Feeling terrible for my dog 😢(6 Posts)
Please could I have some advice? I'd like to start by saying I love my dog very much but I'm feeling like a pretty rubbish owner at the moment and starting to think that I need to rehome.
Bit of back story. After years of battling infertility and miscarriages I managed to have 3 lovely children and we were told I couldn't have anymore. When number 3 was old enough for me to with a puppy we did our research found a fantastic breeder and got a fantastic little pup who slotted in wonderfully and was a breeze to train, is fantastic with the kids just perfect.
6 months later I find out I'm pregnant again was a wonderful surprise. Again our dog was great when I felt terrible always at my side and no trouble.
However I had our youngest before Xmas and had a pretty traumatic birth which has meant that my dog had to stay at my mother in laws for a week while I was in hospital. I'm also still suffering and I'm unable to walk her and physio have told me not to expect to be able to give her a walk until Lo is coming up for a year. Dh is doing two walks one early morning and one late evening but her whole routine has been completely put out. And to cap it off my lo has been poorly a few times nothing major but enough to stress my dog out.
This is what's upsetting me. She's visibly been quite unsettled especially when Lo is crying. I let her by him as she feels the need to check on him, but still she's biting her paw until it bleeds some days and having accidents in the house when she had never done so before.
It's upsetting me seeing her like this and I feel like I'm failing her. My kids absolutely adore her even the baby smiles when he sees her. I know they'd be heartbroken if we had to rehome but I really hate seeing my dog like this.
Sorry for going on but does anyone have any ideas or is the best thing for my beautiful girl to give her away?
It's so hard. I'm sorry things are difficult.
Could you get a behaviourist in? Or a dog walker even a few days a week? To give her and you a bit of space.
Our dog goes to day care while I work so we kept that up while I was on mat leave initially.
Not the cheapest options though!
Where would I start to look for a behaviourist?
I honestly don't know what to do. We are supposed to be moving house in a month too which while long term is better for her (bigger garden to play in nicer area for her walks etc) is just going to make her so much more stressed.
I have found myself snapping and telling her off with the accidents. I know it's not her fault. It's not her fault I'm tired and been up all night in and out of Drs and children's ward with my lo and the last thing I want to do is clean up dog mess. She's a dog she doesn't understand.
we all adore her and I know she adores the children but she's so stressed and I'm unsure how to make things less stressful for her.
I've grown up with dogs and have never given a pet up before as always feel they're part of the family I just can't help feeling she might be happier somewhere else if even for the short term?
Has she bonded with anyone else who'd have her just for a month or two/ until things easier? this is something I'm considering helping with for a dog I have regularly as her owners have suggested could do with help for a few months when their baby is born .( From my side, I love dogs but wouldn't sign up to owning one fully as too difficult to plan the next 15 or so years! But I know the dog well and would be delighted)
I have considered sending her to mils for a week or so. It's where she has always gone on the odd occasion we had to be out too long for her. We took her there lots with the kids when we first got her and then started leaving her with mil for short periods so she was used to it. It had always been the plan for her to go there when I went into labour as she had always seemed happy to go and always happy when she came home but has since not seemed as relaxed going.
I don't know if it's because she was there too long or if when she came home she came back to chaos (to her) and a complete routine change. My children had got quite distressed having to stay at my mums and not seeing me for 4 days as I was too poorly to have visitors so I'm not sure if that has upset her or it was the being away from home for so long.
I think we may need to see if she can go to mils for a day or two and see if she calms down
Sounds to me as if sending her to MIL for as long as necessary would be the ideal answer if, of course, MIL is happy with the idea of having her for an unspecified period.
The dog knows MIL so not as great an adjustment for her as going to a completely new home and that way you can still have contact with her and the children will still be able to see her.
My daughter is expecting her 2nd child in a few months and I've already told her I'd be happy to have her dog for as long as necessary.
You're going through a tough time, by the sound of it. Your dog will be picking up on everything, which is not relaxing for her. She might very well be happier at MIL's house for now.
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