Dogs being treated wrong

(3 Posts)
sugarplumfairy28 Sat 19-Nov-16 20:42:09

I know I'm going to get mixed replies on this but I need to get it out. Just over 8 years ago I was still living at home, I had 2 dogs a Westie and a miniture dachshund. In the July time I found out I was pregnant. My fiance and I then had the mammoth task of saving as much as we could to move out of my Mums and the flat share he was in. I was completely new to the renting game, and had no idea that renting with dogs where we were was basically impossible.

We found literally no where in our price range that would allow us to take the dogs. I was absolutely heartbroken. The only choice I had was to renew home them. I told my parents and they both told me that was cruel and selfish. They then said (not offered) that the dogs would continue to live with them. I repeatedly asked if they were sure, and I didn't want to get a year or 2 down the line and then have to rehome them. They were absolutely adamant that they would keep the dogs.

In the December I moved out and in the January we had our DS. Only a few days after I had DS my Mum told me that I owed her money, for dog food and that I would need to feel better soon as I hadn't driven the half an hour to their house to walk the dogs.

I had no real objection to paying for the dogs, after all I had planned on doing it for many many years. I objected when my Mum was insisting I pay for a vet visit as both dogs were constipated, and I found out she had changed their food to something less than half the cost, that I knew, and I had told her it had that effect on them - she had been pocketing the difference in cost.

Over the course of a few years DH and I moved from place to place and were still no closer to ever being able to take the dogs. I kept my parents up to date on this and on various occasions was told not only was it OK, but good because my Dad didn't want to part with my sausage dog (and the dogs cannot be separated)

We ended up in a flat where it may just about been possible to take the dogs, and my parents said NO! that I couldn't have them. Again I was heartbroken but I had agreed that they would live with my parents and effectively become their dogs (even though they don't pay a penny for them, sweet deal eh!) This is when DH and I found that renting with cats was somehow a lot lot easier and we started our cat collection.

Long story short, just over 2 years ago we all, parents, DH, our children, the cats and the dogs - all moved to Germany. We have well established that the cats and the dogs cannot live together, they just won't have it. 2 months prior to moving, I had to have the dogs and cats under 1 roof, and it was hell. I had stair gates to stop the dogs getting to half the house, I had a constant stream of incredibly pissed off, spikey and miserable cats. It just won't work.

We are all now under one roof, although two different households. I still pay for the dogs and they do now get taken out every day. What has really really upset me. I sat in Mum and Dads this afternoon, and had my Westie on my lap on a sofa (which I'm not allowed to do, and I cannot sit on the floor for health reasons) and I found that her underside was completely matted, she had shit stuck to her backend, and so much of it I couldn't lift her tail. She had so much matted furr in her arm pits she can't move properly. No-one had looked at her, no-one had told me she needed a bath, no-one told me needed clipping. I don't get to inspect her very often and this was appaling.

AIBU in thinking that they should be checking her, even if they don't bath her that they look after her enough to tell me when things need doing? They call both the dogs my dogs, now that we're under one roof again, they don't pay for them, they do very little apart from telling me what I can and can't do with them. I am so disgusted with them, and somehow myself for letting it happen. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place, I can't have the dogs live with me and apparently my parents treat them like crap. She is 11 now and my sausage is 9 and rehoming would be incredibly stressful.

I don't know what I'm asking, I am just really really angry at the whole thing.

luckylambchop Sun 20-Nov-16 08:21:23

Your parents are taking the piss! Getting dogs and cats to live together is an ongoing process, how long were they together? There are all sorts of things you can do to ease the process. In your shoes I'd get my dogs back and try again. I'm not saying it will be easy but it's worth another go. Good luck!

IEatCannibals Sun 20-Nov-16 08:36:25

Well you know now for sure they're not doing anything apart from the basics. As you're under one roof then you can keep a closer eye on them, groom them, bath them. A westie cant need thag much grooming surely? Ten mins once a week?

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