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Talking to DC's about putting dog to sleep

(6 Posts)
EGnHJsmum Sun 30-Oct-16 13:02:45

advice needed! Think we are going to have to make 'the decision' about Emily (12 yrold lab) soonish and want to know what your opinions are on the children and dog euthanasia? they know that she is going to be put to sleep and won't wake up but should we have it done in our home so they can be there and its less stressful for Em or do it while they aren't there so she is gone when they get back? tell them before we take her to the vets? take her to the vets and let the girls see her after? not let them see her at all? if you had a pet put to sleep as a child do you wish you could have said goodbye? are you glad you couldn't? do we tell them it is going to happen so they can say good bye or just after the event?

so confused, I have never had to do this before and having the children adds another level of stress as I want to make the right decsions for them as well as our beloved dog!!

CatchIt Sun 30-Oct-16 13:09:41

How old are your children? I think this will help with any answer.

Our pets were taken to the vet. Dd is 4 and when we had my young horse pts, she wasn't there but I spoke to her in advance of it happening and how he was going to heaven with the chickens and that mummy would be very sad for a while.

She was very accepting of it all and every so often she asks about him and if I'm still sad.

Definitely let them say goodbye one way or another. It would be awful for them to come home and just have her gone. sad

I'm sorry about your dog, I hope you're ok too. Xx

Blacksheep78 Sun 30-Oct-16 13:17:07

Depends on DC's ages really. If they are old enough to understand what is going on, I would ask them how they would like to handle it.
My DC1 (12 at the time) said goodbye to his dog at home and I took her to the vet while he was at school. My DC2 (then 10) came with me as she wanted to be with DDog when she passed. DC3 (5) asked 4369 questions and then agreed it would be best if he stayed home and looked after his teary DF.
Such a sad time. flowers

EGnHJsmum Sun 30-Oct-16 13:39:10

dd1 is nearly 10 but very old for her age and super sensitive and dd2 is 6 but very young for her age (still wants to be a dog when she grows up!).

Our dog Emily has had joint problems for 9 moths old and is now 12 we were expecting to get her to 8 so feel blessed that she has managed until now. So the children have always known that this will come down to her being pts. She is on max amount of tramadol and is now still in pain but she looks so young; hardly any grey, great weight and still a life support machine for her stomach! there is nothing else at all wrong with her, its just about the amount of pain she is in. I think that's what makes it hard if she had 'something' wrong with her we would know when the time was right. but read somewhere that its 'better a week too early than a day too late'.

EasyToEatTiger Mon 31-Oct-16 09:51:55

As a child, one of my most painful memories was the loss of the family dog. He was there. Then he wasn't. As though he had never been. The grief was excruciating and long lasting. We have had 2 dogs pts when the time came. Both times, the vet came to the house and the children were present to say their last goodbyes. It is such a difficult decision. I think it is better to be as honest as you can with children. We talk regularly about the old dogs and they are still very much present in our memories. You are so right in thinking Better a week too early. I expect you are in close contact with your vet and they should be able to help you through this difficult time flowers

Onenerfwarfrombreakdown Thu 03-Nov-16 21:10:21

I just wanted to say I don't have any real answers but wanted to wish you all the best with your decisions. I also have a lab, boy, similar age, doing ok just now but have mentioned to DS (10) that he won't be around forever etc. He seems very accepting. Our vet offers the chance for a home visit for the end which I would prefer as DDog doesn't like the vets if other dogs are barking etc.
Best of luck for whatever you decide but I would say to definitely let the children have a chance to say their goodbyes as she will have been a huge part of their lives.

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