scratched or barked he got no attention, but if he flops on the floor and stays quiet he gets a fuss and a treat. He now angles for the treat if he's been lying down for ages and I haven't given him one!

Hisaishi Wed 05-Dec-18 08:40:17

He's around four or five, we're not quite sure. He was a rescue, so I do think that's part of it as he wasn't very well treated, even in the shelter. The thing is, we never asked him to get down before, then he just started growling from nowhere when we came near him, this was about 6 months ago maybe.

I wish we could just ignore him, but living in an apartment that's hard. And it's like there's no break in the whining and barking to even treat or fuss over him. If he gave me one second's respite, I could, but it's pretty continuous.

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adaline Wed 05-Dec-18 13:03:43

Can you give him something to occupy himself with when you leave the room in that case? So as soon as you get up to go, have something on hand to give him - a chew or a toy or similar?

I know ignoring it is hard - I have a whiny dog who just gets louder and louder but you do just need to tune him out. He's not distressed, he just wants attention and needs to learn to settle on his own!

Hisaishi Thu 06-Dec-18 06:33:40

We give him lots of things. He'll do them (eg nosework) and then start whining.

I can tune it out just fine - the problem is that we live in an apartment and the walls are extremely thin so the neighbours will complain. It's not just whining, he upgrades to barking and scratching.

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Mamia15 Thu 06-Dec-18 07:03:39

Dogs are social animals - I don't get why you would want him shut away from you when you're home when he obviously enjoys being with you?

The answer re beds at night is to crate him in your room.

Hisaishi Thu 06-Dec-18 07:05:18

Like I said, I don't want him shut away. I want him to sleep in HIS bed not MINE.

I can't crate him because he also hates his crate despite months of trying, also with a trainer, who also doesn't understand why he hates it so much.

I have mentioned all this stuff already btw. Please read the thread.

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adaline Thu 06-Dec-18 07:43:08

I know you're frustrated OP but people are just trying to help you.

I also have a dog who won't go in a crate - we have to pay for daycare in the day because he's too young to be left for any period of time with free run of the house!

It sounds like he's bored - how many walks a day is he getting, and what does he get to occupy himself in the meantime? My dog thrives on routine, for example - so food and walks at the same time everyday, we even get the dog walker to mimic our routines as it just makes him a much happier and calmer dog. He's not a big fan of the unknown bless him!

Next week a friend is watching him while we go out for a meal. He'll have his food at the same time as normal, his walk the same as normal and the same treats and blanket as normal!

We also walk ours in different places regularly so he gets new smells and meets new dogs and new people - it seems to tire him out a lot more.

Hisaishi Thu 06-Dec-18 08:11:39

adaline I am not frustrated, I just wish people would read the thread.

There is no way he's bored. He is out for at least an hour and a half a day, 4 walks a day, gets nosework to do, treat balls etc. He goes to agility twice a month. I'm home from 2PM, husband doesn't leave til 10AM. He walks in the woods, on the mountain, in the dog park, at the beach - he's somewhere new every weekend.

He has a routine. The same time for feeding, the same time for bed, same time for walks (except at the weekend when we take him out for a longer time) bed is kept in the same place etc.

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adaline Thu 06-Dec-18 09:18:55

It sounds like you're doing a lot with him. Can you afford a trainer or behaviourist to come to your home as a one-off? Most people who run puppy classes will also do 1-1 sessions at home for particular issues.

If they can see how your dog acts in it's natural environment they may be able to suggest some suitable techniques for you? Do you do training sessions and such at home too? If I tire mine out with mental work I find he's much happier to flop on the sofa while I get on with things.

RandomMess Thu 06-Dec-18 09:47:25

Our rescue is incredibly cuddly and would like to be with me 24/7 and has the worst case of FOMO when it comes to me.

Fortunately she was crate trained when we took on her on and in her foster home was created with another dog.

Sorry I don't have any answers, take it you can't bear her on the bed with you both?

Hoppinggreen Thu 06-Dec-18 11:15:08

The really worrying bit is the dog growling when you move in bed.
A friend was bitten very badly by her dog when she turned over in her sleep and accidentally touched him.

fikel Sun 23-Dec-18 22:20:47

Could you get a chair and put his bed on it and have it next to your bed?
My 2 year old who always loved his crate now hates it. He has become v barky through the night so I sympathise. He isn’t allowed upstairs so I’m often downstairs in the early hours, on the sofa. I have plugged in a dog calming diffuser and have started putting drops in his water so he doesn’t get so anxious. He now has a new dog bed that we have put on the sofa for him to get used to as he won’t lie in it if it’s on the floor.

Doggydoggydoggy Sun 23-Dec-18 22:49:28

I also think it very worrying about the growling in bed, I agree that he obviously has ideas above his stations and you need to be putting an end to him on the bed immediately.

You seem to get quite defensive when people state that, stating that you have to accept the growl over barking and whining, but I would be mindful that what starts as a growl may not stay that way.

Aggression has a nasty way of intensifying over time if not dealt with..

Doggydoggydoggy Sun 23-Dec-18 22:52:47

Also, what breed is it?
I wonder if he is maybe overstimulated and that might be contributing?

I have a collie and they can get overstimulated easily and become hyperactive and neurotic and anxious.

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