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please tell me it gets easier - new puppy

59 replies

newpuppypanic · 26/07/2017 07:28

I am so tired and sleep deprived I can barely keep my eyes open. We picked up our new puppy 2 days ago. She is a 10 week old Labrador. We have a crate for her to sleep in although during the day she appears to prefer a mat on the floor in the lounge.

Last night we were up every 90 minutes with her. She's not house trained and we're struggling to get her to go in the garden - she wanders around, does a lot of sniffing then comes in and wees in the house.

I am so tired I can't think straight. Please tell me it gets easier.

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BiteyShark · 26/07/2017 07:38

Getting a puppy is bloody hard work. Have you looked at the puppy survival threads on here. We are on part 3 so why not pop over to join others that are in a similar boat. Also parts 1 and 2 might be useful as well to read as many people have posted about their difficulties and tips for toilet training etc.

For me house training took many weeks. Everytime I thought we had cracked it (no accidents for days) I would turn round to see him peeing on the kitchen floor. They do get there in the end but it can take a lot longer than you are lead to believe. Make sure you go over the top with praise when they do it outside as well as clearing up (with special cleaner) inside so the smell does not attract them to keep doing it.

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BiteyShark · 26/07/2017 07:42

It does get better but for me that was around the 5 month old age mark when he was fully house trained and the nipping/biting mostly stopped. I took a month at home to settle my puppy in and I remember how tired I was, so much so I don't think I would had been safe behind the wheel of a car.

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Yogagirl123 · 26/07/2017 07:43

Yes, it will get easier, it's a period of adjustment for you and your puppy. Leaving her litter, mum and home she knew and getting used to a new environment, people, without litter mates etc. I lost my dog a few years back now after 13 happy years together. We found in the early days, that he was more settled sleeping in our bedroom. I hope you get some better quality sleep soon. To be honest I think most of us forget what it is like to have a new pup, they are very hard work, but totally worth it. Some friends of ours recently got a new puppy, they thought initially they had made a big mistake, but things have settled down and they are all very happy. It will be fine just do whatever you need to, to get some sleep, everytime seems a much bigger deal when your tired. Good luck, hopefully some other posters with new pups will reply shortly with some tips.

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Bythebeach · 26/07/2017 07:43

Oh dear I think this will be me in a few weeks. I hope it gets better soon. Can you nap in the daytime to help with the exhaustion?

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Pombliboo123 · 26/07/2017 07:45

It does get easier... so much so that after a couple of years you think hey it wasn't so bad let's go and get another one....

And then after 48 hours you think WHY THE BLOODY HE'LL DID WE GET ANOTHER ONE THIS IS HELL.

Just remember that the pup has been taken away from his mummy (possibly daddy) And brothers and sisters, Is in a strange house with strange smells and strange noises.... And he's just a tiny baby.

But it does get easier I promise.

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newpuppypanic · 26/07/2017 07:49

I'm really struggling and hope we've done the right thing in getting her. DH has had dogs before but this is all new to me and however much reading you do beforehand it doesn't prepare you for the reality of a little puppy in the house.

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Ginorchoc · 26/07/2017 07:51

It does get easier, I've got a four month old, I stopped with the crate after a couple of nights because she was too stressed, not whining but scared. She now sleeps in her own bed, toilet training is about 80% there. It gets easier when they've had their jabs and can go out.

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ChardonnaysPrettySister · 26/07/2017 07:52

It is hard work but she will grow and adapt.

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ChardonnaysPrettySister · 26/07/2017 07:53

I've never crated, and my dogs are happy and content. I know it works for some dogs, but if it doesn't work for you don't think you have to stick with it.

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BiteyShark · 26/07/2017 07:55

newpuppypanic I think a lot of us have had the 'what have I done, I made a mistake' feeling at the beginning.

They grow up quickly so think of this as a bad phase. Mine is 10 months old and I would not want to be without him ever as I love him more than I ever imagined. However, if someone had magicked him away in this early weeks I would have been relieved. It WILL GET BETTER Grin

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newpuppypanic · 26/07/2017 07:56

The reason we wanted to crate is so that we can leave her safely if we need to go out - I am here most of the time but there will be occasions when she has to be left on her own. The people who own her mum were using crates before she came to us so I'd hoped she'd be used to them a bit.

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newpuppypanic · 26/07/2017 07:58

if someone had magicked him away in this early weeks I would have been relieved

This is how I'm feeling and I feel quite tearful about it. I don't want to be an irresponsible owner or one of those people who gets a dog and decides it's not working out after a fortnight, but we're finding it very tough. And one of my kids hasn't taken to the dog at all which isn't helping.

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user1495346531 · 26/07/2017 08:07

Please look at thelabradorforum.com
It has masses of advice and support for new lab puppy owners, and I really feel your pain.
As soon as I saw the title of your post, I knew it must be a lab puppy. I used to cry with exhaustion but it will get better. My Labrador is now just lovely.
Have a look here, for example
thelabradorforum.com/threads/puppy-problems-will-things-ever-improve.1680/

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GinIsIn · 26/07/2017 08:09

When you say the puppy wanders around outside at night - are you just letting it out?

Here's how we did it: every time the puppy goes out in the day, you go out in the garden too. Whenever they wee, say the same thing - we say "good girl, be quick!" And that will become the command to 'go'. Then praise praise praise and fuss when they've been. At night, don't just put them out, put them on the lead, and minimal interaction.

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BiteyShark · 26/07/2017 08:09

Yes I remember feeling a shit irresponsible puppy owner thinking how nice my life was before. What got me through that period was a couple of things:-

  1. I kept telling myself they grow up quickly. We got him in November so I kept telling myself the following xmas he would be all grown up and lovely (and he now is and it's only July)


  1. I would do formal training for 1 year so he was 'trained'. Actually I will be doing it for longer because I think training is great.


  1. Any behavioural issues that I could not deal with I would get professional help. This was during the biting/jumping phase and apart from a couple of 1-1s for giving me the confidence in letting him off the lead all the difficult stages passed quickly and I didn't need any help. However, telling myself I would get help if I needed to made me feel less helpless when I was in the thick of it all trying to manage the NORMAL puppy behaviour.
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BiteyShark · 26/07/2017 08:11

Seriously pop over to the puppy survival thread. Mine is bigger now but there are still a lot of people on there with new puppies in the same boat.

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Teaandadunk · 26/07/2017 08:15

Totally feel for you. Picking up a new pup on Friday and already wondering if this is the biggest mistake of my life. Do you have a return policy and if so are things really so bad you would take it back?

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Jultay · 26/07/2017 08:21

I can fully sympathise too ... having a puppy is sooo hard and many nights I've lay in bed saying "what have we done " ..... it honestly DOES get better ... she's nearly 1 now and I wouldn't swap her for the world ❤️ plod on and I promise things will pick up xx

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newpuppypanic · 26/07/2017 09:09

If it gets to the stage we really can't cope, we'd rehome her but that would be the absolute final straw. I know it's just the tiredness talking at the mo. And the fact she's just spent 15 minutes in the garden in the rain, come in and peed in the kitchen. Need to get some of that cleaning spray - anyone recommend one?

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Wolfiefan · 26/07/2017 09:12

You need a proper spray that takes any smell away so she doesn't go there again. Look on Amazon.
You don't need to rehome. Honestly. In a few months this pup will be your best friend and you won't be able to imaging life without her.
For toilet training look at the FB group. Dog training advice and support. Great stuff on toilet training.

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BiteyShark · 26/07/2017 09:13

newpuppypanic our pup came to us in the middle of winter so despite it being cold and or wet I ended up wrapping myself up with an umbrella and literally standing out there (seemed like hours with DH coming out with cups of tea) until he eventually was forced to pee outside. Like I said this is miserable but by forcing the issue I could then praise praise praise to reinforce that outside is good.

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Wolfiefan · 26/07/2017 09:15

Stupid phone.
Imagine!
Puppy regret is a real thing. I remember sitting on the kitchen floor sobbing that if I didn't bloody love her so much she would be going back. Now at 10 months she's a pleasure to have around and we all love her to bits. As a new puppy she couldn't be left. Ever. I slept next to her. She was always mouthing and hurting me or the kids and constantly peeing in the house.
Toilet. Go out on lead. Use praise word when she goes. Good girl wee wee. Go out after sleeping and eating and drinking and playing and every 20 -30 minutes or so.
Come see us in the puppy survival thread. It proves you can survive.

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Wolfiefan · 26/07/2017 09:16

Bitey me too. "fond" memories. 1st December she came home. Lots of time in wellies in the garden at night! Grin

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Hoppinggreen · 26/07/2017 09:18

I had post puppy depression- it's a thing I'm sure!!
If I thought I could find him a good home and the guilt wouldn't have killed me I would have given him away, I did google his breed rescue many times!!
But yes, it does get better

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LilCamper · 26/07/2017 09:49

OP you can use diluted biological washing liquid to clean up accidents. It will break down the smell as much as expensive cleaning products.

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