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Hand hold please - giving up dog

(11 Posts)
user9000 Fri 03-Mar-17 18:00:07

My heart is aching right now but I think I am making the right decision. I called a reputable rescue to rehome my dog that has been an obsessive car chaser and barker for the last 6 years. I had one of this type of dog before and it didn't do any chasing or barking behaviour ironically so I wasn't prepared for what I was getting with the next one. The breeder also neglected to mention 'oh by the way this dog will probably go nuts from every car going past' when she sold me the dog. So, I spent a few years trying to train with various methods, spent a few years walking the dog where there werent any cars (but now that area is closed!!). The rescue told me I would never have been able to train the dog out of this behaviour and they will be rehoming her with someone who can exercise the dog on their property securely. So even the rescue said it's impossible to train out.
My DS has special needs that constantly need care and seem unrelenting, I have no family to help out, last year my anxiety got so bad I was having multiple panic attacks, and now I have been diagnosed with kidney disease and have been feeling really ill. I am having tests to figure out what's wrong. I have no one to help other than 'd'h who is only around on weekends. In fact I am also in the process of separation (due to him disappearing on us for a few months last year). So between my stress of ds needs, seperation starting, health problems, I am giving up our dog. I think I am making the right decision as I cannot even walk this dog without feeling full of anxiety about a car coming along and my ds cannot walk her either. We have another dog which we safely walk around the neighborhood so my son will have another animal companion but still...
I am 99% sure I am making the right decision....I think I am dreading my son not understanding and being upset with me for this. I guess I am asking for support as I have no one else to ask advice/support. Most people would do this right? I am not going to make my ds hate me I hope.

user9000 Fri 03-Mar-17 18:07:09

I will add I feel like I am betraying the dog but at the same time maybe she will be happier somewhere else. Guilt, guilt and more guilt!

MrsJayy Fri 03-Mar-17 18:10:48

My dog is a car chaser it is very very stressful This can't have been an easy decision to make, i know some dogs are able to be trained out of it we had trainers and we manage it the urge is still there though we are all adults in my house and have the time. Dont feel guilty you and the dog deserve better flowers

MrsJayy Fri 03-Mar-17 18:13:19

Could you make up an excuse for your son of course imean lie but it might make it a bit easier for him and you.

user9000 Fri 03-Mar-17 18:20:51

What lie would you give? I was going to say the dog would go to a farm and be happier, but he usually thinks in his own interest.

Misovexed Fri 03-Mar-17 18:26:09

It does sound like you're doing the right thing. Six years is a long time to struggle and you've got a lot going on at the moment. You've done the tough bit and taken the decision. I hope things can move swiftly now and you and the dog will be happier with the new arrangement. And I hope your health improves very soon too.
You've been very brave, acknowledged the a difficult situation and acted to do something about it. That takes courage. flowers

user9000 Fri 03-Mar-17 18:33:22

Thank you Miso for your kind words

MrsJayy Fri 03-Mar-17 20:12:24

Only you know your son really I might say something like dog doesn't like the cars dog is going to a new place with no cars big fields. I know you wil feel bad for a while about it is your son likely to go on. Im really sorry dog hasn't worked out 6 years is a long time to live with a stressed and stressful dog.

MrsJayy Fri 03-Mar-17 20:15:01

You have so much going on take care lovey

MrsPMT Fri 03-Mar-17 20:20:24

You're doing the right thing, I'd definitely tell DS the dog is going to a farm or something where it'll be happier.

I'm guessing its a Border Collie? not sure what age your son is but "Floss" by Kim Lewis is a lovely childrens book about a BC that goes from a town to a farm, it was my DS fav for a long time.

RandomMess Fri 03-Mar-17 20:23:15

flowers

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