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Puppy’s first night - what do I do about the crying???

(112 Posts)
AnonimityMary Fri 24-Nov-17 22:17:15

The puppy training book i have says to ignore it but he’s been crying and barking constantly since I put him to bed f45 mins ago. He is in a crate in the living room with lots of blankets and toys.

Is it right that I shouldn’t go back in no matter what? Should I leave a light on (I haven’t)? The radio? He’s so sad it’s breaking my heart.

Tinselistacky Fri 24-Nov-17 22:19:04

He needs to know his place op.
And it's on your pillow!!
grin

moodyblues Fri 24-Nov-17 22:20:08

We left a low light on (cooker hood) and the radio was on very low. Ignore the crying otherwise you are done for. It is tough but it will pass.

hiddley Fri 24-Nov-17 22:21:33

Don't make a rod for your own back. Within 3 nights he'll be settling himself. Best gift you can give him.

LittleCandle Fri 24-Nov-17 22:22:10

Ticking clock and a hot water bottle. It settled my childhood kitten the first night she was away from her mother. We did that for a few nights and that was the end of it. When DDog was a pup, we had him in a cat carrier beside the bed for the first few weeks. (He was tiny, so a crate would have been ridiculous.)

hiddley Fri 24-Nov-17 22:22:11

Just make sure he gets loads of attention during the day but knows that night-time is for sleeping.

Ylvamoon Fri 24-Nov-17 22:25:31

He is still a baby... can you spend the first few days downstairs with him? Just till he is a bit more settled.
Or take him to bed ... lovely, soft, cuddly hot water bottle! Go on its freezing outside!

Wolfiefan Fri 24-Nov-17 22:26:13

Throw the book away!
Your puppy is a tiny baby that's been separated from the only home and family he's ever known.
Move to sleep by him or move him to your room.
And you won't make a rod for your own back. That's daft. I slept by my pup's crate to start with. She's over a year old now and just goes to bed happily. It's about making them feel settled and secure to start with. (You will also need to be close for toilet trips!)
If you are on FB join dog training advice and support and read their new puppy advice.

dantdmistedious Fri 24-Nov-17 22:29:11

Ticking clock and hit water bottle or just go and pick him up. Unless it's a Great Dane pup and you might live to regret it!

PoisonousSmurf Fri 24-Nov-17 22:30:46

Don't let the pup upstairs! You'll have to sleep on the floor if you want to be with it. But be prepared to do this for weeks.
Best to let it cry it out.

hiddley Fri 24-Nov-17 22:32:40

Night-time is for sleeping. Daytime is for fun, affection and reassurance.

CornflakeHomunculus Fri 24-Nov-17 22:32:51

Either bring him in with your or move into the living room with him. He's a baby who has just left his mum and siblings, it's a huge ask to want him to sleep completely alone in a strange environment.

There's no reason at all you can't start with him in your bedroom (or with you sleeping in the living room) whilst he's small and then change sleeping arrangements to what you want long term once he's older, settled and comfortable being alone.

Some people leave their puppies to cry and get away with it, sometimes it results in a puppy terrified of being left alone. I've been in the latter situation and trust me, it's so much harder to fix that than it is to keep them with you initially then train them to sleep elsewhere later.

Have a read through these articles, particularly Puppy's First Night.

Dominithecat Fri 24-Nov-17 22:33:52

Did you not get a blanket or towel with mother's scent on it?
It worked for both mine although mine were and are allowed in the bedroom.

AnonimityMary Fri 24-Nov-17 22:34:36

I can’t sleep downstairs as I have spinal problems. He can’t sleep in our room because... DH. He’s still crying though. Is it best to go down every hour or so and reassure him or literally leave him until morning? He also refused to wee before bed and hasn’t done a poo since I collected him at 12.

LazySusan11 Fri 24-Nov-17 22:35:18

I don't understand those who say leave it to cry, you wouldn't leave a new baby to cry! You won't make a rod for your own back by giving it some love and reassurance at night time.

thebestnamesweretaken Fri 24-Nov-17 22:35:50

Find the strength to ignore the howls, whimpers and cries,
It's for the best in the long run,
Trust me!

CornflakeHomunculus Fri 24-Nov-17 22:36:04

I'd also recommend the crate training guide from the aforementioned list.

Being in the crate should never involve crying, barking or the puppy being shut in against their will. Doing so runs the risk of them associating the crate with feelings with of distress rather than it being somewhere they're more than happy to go and spend time.

Wolfiefan Fri 24-Nov-17 22:36:57

Don't ignore the dog. One of you has to sleep by it or bring it up with you. Please read what Cornflake has posted. This dog is scared and alone.

hiddley Fri 24-Nov-17 22:37:45

It's not a huge ask. Yes he'll be lonely, he'll be lonely for his mum whether in your room or out of it. Daytime is for making him happy. Night-time is for him getting sleep.

Rosieandtwinkle Fri 24-Nov-17 22:40:12

We had this with our now 4yr old lab. He screamed the place down! A crate is a good start as this made him feel safe. Our puppy trainer advised stapling blankets over the back and sides of the crate and to have it on the landing, outside our bedroom and with the door open. After the first couple of weeks we moved it to the hallway and then finally into the sitting room. The first few nights will be tough as, just as other posters have said, he's just been taken from his family. It really does get better!

Wolfiefan Fri 24-Nov-17 22:40:25

Not when he's tiny. They generally don't sleep through. Yes night time will be for sleeping but not if he's scared and screaming. He needs reassurance. Then you can move to the arrangement you want when he's an adult.
I slept by mine for 3 weeks. She now settles nicely at night and doesn't squeak until I wake her up in the morning. Leaving a distressed puppy to cry isn't teaching it a lesson. It's teaching it to be scared.
I hope you don't have a puppy hiddley.

CornflakeHomunculus Fri 24-Nov-17 22:41:07

Night-time is for him getting sleep.

The best way for everyone to get a decent amount of sleep is for someone to be near the puppy during the night so a) they're not distressed, and b) they can be whisked out to the toilet quickly before they've even fully woken up.

hiddley Fri 24-Nov-17 22:41:11

Cornflake, that's nonsense. They associate sleep with their crates if that's what they are allowed to associate it with.

ShoesHaveSouls Fri 24-Nov-17 22:41:15

We ignored, but it was awful. He did have another dog with him, so he wasn't alone. It was hell for 2 nights, then he got used to it. He's fine now, he knows he sleeps downstairs, he's happy to go to bed now, and gets cuddles each morning.

Having a pup is harder than a newborn.

hiddley Fri 24-Nov-17 22:42:47

I have reared several. None with any issues about fear or sleep. Night-time was sleep-time. Simple as that. Daytime was fun time and they were worn out and happy to be going to sleep.

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