Turned down by every rescue(20 Posts)
I've been trying to adopt another dog for over a year now but get turned down by (or just never receive a reply from) every rescue I contact and it's breaking my heart. I know why I keep getting turned down - I have a 5 year old child and rent a house with an unsecure garden - and I understand a little, I know how hard rescuers work and how lots of it is volunteer work so I understand the blanket rules, but I can't help but wish rescues would at least consider on a case by case basis.
I already have one dog & I believe I'm a responsible owner. DDog is well trained, microchipped, neutered, vaccinations up to date, insured, never strayed etc.
I don't really have a preference on what kind of dog to adopt, I'll happily home a dog with extra needs, elderly or anything, I just need it to get along with my current dog and be OK with my (very dog-savvy) cats. I'm home all the time, I've never been on holiday and I most likely never will, I live semi-rural in a very dog friendly area with lots of great places to walk, use only positive training methods, and so on. DC is used to all sorts of dogs, large and small, is always supervised around DDog, knows how to behave around them. I've got permission from landlord to get another dog. No money issues. I think I can offer a great home for another dog.
Am I being completely unreasonable to keep trying to adopt a rescue dog? Is there any chance I will be able to adopt a dog at some point?
I suspect the problem is that you need a dog that is safe with children, other dogs and cats.
In my experience rescue centres cannot be sure the dogs they have would be able to meet all three conditions. A lot of the dogs in their care will have been placed with them because they have had issues in their original home possibly because of other members of the household.
Have you actually been turned down or just told they don't have any suitable dogs at the moment?
I've filled out adoption forms for 7 dogs over the past year, all described as good with other dogs, children and cats but I was turned down for all of those. Didn't even pass enough for a meet and greet.
I've also filled out general adoption forms and if the rescue actually replied I was turned down because of the garden and having a young child. A couple of places said children need to be at least 10 or 12.
I understand it, I do, I'm just feeling sad about it.
I've been looking at the most adorable young dog who is described as being able to live with other dogs/cats/children and I'm sure she'd be a great fit for our family but the rescue page states they will not consider any applicant that has children under the age of 10 or a garden that isn't fenced in. I really wish I could put a fence up but it's just not possible and I don't want to wait another 5 years.
I'm afraid the deal breaker for me would be the garden. Without it there is no guarantee you can keep the dog safe, especially with young children to watch as well. While your own dog may be well trained enough to never leave your garden, you can never know how a rescue dog would react .
I think your only option is to move. An unfenced garden is a complete no no for keeping a dog.
Ring EGLR and have a chat about your garden and how you manage your current dog in it. They don't have a blanket policy on children, but think about how that dog behaves in relation to size of children. You do need to stalk them on fb a bit for child and cat friendly dogs as they get rehomed very quickly, but we have two dogs from them and 3 cats, and ds only turns 10 tomorrow.
We adopted a rescue with a 5yr old and cats - it does depend on the dog though.
You do need a secure garden - that, IME is non-negotiable for dog rescues. Can you secure it, or an area of it, cheaply?
I would do that - secure your garden, then look up Many Tears Dog Rescue, they will give certain dogs to people with young children. (They don't like you working FT either though.)
Many Tears doesn't have a blanket kids rule, but you do need a secure garden. I'm afraid that is almost certainly your issue - most of their dogs need another dog there, lots are cat friendly and a 5 year old is not an issue. It's the garden.
When we had our rspca home check, the garden was the thing he wanted to see. And at the centre they told me that I couldn't adopt at all from the rspca if I had a child under five.
Is there any way you can make the garden a bit more secure? It may also be that you are in rented accommodation. If you ever had to move, it's difficult to find dog-friendly landlords, so they may be cautious because of that.
However, generally, smaller rescues seem to be more flexible regarding working hours/children etc, so it may be worth looking at those. I don't know where you are but you could have a look at these:
Silver Fox Dog Rescue
Black Retriever X Rescue (not only retrievers!)
Pro Dogs Direct
Griffon Adoption Group UK
They all have FB groups and websites, but FB groups are usually a lot more up to date.
I homecheck for a number of rescues (including EGLR, as that's where one of our dogs is from) - the dealbreaker is the garden, not the children or the cat friendly requirement.
A secure garden (if you have a garden) is an absolute must. Please think this through - it's 3AM and your dog needs to go out for an urgent toilet break, how are you going to wrangle now TWO dogs to ensure their safety? How will you manage when you are involved in interacting with your DC and having to watch two dogs out of the back of your head?
An unsecured garden can only mean your dogs are unsafe, and no responsible rescue is going to rehome to you in those circumstances. I have gladly and joyfully placed dogs where there are children, cats, and all manner of other pets but I have turned down potential owners where the garden has been unsecured even though it's been made very clear it's a non negotiable condition of adopting.
What is the barrier to getting the garden fenced securely?
Seems totally ridiculous to me. How on earth could life in a cage be better than what the OP has to offer? My dog is never taken out the house unleashed, so I can't see why an unsecured garden is a dealbreaker. Does this mean that those living in flats would be turned down?
It's never really been an issue. When we first moved here my dog was put on a long line attached to the wall next to the back door if he had to go out (it gives him full access to his side of the garden) and I spent a bit of time teaching him not to run down the driveway and now I only use the long line if I have to leave him alone for a couple of minutes or don't want him stuck to my side. My mum's dogs stay twice a year, two are fine to go out for toileting along side my dog while I watch from the door and other gets attached to the long line because he likes to make a run for it occasionally.
My dog doesn't really use the back garden to play, it's mostly gravel with a small lawn, and so he gets 3 long walks a day plus 3 bathroom break walks. We've got miles and miles of beach, woodland etc. so it's not like he's missing out on anything.
We can't put a fence up, the landlord won't allow it and the neighbours would be annoyed. We could put a gate at the end of the driveway but I don't think that would make a difference since any dog can just jump over the 1.5ft wall.
Yeah - I agree, it's annoying they can't be a bit more flexible and judge more on a case-by-case basis.
I guess this is why people end up buying pets on pre-loved or whatever.
We got our cat from the rspca, and she did pass us - but she was making a fuss about the road we live on (basically a country lane with a 30mph limit). Kept saying, oooh that road does worry me. I felt like saying 'how many houses do you inspect that aren't on roads?'
I think you need to try and get friendly with one or two of the rescue places you're interested in and explain to them what you've said to us.
If they can see that you're totally responsible and take your dogs out on leads for multiple walks a day etc, then they may reconsider.
I totally get Scuttle's points but people living in flats must have to take their dogs out on toilet breaks (as well as walks) so if they can do it, why can't you?
Barkingmad dog rescue have a fb page. They have homed to flat owners. The main consideration for adoption is that you are home a lot. They have all ages and stages of dogs.
Crazy, OP. I hope an 'outside the box' thinking rescue will see sense and give you a dog. Good luck.
Thanks, Dieu, I hope so too. I really do believe I can offer a dog a safe, secure, loving home and meet all it's needs. I know my dog is very happy and much loved and cared for. I'll keep trying.
One of my best friends adopted her first dog when she was living in a flat, from EGLR. She's now one of their most experienced foster homes and has helped nearly 40 dogs into good homes as well as adopting her own family of hounds. I'd actually have no problem with that (provided the landlord was OK etc) because the owner HAS to put the dog on lead for every single time going out of the door.
The OP's situation is quite different - she has a young DC and an existing dog so she will be managing two dogs and a child in a garden that is not secure. I don't believe for a moment that she would put both dogs on a lead every time she went out the garden, especially while also managing a small child.
Rescues have a duty to ensure the safety of dogs who are adopted. I don't agree with this idiotic belief that any home is better than none - that's the sort of thinking that gets dogs into rescue places in the first place (or dead, when they are run over) and bounced back into rescue after adoption. All of EGLR's dogs for instance are currently in foster homes, not kennels and some wait quite a while before the right home comes along but that's OK, because the long term aim is the welfare and safety of that dog. If the OP wants a dog with no homecheck, then she can go to a dog pound.
The OP still also hasn't said why she can't simply secure the garden.
Apologies - I've just seen that you have described the garden set up.
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