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Dog on The Bed

(42 Posts)
talksensetome Tue 01-Nov-16 11:28:23

I have a two and a half year old American bulldog. I have know the dog for 6 months, he has stayed in my home regularly during that time and he is fine with my children, I have owned him for about 5 weeks.

When he used to stay over he wasn't allowed upstairs at all. However since I have owned him he has started sleeping on my bed with me and my 4 year old. The 4 year old doesn't sleep there every night, just most nights.

A woman I know trains dogs for a living, she trains them for security and police so knows what she is talking about. She has told me to stop letting the dog sleep on the bed because if he gets possessive of the bed he could bite my child when if he tries to get on. She said that is worst case scenario of course but why would I risk it, he is a dog and shouldn't be allowed up the stairs never mind in the bed.

Now I am obviously not one to get hysterical about certain dog breeds but he is a big boy and could potentially do some damage if he wanted to. I never leave the dog and the kids alone together (dog follows me everywhere I go anyway)

So do you let your dog on the bed or is this woman right? I have only let it play on mind because she is a very experienced dog handler.

NavyandWhite Tue 01-Nov-16 11:29:50

In your shoes no I wouldn't be letting your dog sleep on your bed with your child.

PterodactylToenails Tue 01-Nov-16 11:32:01

For hygien reasons I would never allow a dog on my bed and definitely not with my child in the bed.

Floralnomad Tue 01-Nov-16 11:37:00

I doubt I would agree with her reasons for not letting the dog on the bed but in your scenario I wouldn't be letting that dog on a bed with a small child , indeed I wouldn't have that breed of dog in a house with small children especially as you haven't owned it from birth . My patterdale X doesn't sleep on the beds at night but he goes up during the day / evening if he wants to with no issues .

NavyandWhite Tue 01-Nov-16 11:39:28

I would agree very much with the dog trainer for the reasons she's given.

EssentialHummus Tue 01-Nov-16 11:39:34

I have no issues with dogs on beds hygiene-wise - though I understand that others do. I'd think about the possessiveness/biting issue more, though. The easiest thing to do, if in doubt, is to keep the dog off.

malin100 Tue 01-Nov-16 11:45:48

My rule has, and always will be, no dogs on furniture. Sofas and beds are for us. Dogs get very comfy beds of their own and we sit on the floor for cuddles. It's partly hygiene and partly manners. I don't like being a guest in someone's house where the dog jumps on me on the sofa (and worse, proceeds to try and eat what I'm eating, etc) and I don't like the idea of germy paws or drool on my bed sheets/pillows.
In your case, with a child, there's even more reason not to allow it, in my opinion (I know everyone's different on these things though).

gratesnakes Tue 01-Nov-16 11:49:17

I would listen to the trainer.
Does she have any other concerns about your dog?
I don't want to get into a row about breeds but I do not think an American Bulldog is a safe pet for a small child.

NavyandWhite Tue 01-Nov-16 11:50:04

Ours are allowed in certain furniture, they have their own sofa 😬 but they're not allowed on the bed as DH has asthma. But in the OP's situation I think she needs to set firm boundaries and stick to them.

My friends has a spaniel that is very territorial and will not let her DH near the bed if it is on it with her! It growls and has nipped him in the past.

HarrietSchulenberg Tue 01-Nov-16 11:50:28

I would agree with the trainer in your case, although if a child was not involved I might think differently.
My dog is supposed to stay downstairs at night but he's been hiding from fireworks by curling up on the landing from the minute it gets dark. I've let him sleep on my bed for the last two nights just because he's having such miserable evenings, but it won't be a long term thing.

talksensetome Tue 01-Nov-16 11:52:16

Thanks I concede that Dog should not be sleeping on the bed. I think I need to start getting him to sleep on his own bed, is having his bed next to mine acceptable or should he be downstairs?

talksensetome Tue 01-Nov-16 11:54:18

She doesn't have any other concerns about the Dog, she has been great advising me on food and we are doing obedience classes that she runs.

NavyandWhite Tue 01-Nov-16 12:02:12

Personally I would let him sleep downstairs.

tabulahrasa Tue 01-Nov-16 12:32:03

I wouldn't have a dog that I don't know that well in the bedroom with a small child...

You have no clue whether he's likely to resource guard space, to be overly startled if woken unexpectedly...anything.

I'd give him a cosy bed downstairs and it gives a nice defined space for your wee one to know, if the dog is there, do not disturb him.

HandbagCrazy Tue 01-Nov-16 12:40:51

I would keep the dog downstairs - we do this with ours with no issues. If anything, it helps because they don't then develop separation anxiety if you have to go away.

Also, it doesn't hurt dogs to have some boundaries. Ours aren't allowed upstairs and only on furniture if they're invited. It helps them, and I realised the difference the first few times DH went away. As I was on my own I let them sleep in bed with me - over 2 days they got progressively naughtier, going upstairs on their own and generally getting more dominant around the house.
I went back to enforcing normal rules and everything went back to how it was.

HandbagCrazy Tue 01-Nov-16 12:42:16

Also, as pp said, it's good for a dog to have their own space (our have a crate). Let your dc know that they can't crawl in etc (ours use their crate for cover when our nieces are here as they are boisterous).

talksensetome Tue 01-Nov-16 13:06:28

Thank you, I have some good advice on this thread and I think Dog will be sleeping downstairs from now on.

NavyandWhite Tue 01-Nov-16 13:08:49

Good on you OP for being gracious and taking the advice given smile

talksensetome Tue 01-Nov-16 15:12:41

I know the posters here have lots of experience with dogs and have the dogs best interests at heart.

stonecircle Tue 01-Nov-16 15:18:20

No problems with dogs on my bed. However I wouldn't let any dog on the same bed as a 4 year old. And I wouldn't have that breed in the same house as a 4 year old, never mind on the same bed.

pigsDOfly Tue 01-Nov-16 16:18:27

I know you've already decided to keep the dog downstairs OP, but would just add that allowing a dog to sleep on your bed where a small child is also sleeping is, in fact, leaving the child and dog together unsupervised.

My dog sleeps on my bed so I'm not against dogs on beds, but as pp have said, not that breed with a small child, and even if I were on my own I'm not sure I'd be happy with that particular breed on my bed.

Hoppinggreen Tue 01-Nov-16 16:50:41

Glad you've made that decision.
A close relative was badly bitten on the hand when she accidentally rolled on her terrier in the night.

talksensetome Tue 01-Nov-16 17:39:14

Pigs I hadn't thought of that as leaving them unsupervised because I am there with them but you are right, although I am a light sleeper I guess there is a chance that one of them could wake and I wouldn't notice. I would be more concerned that the dog would squash DS in that circumstance than anything else.

mollie123 Tue 01-Nov-16 17:39:31

dogs are usually happier in their own quiet space so I would agree with the previous posters. There is no reason to have dogs on beds IMO - they will not suffer anxiety if they are made to sleep downstairs!

cleowasmycat Tue 01-Nov-16 23:08:09

How do you get the dog to go in its own bed? I've spent tonnes of nights putting him in his bed but 2 mins later he jumps up again and again. Barks his head off of left downstairs, gets distraught! He's a pug.

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