struggling to relax with new dog

(15 Posts)
luckylambchop Fri 11-Nov-16 17:41:26

Now, I did not think for one second that getting a dog would be easy so please don't think I'm some dimwit who's got a dog an a whim and is surprised that the poor thing isn't just slotting into family life seamlessly.

But...I feel on edge all the time. It's my first dog and we as he is a greyhound we are doing the RGT recommended cat training, we he is a total champ at, and we've got him house trained and he is really beautifully behaved on walks and generally very lovely, if a bit if a limpet which is to be expected.

But I can't seem to relax around him at all. I was slowly starting to relax but yesterday I was attempting to manouever him and I think I inadvertently hurt him, which made him growl/snap (not sure but a noise of displeasure) and now I am even more wary. Even now when he is fast asleep and I am in another room. Is this normal?

I was expecting very hard work but not necessarily personal anxiety. It hasn't been long - less than a week. I suppose I am just looking for reassurance that it will get better, really. Sorry for the ramble!

tabulahrasa Fri 11-Nov-16 22:00:52

Do you know what you're anxious about? Rather than just generally being on edge I mean.

gettingtherequickly Fri 11-Nov-16 22:11:56

Greys tend to be very placid (I have 4 and each are different in nature, but generally easy going).

They are large dogs, so I think it is natural to feel some anxiety, I do somewhat with every addition. Give him space and time (2 of mine need space, 2 love to cuddle), so give it time and I'm sure you'll be fine.

ChipIn Fri 11-Nov-16 22:19:43

The growl/ snap is pretty normal I think. My poodle does that so we're very watchful when DD is near him. He's never broken skin and rarely actually made contact and it's important to remember that's their only way of being able to communicate so it wasn't necessarily aggression (you need to be able to read his body language though).

He's a big dog and however new and unsettling it is for you to get a pet, it's probably more so for him so you probably both need more time to figure out the new dynamic.

Good luck smile

gettingtherequickly Fri 11-Nov-16 22:27:09

If he's a rescue then he'll be used to wearing a muzzle, you could keep that on if you are that concerned.

Loulou2kent Fri 11-Nov-16 22:32:16

I get this everytime I look after my sisters dog. She's a boxer so quite a big dog.

The first few times I had her as much as I love her & enjoy her being in the house I was constantly on edge. I think I thought that she was going to turn on us & because she's a dog she wouldn't know when to stop. Sounds crazy!

But slowly the more often I have her, I'm so much more relaxed. I tickle her tummy. She follows me around. She checks on the babies when they're sleeping she's just the best.

Before every little noise would make me panic, but now I forget she's in the house!

Sure the feeling will get less & soon pass.

Jealous you have a dog! Enjoy!

dudsville Fri 11-Nov-16 22:35:13

I think I read advice years ago that you should try to avoid physically moving a dog for that v reason. As it turned out my two are quite happy to be handled but maybe it will make you less anxious once you get to know other better. I recall being very aware of mine 24/7. I think I still am but that's normal to me now but was probably an anxiety driven thing in the begining.

MuseumOfCurry Fri 11-Nov-16 22:35:18

Really early days, you're both getting to know each other. My dog didn't settle for a month or so.

Good luck.

gettingtherequickly Fri 11-Nov-16 22:35:50

Post a pick OP, here is one of ours.

ruthsmumkath Fri 11-Nov-16 23:11:08

Yes it will get easier - I felt like that (and returned the dog) because I couldn't cope.

We now have a 10 month old large puppy and for the first few weeks it felt a bit the same as you describe - like I could never quite relax but gradually it disappeared and now I'd feel more on edge if he wasn't here.

Pluto30 Sat 12-Nov-16 02:48:06

OP, I think you've got a case of buyer's remorse.

I experienced this with all of my pets (and my children, as bad as that sounds), for about two weeks each. It was an, "Oh shit, what've I done? Am I ready for this? I don't think I'm ready for the responsibility and long-term commitment" kind of feeling, which made me incredibly anxious, and made it difficult to form a bond with the pets/kids originally. And then I felt guilty about feeling like that, which made things worse.

Believe me when I say it'll get better. It will. You don't know each other yet. Give it some time and his real personality will come out, and he'll grow to trust you. At the moment, you're as much of a stranger to him and he is to you, and it can make it difficult to be comfortable with.

Good luck with your beautiful pup. And remember, it does get easier!

luckylambchop Sat 12-Nov-16 06:23:39

Thanks guys, you have really reassured me! Just need to give it time. Here's a pic. He looks sad but he was just tired from a marathon sniffing expedition.

Veterinari Sat 12-Nov-16 06:42:05

Definitely avoid trying to physically move him - no one likes being pushed around when they're trying to relax! Use rewards to get him to shift and avoid disturbing him when he's sleeping.
Give it some time - you're both still very new

Pluto30 Sat 12-Nov-16 06:52:22

He's a gorgeous boy, OP.

gettingtherequickly Sat 12-Nov-16 07:35:10

He's gorgeous!

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