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Puppy isn't bothered about being close to us

(7 Posts)
beachykeen01 Sat 17-Mar-18 08:23:49

This is such a needy post lol but should I be worried that when our 12 week old puppy naps he isn't bothered about snuggling with us... he sleeps in a spot in the kitchen where he can see us I guess and it's not chilly here in NZ yet... sometimes he comes and sleeps by our feet but not often and doesn't want us to pick him up, hops off our knee if we pick him up... he is ok to amuse himself during the day on and off, I'm home with him, likes to play with us when has a play phase but quickly gets over excited and nippy... would be nice to get some affection for all the work but he's not bothered - I'm worried he hasn't bonded to us I guess

missbattenburg Sat 17-Mar-18 10:54:43

I think it is brilliant he is happy to be by himself - this is hopefully going to save you a lot of separation-type heartache later on and I would be encouraging it all I could. Brilliant.

The affection comes later when they are old enough. In my experience, somewhere around 6-12 months you will start seeing signs of it. In the meantime the bond tends to be much more caretaker/ward than friends. The friendship comes along later.

He might never be a 'snuggler' and some dogs are just more independent than others. But that doesn't mean that he won't develop a bond with you. Just focus on giving him lots of guidance and positive experiences and he will grow to love spending time with you.

Oh, and the over-excited nipping instead of playing is also normal, just keep ending play, attention when he does that and try not to over excite him - he'll learn the rules of human play.

MrsBobDylan Sat 17-Mar-18 12:57:41

I guess the breed is important here, some are born snuggly while others like their own space.

I have 3 kids and only one likes to snuggle up, hence We have a Pug cross who is rarely away from a lap!

Trampire Sat 17-Mar-18 13:22:34

I have a Border Terrier. Ever since he was a pup he wanted I be with someone all the time, but sat next to them never on them. He's 3 now and occasionally he'll tolerate my daughter picking him up but he doesn't love it.

He is however very bonded to us. He howls if I go out and gives us LOTS of excited kisses when I come back. He just prefers to be alongside us.

Even when he was a small pup we never had any bother at night. He's always slept alone in a crate in the kitchen downstairs. He had a good breeder who let his litter sleep in his bedding and crate before he left them so he's always felt very at home.

I would say it's a good thing that he's quite an independent pup OP. It doesn't mean he loves you any less.

NotAnotherNightIn Sat 17-Mar-18 13:53:37

My girl never liked sleeping near me as a pup...she liked to have space (except when she had an operation and she slept on my chest for 2wks like a baby but she went right back to her own ways when the anxiety wore off) . If I put her on the bed she'd just jump off and go sleep on the floor. But as she got older she would always want to sleep on my bed.

pigsDOfly Sat 17-Mar-18 13:57:39

Agree with pp this is a good thing.

My lovely girl has never been needy and as a puppy it took her quite some time before she was willing to show any affection at all.

She's nearly 7 years old now. She will often leap up on the sofa to sit with me but usually at the other end of it where she likes to make herself comfortable on the cushions. Sometimes she'll snuggle close but generally she just likes to know I'm nearby. She's happy to be in her bed or even sitting in the garden on her own in the evening, but always likes to know where I am.

However, when I do have to leave her she's calm and shows no sign of separation issues, even to the extent that she doesn't always come and greet me immediately when I get home after being out. I think a bit of independence is a good thing.

The bond does take a while. He's watching you and learning about you at the moment. As you work with him to train him and as time goes on a close bond will develop.

MRSJWRTWR Mon 19-Mar-18 13:36:28

I have a pug but he isn't really a 'lap' dog. He will always choose to be in the same room but is quite happy on a blanket or cushion near you. The only time he climbs on my knee is when he's trying to see out of a window.

Actually, thinking about it, when he's been ill or he was recovering after his neutering he snuggled in close to me on the sofa then.

He is quite happy to be left and never gets over excited when we return. No jumping up and mad tail wagging, he will come and say hello and he sometimes does this snuggling, nuzzling thing.

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