House rules for dogs

[Grump1]

Relatives coming to stay. With their two small dogs. I quite like dogs but don’t have one as I am still working part time. Maybe when I am retired. They have not stayed before as they have moved further away now they have retired. However the relatives will not be bringing a dog bed or dog bowl. Not needed as dogs share their bed and eat from their plate and even drink from their cups. I really don’t want the dogs sleeping in the beds and eating with us at the table sitting on their knees! I will just chuck throws on the sofas. It just seems neither hygienic or ............ they have no children and are retired. Tell me how to deal with this for two weeks so that we can have a nice time and keep everyone happy.

[AvocadosBeforeMortgages]

My dog sleeps on my bed, but even I draw the line at sharing plates and licking faces!

Completely OK to say that you don't want certain things to happen in your house, though whether or not they listen is a separate matter. If the dogs are accustomed to sleeping on the beds, they may find it tricky to get the dogs to stay off the beds - I know mine would creep in at night.

Throws on the sofa sound very sensible. You may find it easier to pop to poundland and pick up a couple of dog bowls than hoping they bring their own. With regards to the bedding - would putting the bedding on a hot wash after they leave be acceptable to you? If not I'm wondering about some of Primark's cheapest bedding so that you can chuck it out afterwards.

Definitely not saying you should have to do this, but I'm trying to think of ways where nothing you consider unacceptable will happen to items you actually care about! Sometimes it's easier to mitigate than prevent...

[Nesssie]

I'm pretty relaxed when it comes to my dogs on the bed/sofa but eating from the same plate is gross.

When I visit my parents the dogs are not allowed on the furniture and cope just fine laying on the floor/in dog beds.

Your house, your rules. Be firm from the start that the dogs will not be using your plates/cups etc. Whilst you are eating, the dogs get their dinner in dog bowls on the floor and are not allowed up to table.
If you are happy with them on the sofa then some cheap throws to protect it.

I would insist they bring bowls/beds, it is very rude for them to do otherwise imo

[pigsDOfly]

That's pretty gross. My dog sleeps on my bed but eat off my plates? Never.

It's your house, you do not have to have someone else's dog on your beds, which might be difficult to enforce if dogs are used to it, but eating off your plates you do not have to tolerate. I would put throws on the furniture, and, yes get some cheap dog bowls, don't forget to get a separate one for water.

What are the dogs actually fed on? I'm assuming they don't feed them dog food from their own plates, or is the eating from human dishes on top of dog food.

You need to establish what you will and will not put up with before they come, so that's a conversation you need to have beforehand.

Don't be pushed into having to put up with things in your home that you wouldn't do yourself.

[Zadocthepriest]

Definitely not acceptable in someone else's house. Cheeky even to consider it. I only ever took my dog to my parents. ( Happy to pay out for fantastic boarding kennels for other holidays.) Slept on blanket in kitchen, ate outside (weather permitting), allowed into living room only when supervised. Standard behaviour for even the most doting dog owner, surely?

[wombatron]

No way acceptable. I feel bad that people feel they need to let mine on their sofa so I sit on the floor with them.

I wouldn't even buy new cheap bedding. I would say that would don't allow dogs on beds, but if they are going to insist, which as a PP suggested they may do as they will find it hard not too, I would have no problem in asking them to bring their own bedding - duvet and pillows included. I would also tell them before hand you've bought dog bowls as you don't allow cup sharing - they'd be taking the piss if they acted offended by that!

Cheap throws for the sofas also a good idea,

[Grump1]

Thank you all. The dogs are their babies. This is a new experience because before they did not have to stay. Last time we ate together the dogs ate the same food as us???????? I was a bit 🤭. Water was given in desert bowls. Dogs sit up at table and eat with us like children/equals. I am not sure it is good for the dogs, but certain that it is unhygienic. It will be possible to bring their own bedding, with only two people in the car but I am not sure they will want to. I think some conversation before the visit but no way will they put the dogs in kennels. They don’t go abroad with them although I know you can get dog passports now. Oh well, they are maybe sitting at home talking about us and thinking how inflexible we are. Other friends bring their dog so we have a comparison. She eats after us, own dish, own - dog - food, crate at night, not allowed on furniture. Rules for us are to give no tidbits, ignore attention seeking and use same commands. She is a perfectly behaved dog with those rules. Chalk and cheese. I assumed the latter was the norm. Now to work out how to have “the conversation”.

[GreatDuckCookery6211]

Bloody hell! I am a huge dog lover and have one myself that we all tend to baby but he has his own bowl to eat from!

They are being ridiculous and extremely rude to expect you to put up with their dogs eating from your plates and sleeping in your bed.

They need to be told to bring a bed ( that can go in their bedroom if you're happy with that ) and a couple of feeding bowls.

[Tinkobell]

I've a lovely doggy. She sniffs at other dogs sh1t in the woods and licks herself to stay clean. Her formal greeting is bums first. A v normal lovely dog. But that's why she has her own dishes and bed.

[AvocadosBeforeMortgages]

To misquote some of the other MN boards, you don't have a dog problem, you have a guest problem. LTB.

These guests who are coming to stay are nuts - and ultimately killing their dogs with kindness as we have different nutritional needs as a species. Mine might sleep under the duvet, but last time I went to visit someone and realised I'd forgotten a water bowl, I fished a ready meal tray out of the recycling, gave it a wash and filled it up. I might refer to myself as his mum, but he knows that face licking is banned because he's a proper dog that runs around, licks his bum, sniffs other dog bums, rolls in fox poo, and goes swimming in the pond (and requires frequent baths as a result)

[Dottierichardson]

Totally second Avocados the dogs should not be being fed human food as very bad for them- no way to ensure balanced diet and many human foods toxic to mildly toxic for dogs. Also as pps massive hygiene issues, love dogs to bits and would never use cages SORRY crates, but licking faces and sharing cutlery/plates appalling thing to do. Bad for humans' health and for dogs, as some human diseases can be passed on to them too. So find a way not to have to deal with that aspect of your relatives' habits, I would probably buy a dog book with that information in it and give it to them, and say picked this up cheap thought you might like it. Or on a blunt day just say it straight.